Mrs. Winkle-Teats profile picture

Mrs. Winkle-Teats

If Terry T. were a walrus I'd skin him alive and wear his husk until the Mexican police came to arre

About Me

hello there, my name is carolyn teats. i am a model. you may have seen me in various commericials for generic brands of plumbing supplies, as well as endorsements for the lovely Otis Spunkmeyer. I'm am interested in meeting fine young men who are interested in various meats of source, and "sampling my wares" if you get my drift. I'LL BE THE ROCKY TO YOUR BULLWINKLE RAWRRR!!..

My Interests

in addition to being a critically acclaimed model, i also possess a sort of hidden talent, if you will. I can ejaculate over 6 feet. Yes, I am a woman, but I assure you that I can.

I'd like to meet:

corey feldman, hugh grant, and regis philbin (i loves me some regis and kelly), tom jones...what's new pussycat, yahoo!!

Music:

oh i enjoy mexican salsa, as well as top 40 hits. i am not a picky woman, really.

Movies:

Party Monster (that macually culkin, mmmm boy), Gone Fishing (Danny Glover godd),Gigli(I look JUST LIKE J-Lo, I am told). I also am an actress.

Television:

GOD, THAT MATLOCK SURE GETS HIMSELF IN STICKY SITUATIONS, BUT THE WAY HE USES ORDINARY OBJECTS FOUND AROUND THE HOME TO HELP HIM ESCAPE JUST GETS MY GOAD!!

Books:

well, i am quite the literary connosieur when it comes to books about SEX and OLIVES. But not together, you see.

Heroes:

OTIS SPUNKMEYER IS MY MESSIAH WOODY ALLEN IS ONE HELLUVA MAN

My Blog

NEW PHOTOS...AND THATS NEW, NOT NUDE :(

I AM ANXIOUSLY AWAITING ALL OF YOUR COMMENTS AND COMPLIMENTS ON THE HORNIPLENTY OF PHOTOS ON MY PAGE.WE ARE PERMITTED TO HAVE 300, YOU KNOW.TOODLES~CAROLYN
Posted by Mrs. Winkle-Teats on Tue, 23 Jan 2007 12:43:00 PST

I HAVE FOUND THE PERFECT ICON TO REPRESENT MYSELF

CAN'T YOU IMAGINE ME IN THIS???...
Posted by Mrs. Winkle-Teats on Sun, 03 Sep 2006 12:27:00 PST

THIS ISN'T THE FIRST TIME I HAVE SAID "WHORE ME" :)

ADD MRS TEATS click picture to see profile I WILL BE YOUR SAVIOR AND HELP YOU TO STAY FABULOUSGet a WHORE ME code...
Posted by Mrs. Winkle-Teats on Sat, 02 Sep 2006 02:20:00 PST

CONSEQUENTLY, I HAVE TAKEN ON SOME TATERS IN MY DAY

Hey you sexy bitch, What took you so long to accept my invite ? Those tits probably touch the ground if that bra would unsnap. I seen woman like you before. Play like your so happy. But all you want i...
Posted by Mrs. Winkle-Teats on Sun, 27 Aug 2006 11:49:00 PST

"IF TERRY T WERE A WALRUS I'D" FIRST ROUND OF RESPONSES

OH BOY, HERES THE FIRST ROUND OF RESPONSES TO MY JOVIAL CONTEST!QUESTION: IF TERRY T. WERE A WALRUS, I'D...IF TERRY T WAS A WALRUS, I'D HAVE TO GET A NEW CAR, OR AT LEAST A TRAILER HITCH ON THE PINTO...
Posted by Mrs. Winkle-Teats on Thu, 27 Jul 2006 10:22:00 PST

A FEW CANCUN PICS FROM EARLS CAMERA

HELLO ALL! DID YOU MISS ME? WELL I'M BACK AND HERE TO STAY! MY CANCUN TRIP WAS FANTASTIC...I EMPLOYED EARL FOR THE JOURNEY TO BE MY PERSONAL HANDMAIDEN. I MUST APOLOGIZE TO ANYONE WHOM TERRY T. HA...
Posted by Mrs. Winkle-Teats on Tue, 18 Jul 2006 10:15:00 PST

FOR MY GOOD FRIENDS, SWEETHEART AND SUNFLOWER

THE 6 WEIRD FACTS ABOUT MYSELF ARE AS FOLLOWS: 1.  MY ULTIMATE FANTASY IS TO BE TIED TO A TREE STUMP FLOATING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE OCEAN, ONLY TO BE RESCUED BY A BAND OF WILD MEN, WHO STRIP ME N...
Posted by Mrs. Winkle-Teats on Wed, 28 Jun 2006 03:00:00 PST

I KNEW FLOYD'S BROTHER WOULD GET HIS..

AS MANY OF YOU MAY, OR MAY NOT KNOW, I WAS ONCE MARRIED TO A MR. FLOYD WINKLE. THAT IS A LONG SORDID STORY TO BE SAVED FOR ANOTHER TIME.  FLOYD POSSESSED A BROTHER NAMES PHILLIP.   I HAVE JU...
Posted by Mrs. Winkle-Teats on Sat, 24 Jun 2006 05:59:00 PST

SHAMEFUL, JUST SHAMEFUL OF ME...

I MUST CONFESS...TERRY T. CALLED ME THIS AFTERNOON TO MEET HIM AT THE LOCAL GROCERS, AND WELL, I WENT RUNNING. I HAD MISSED HIM SO.  WE MET IN THE SMOKING BREAK ROOM ADMIST DROPPINGS OF CHEAP CR...
Posted by Mrs. Winkle-Teats on Tue, 20 Jun 2006 05:19:00 PST

THE UNFORTUNATE DEMISE OF TERRY T.

AS MY FANBASE CONTINUES TO GROW, I FIND MYSELF BASKING IN THE SPECTACULAR LUMINESCENCE OF THE COMPLIMENTS I HAVE RECEIVED. I REGRET TO INFORM ALL OF YOU THAT TERRY T. HAS DECIDED TO PART WAYS FOR NOW....
Posted by Mrs. Winkle-Teats on Wed, 14 Jun 2006 01:17:00 PST