Dirty Diamond - ProfilesArchive

About Me

DIRTY DIAMOND CONCERT VIDS!!!I CAME, I SAID(Mic Stand Contest!)
GIRL GET THAT ABORTION SOON - LIVE!!!
SMUGGLING WETBACKS - LIVE!!!
MYRA - THE RETARD SONG - LIVE!!!
DIRTY DIAMOND - IN A CARTOON FOR CHANNELCHAOS.COM RADIO!!! WATCH NOW!!

ManageThis is a fan video (from WREN - the super villian!) of "Crack Rock Ho' filmed at the Khyber in Philly.

NOTICE TO ALL THE THIEVES THAT ARE STEALING OUR MUSIC AND VIDEOS - YOU ARE NOT STEALING OUR SHIT FAST ENOUGH!! STEAL OUR SHIT!! FASTER!!! DO IT!!..LISTEN TO ME ON CHANNEL CHAOS RADIO RIGHT FUCKING NOW!!!!!!!I am the world's GREATEST one-man Neil Diamond cover band with filthy lyrics! If you LOVE Neil, then you'll LOVE my shit! If you HATE Neil, then you'll LOVE my shit! You can't get away from me, Whore! I'm in your skull like an eargasm! That's right I fucking said EARGASM! And to all you dumb-ass dudes - I fucked your girlfriends - QUITE WELL. That's why your pathetic stick-it-in-her-while-your-watching-the-football-game-whilst -jerking-off-your-ex-college-fraternity-brother method aint gettin the job done. I AM THE GREATEST SINGER WHO EVER LIVED! I'VE GOT MORE HITS THAN A BATTERED WOMAN'S SHELTER!!! Step up and be swooned, Biatch! I've been known to make vaginas EXPLODE upon my voice's audible impact. Can Bon Jovi do that shit? I said CAN BON JOVI MAKE VAGINAS EXPLODE? No, he can't. So fuck him and his hair. I AM THE GREATEST!!!!

CITYPAPER PICKED ME AS ONE OF THE 'BEST OF THE FRINGE FEST' ACTS!!! EAT THAT MOUTHFUL BIATCHES!!!

Dirty Diamond contact info: (for booking me, chatting with me, or scheduling a time blow me ...)WEBSITE - www.thedirtyd.com EMAIL - [email protected] AIM - DirtyDiamondAIM MUSIC PAGE - www.myspace.com/dirtydiamondtunes DJ Sleazy E - www.myspace.com/stripperdjsleazye RADIO SHOW - www.channelchaos.comLove ya. Mean it.

My Interests

Hot Bitches. My hot hits. Goat herding. That about covers it.

I'd like to meet:

No one. But your asses better get in line QUICK to meet me! Arrange yourself in line according to the following order - Hot chicks - moderate looking chicks who are easy - busted chicks who think the're still hot - busted chicks who know they're busted - crippled chicks - no, wait ... , move crippled chicks in front of busted chicks who think they're still hot - amputees (chicks) - and then all you pathetic dudes who aren't gettin any action anymore since I came to town. Dudes - y'all might as well donate your penises to the salvation army, cause you're never gonna get to use your lightswitch-of-a-dick again. I NOW OWN YOUR BITCHES VAGINA. Get used to it, you pathetic ass ...

Music:

Dirty Diamond, and Dirty Diamond ...MY HITS!
"Crack Rock Ho" (Cracklin' Rosie) "I Came, I Said," (I am, I Said) Sweet Cocaine Line" (Sweet Caroline) "Quit Coming To America" (America) "Girl, Get That Abortion Soon" (Girl, You'll Be a Woman Soon) "Drunk on the Cock (Love on the Rocks)And about 15,000 other songs! YOU CAN'T FUCK WITH MY SKILLS!!!!

Movies:

Who gives a fuck about movies? Am I in one? I don't think so ... Oh .. Wait! My favorite movie! "Cry of the Baby Seal", directed by Mike Hans. It's a heartwarming tale of two brothers - who happen to beat the shit outta baby seals for a living. Sleazy is the star!! Priceless!

Television:

Ever since Silver Spoons went off the air, television has been pretty much fucking useless.

