lauren ashley bishop profile picture

lauren ashley bishop

In my dreams, I am a Goonie.

About Me

Lauren Ashley Bishop is an entertainer. She likes to entertain you in many ways. She has performed stand-up all over the country, including venues such as The Chicago Improv, Zanies, Irvine Improv, The Lakeshore Theatre, The Ice House, Jukebox, JD's Comedy Cafe, Riddles, Comedy Club on State, Jokers, Chicago Underground Comedy, The Lincoln Lodge, and Gotham Comedy Club in New York.


You may have seen her on the stage in Second City's Romeo & Juliet Musical @ Chicago Shakespeare Theatre, Eve Ensler's The Vagina Monologues @ The Apollo Theatre, Do Black Patent Leather Shoes Really Reflect Up @ Theatre at the Center, or in the National Broadway Tour of Scrooge, The Musical with Richard Chamberlain. Dickey Chambers totally loves nachos.


Lauren has appeared in national commercials and voiced countless radio and tv ads, including her favorite, Popeye's Mama Slap Chicken. The microsite for KFC she was cast in, chooseyoursauce.com, won a 2007 Webby Award. You can see her soon in an upcoming campaign for Mini Baby-Bel Cheese. Most importantly, she is a Northwestern graduate. Go Cats.


Lauren is a tomboy at heart and has been called "the sassiest person in the room" in at least 4 rooms this week. She likes crosswords, Scrabble, Ghostbusters & Goonies, and believes in the power of filling emotional voids with deep dish pizza and red wine. She is a proud white trash transplant from Arkansas and still pronounces naked like neckid. She will not talk to you if you use the words moist, patty, or panties, and in fact, she may hit you for it if you do. She will, however, forgive you, but only if you do two things: Come see her shows and laugh really loud, and befriend the myspace bee. Do it.


My Interests

I am interested in entertaining you. Unfortunately (or fortunately for you?), I am not interested in dating you. I am not interested in sending you sexy pics. Our definition of sexy is probably very different anyhow.


I am interested in you watching my videos, coming to my shows, and reading my blogs. I am interested in you laughing at my jokes and feeling pretty ok about life. I am interested in singing big smokey blues songs to audiences that don't know I'm funny. I am interested in you leaving nice comments about my videos and propelling me to myspace stardom, because that, friends, is what counts. I am interested in bringing back A Small Wonder. I am interested in Calculus. For real.


I'd like to meet:


lauren "must use middle initial" bishop's Friend Space
lauren "must use middle initial" bishop has 17,294 friends.

Music:

Giraffe Facts

Add to My Profile | More Videos

Movies:


Get this video and more at MySpace.com

Heroes:

Your Mom.

My Blog

Amber Alert

Missing: Windshield Wipers Age: 5 months old Wearing: Black Blades Last seen: on my fucking windshield, where they belong Actually probably last seen: in the hands of whatever puss-bag decided to ...
Posted by lauren ashley bishop on Fri, 30 Nov 2007 02:33:00 PST

Dedication.

I love my boys.Chunk proves his manhood.chunk you are my hero. don't let nobody tell you different....
Posted by lauren ashley bishop on Sun, 28 Oct 2007 08:57:00 PST

advice

things to not do after a long night of drinking:1. send multiple text messages to friends calling them terrible names: specifically because they do not live in your time zone2. post blogs you will not...
Posted by lauren ashley bishop on Mon, 29 Oct 2007 10:55:00 PST

good afternoon.

I am trying to study girls out here to see how they stay thin. Trying to figure out what they eat. So far, I haven't seen any of them eating. I am wondering if that is the trick. I have my suspicions....
Posted by lauren ashley bishop on Sun, 21 Oct 2007 11:46:00 PST

dogs that go meow

i wrote a new blog. it is not here.it is here:www.blerds.comthat is all.i love most of you!good day.
Posted by lauren ashley bishop on Fri, 17 Aug 2007 12:21:00 PST

www.fresh-films.com

Vote for Chicago! Do it for the kids. A short film I was a part of is up for an award. It was shot by teen filmakers chosen form over 6,800 applicants as part of Samsung Fresh Films. If it wins, they...
Posted by lauren ashley bishop on Fri, 10 Aug 2007 12:23:00 PST

take my stuff, please

First off, thanks to everyone who came out for the birthday saturday, and to everyone who sent me messages, comments, calls, emails, and birthday porn spam. It was a stupid amound of fun. I think I mi...
Posted by lauren ashley bishop on Mon, 30 Jul 2007 07:29:00 PST

i can't find a word that describes this week at all.

We lost a good soul this week and a great comic. My heart is broken. The world also lost Ricky Cunningham, someone from Arkansas that I have known for many years. He was a good person and a loyal frie...
Posted by lauren ashley bishop on Wed, 18 Jul 2007 06:04:00 PST

Facts about Giraffes and other nonsense.

sometimes i forget to blog.the KFC microsite I did about a year and a half ago won a webby award. i guess that's real prestigious. all i know is that the beastie boys won one too, and that, my friends...
Posted by lauren ashley bishop on Thu, 14 Jun 2007 12:34:00 PST

VOTE! http://pv.webbyawards.com

Hey friends, It would be awfully swell if you would copy and paste this link: http://pv.webbyawards.com/account/login and register to vote for myself and some friends in the 2007 WEBBY AWARDS! W...
Posted by lauren ashley bishop on Tue, 17 Apr 2007 11:03:00 PST