Living Past 38; Social Criticism; Sheer, Unbridled Outrage; Ridicule; Vicodin; Oral Gratification; Revenge; Firefly; Fiscal Irresponsibility; Blasphemy; Watching the Sea Lions at the Central Park Zoo; Selling-Out; Occasional Uninterrupted Lethargy; Baths
24
My wife, all over again; An author willing to tell Oprah to shove her book club up her self-obsessed ass; T.S. Eliot; Christopher Hitchens; Eddie Izzard; Kara Thrace; The crew of Serenity; Ellen Page, Quinne of the Suicide Girls; Myself as a ten-year-old, so I can beat some goddamned sense into him; Jason Statham, because I want to go drinking with him; Maria Bello, because I want to go drinking with her; Whoever's sleeping with Rhona Mitra; Mike Patton; Asia Argento; Stevie Nicks, circa 1976; Carrie Fisher, circa 1977; Harry Dean Stanton
Your results:
You are Malcolm Reynolds (Captain)
Malcolm Reynolds (Captain)
100%
Zoe Washburne (Second-in-command)
55%
Derrial Book (Shepherd)
20%
Wash (Ship Pilot)
0%
Inara Serra (Companion)
0%
Kaylee Frye (Ship Mechanic)
0%
Jayne Cobb (Mercenary)
0%
Dr. Simon Tam (Ship Medic)
0%
River (Stowaway)
0%
A Reaver (Cannibal)
0%
Alliance
0%
Honest and a defender of the innocent.
You sometimes make mistakes in judgment
but you are generally good and
would protect your crew from harm.
Click here to take the Serenity Firefly Personality Test
I've come to believe that anyone who uses the word "Lil'" or "Young" in a stage name makes completely worthless music -- if you can even call it that. Also, somebody please deport the inventor of Reggaeton.
Two words -- Battlestar Galactica; The Office (US and UK); Firefly; Meerkat Manor; Penn and Teller's "Bullshit"; New York City public access cable; Those Dateline specials where Chris Hansen and his Turtleneck-of-Justice surprise the hapless would-be child molesters
Currently stacked on my nightstand: "The Delivery Man," Joe McGinniss Jr.; "The Raw Shark Texts," Steven Hall; "Smells Like Dead Elephants," Matt Taibbi; DeLillo's "Falling Man"; "Mere Anarchy," Woody Allen; "The Motorcycle Diaries," Che Guevara; "The Diviners," Rick Moody; "Saturday," Ian McEwan; Hitchens's "God is Not Great"
Dad, for not smothering me at birth; Bill Hicks; Henry Rollins; Randal Graves; Bugs Bunny; Hawkeye Pierce; Buster Keaton; Dave Allen; Paddy Chayefsky; Howard Beale; Hunter Thompson; Zorak; Greg Dulli; Woody Allen; Thomas Jefferson; Thomas Paine; Leonard Peltier; Bukowski; Murrow; Mencken; Maher; Clooney; Kubrick; Colbert (for his speech at the 2006 White House Correspondents' Dinner alone); Daniel Schorr; Matt Taibbi; Milo Bloom; Alex Garland; Shatner; John Bender; Chris Knight; Robert Smigel; Joe Frank; Morris Day; Alan Shore; Arianna Huffington; Sacha Baron Cohen; Waylon Jennings; Lester Bangs (define irony: he died listening to The Human League's Dare); Dr. Gregory House; Pootie Tang; The cast of Jackass; Groucho Marx; Richard Pryor; Triumph; The two guys who brought the entire city of Boston to a standstill with harmless pictures of the Mooninites, then held a news conference during which they refused to talk to a swarm of pompous reporters about anything other than 70s haircuts; The creators of Wonder Showzen; The kid who used to stuff Dane Cook in his own locker back in high school; Anyone who can make teenagers stop writing in cellphone text-speak; The first high-ranking public official to tell Dick Cheney to his face that he's a delusional batshit lunatic (thereby causing his pacemaker to stop); Opie & Anthony; Bon Scott & Angus Young; Robert Downey Jr.; Lenny Bruce (do you see a pattern developing here?)