Books:

I know there's volumes of books written about me, Dirty Diamond. As soon as I find the amazon.com links to all 2867 of my books, I will post them here ... Just give me a second to look ...
adopt your own virtual pet!

Heroes:

Me me me. And not you - me.

My Blog

Some Poems I did ... Part 2!

Ahem ... A POEM By Dirty Fucking Diamond Called BRICK IN YOUR ASS ... (Here goes) I will throw a BRICK IN YOUR ASS, Mary. I will straight wind up and throw a brick at your weird asshole SOOO...
Posted by Dirty Diamond on Sat, 29 Dec 2007 08:05:00 PST

Sample poems I did for those who left RSVPs to my event 12/29!

If you RSVPed my Event page already, YOU TOO may be entitled for a FREE COMMENT POEM! If you haven't, DO SO NOW! Then send me an email telling me you did so I can fucking check. Here is a sample of so...
Posted by Dirty Diamond on Mon, 24 Dec 2007 03:03:00 PST

Photoshop Question! Anybody good at this shit?

..> Photoshop Question! Anybody good at this shit? I've been making flyers for my shows an posting them on MySpace as JPEGs.They look great (nice an vibrant) on Photoshop, but when I upload them t...
Posted by Dirty Diamond on Mon, 10 Dec 2007 12:35:00 PST

No one’s left my MySpace Voicemail a message - in a WHILE!!!

Besides DJ Trans Am. Thank you, DJ Trans Am :-) For the Anal Warts, that is. Your message, however, was Alright. At best. C'MON PEOPLE!!! All my new fucking fans. No one wanted to leave their v...
Posted by Dirty Diamond on Wed, 05 Dec 2007 03:37:00 PST

The winner of the Sat Dec 29 Free show essay is ...

One of our biggest fans (Walter) wrote - Here's a fucking poem. Do it on that saturday, cuz i'll be there!! Now where's my shit?? ^)^ Now ... many of you who entered might be lik...
Posted by Dirty Diamond on Wed, 05 Dec 2007 07:25:00 PST

My Khyber show got CANCELED - and for ONCE - it wasn’t MY FAULT!!!

REPOST REPOST REPOST REPOST My Khyber show got SHUT DOWN - and for ONCE - it wasn't MY FAULT! Hi. I'm Dirty Fucking Diamond. Very simply put, The Philly L & I inspectors came into th...
Posted by Dirty Diamond on Thu, 22 Nov 2007 01:55:00 PST

Dirty Diamonds Two-Year Aniversary Show Wed 11-21! COME BE IN THE DIRTY DIAMOND MOVIE!!

Hosted By: Dirty DiamondWhen: Wednesday Nov 21, 2007at 9:00 PMWhere: The Khyber56. South 2nd StreetPhiladelphia, Pennsylvania|39 19019United StatesDescription:Dirty Diamond Click Here To View Event ...
Posted by Dirty Diamond on Sat, 03 Nov 2007 08:08:00 PST

DIRTY DIAMOND TWO-YEAR ROCK-N-ROLL ANNIVERSARY SHOW @ THE KHYBER THANKSGIVING EVE 11-21!!!

OUR GREATEST SHOW EVER. PERIOD. That's what were bringing you on that very special night. - MORE CD GIVEAWAYS - MANY, MANY MAAAANY MORE VIBRATOR GIVEAWAYS - NEW LIVE SONGS - A NEW...
Posted by Dirty Diamond on Tue, 16 Oct 2007 08:49:00 PST

Dirty Diamonds 1st Southern U.S. Tour The South Aint Ready &

Dirty Diamond's 1st Southern U.S. Tour The South Aint Ready That's right folks. Dirty Fucking Diamond is going NATIONAL launching the 1st leg of many short run tours & The 1st leg?&nb...
Posted by Dirty Diamond on Sun, 07 Oct 2007 06:53:00 PST

I’m hosting The Bad Boys Of Philly Comedy Sept 20th!

Hosted By: Sleazy EWhen: Thursday Sep 20, 2007 at 7:00 PMWhere: The Trocadero Theatre1003 Arch st.Philadelphia, PA 19107United StatesDescription:Sleazy E Click Here To View Event...
Posted by Dirty Diamond on Sat, 01 Sep 2007 11:18:00 PST