Urban Deva profile picture

Urban Deva

runningintomyself

About Me

I write in an attempt to make sense of my life, of the world; to relive, relieve and re-examine moments on the page, attempting where possible to remove the raw, uncensored emotion that may have previously marred my view. Sometimes it works, othertimes not. Still, I carry on regardless.I have faith, am an idealist sometimes to the point of outright naïveté. I’ve no idea what it’s rooted in or from where my beliefs stem: an eternal well of Hope perhaps? Who knows? Absolute despair however, is a door I’ve knocked upon countless times and although frequently invited in, I’ve resisted.Just about.So, I try to make sense of my life, of the world. I ask questions, always questions. Searching. I search for meaning and hope one day it will all work itself out; perhaps not in my lifetime, but one day. If I can contribute towards that in some small way, make a difference; leave the world a little better than before I arrived, infused with a little more hope, I shall face the dark door knowing I lived. I just hope death finds me fully alive.And if on top of all that I also have the opportunity to love and allow myself to be loved, with passion and verve, then perhaps, perhaps, I’ll have realised my Destiny.~[Deva (PRONOUNCED DAY'vah) is a Sanskrit word that literally translated means Radiant or Shining One and is used to refer to deities. I am aware as a female I should be Devi, but I prefer the feel of the word Deva. As we are all part of the Whole and therefore that which creates us, I believe we all Shine. Born and raised in the city, I am Urban Deva.]When we talk about settling the world's problems, we're barking up the wrong tree. The world is perfect. It's a mess. It has always been a mess. We are not going to change it. Our job is to straighten out our own lives. Joseph Campbell MyGen Profile Generator

My Interests

I run. Marathons. I'm learning to take care of my body for the first time in my adult life, nourishing it with nutritious, healthy food. And I travel. I live for travelling. But if you're really interested in knowing what makes me tick, read my posts.~ A life truly lived constantly burns away veils of illusion, opening our eyes to our uniqueness.A life truly lived burns away what is no longer relevant, gradually reveals our essence until, at last, we are strong enough to stand in our naked truth.Marion WoodmanPeople think this exploration of self is self-centered and selfish, but I notice that whenever I clear up something for myself it quickly affects everyone around me, as if it were a psychic liberation which in turn affects others' conflicts. Anais Nin

I'd like to meet:

Rosa Parks - Who sat where she wanted and changed the course of history.Anyone with the Courage to follow their hearts, who walk with Dignity and Grace. I'd like to meet my Father who I don't know. I'd also have liked to have met my Grandfather who passed away when my Mother was still a child. I miss their presence in my life. Aside from them, I'd travel back and forth throughout time and walk aside and talk a while with some of the most inspiring people from history. From Dr King to Jesus, Nelson Mandela to Gandhi, Joseph Campbell to Marie-Louise von Franz, Rosa Parks to Mother Teresa, Anne Frank to Emily Dickinson; people with the strongest personal beliefs and deepest conviction in what they stood for; people who strived to make this planet better and more peaceful for those of us who walk upon it today. Still, we have a long way to go and so the call continues to go out for those who are as willing to stick their head above the parapet and take a stand for their hearts. The question is, what do You believe in? More importantly, do you have the courage and conviction to embody your truth and live it humbly, wholly, consistently, every day for the rest of your life?Viktor E. Frankl, who said:-Our generation is realistic, for we have come to know man as he really is. After all, man is that being who invented the gas chambers of Auschwitz; however, he is also that being who entered those gas chambers upright, with the Lord's Prayer or the Shema Yisrael on his lips. Emily PankhurstBorn in my home city Manchester, U.K. shown above being arrested for attempting to win women equal voting rights to men in the UK. She died in 1928, just a few weeks before this was finally achieved.Close your eyes and imagine for a moment what it would look like if every Palestinian, Lebanese and Jew laid down their weapons and embraced one another as brothers. Imagine the effect that would have on the planet, if those images were beamed around the world on today's news. Hold that image as vivdly as possible in your mind's eye. How does that make you feel? What hope would that give to you? Imagine just how powerful that would be for us all. Now begin with yourself and personify that love, grace and compassion in all that you do and with everyone that you meet today, tomorrow and for the rest of your life. It's time for all of us to lay aside our pettiness and begin to see one another for what we truly are - brothers and sisters.Be the change you wish to see in the world. GandhiOn April 7th 1994, the collective consciousness of Humanity fell unconscious to the cries of its own. There it remained for 100 days, during which an average of 6 men, women and children were brutally slaughtered, every...single...minute. 100 days and 800,000 Rwandan lives later we finally awoke with blood on our hands to genocide of incomprehensible proportions. For 100 days Humanity turned on itself and forgot its truth; we are One. I now invite you to close your eyes for a moment and imagine yourself standing face to face with a survivor. Holding their hands promise them, your brother or sister of Humanity, that for as long as you walk this earth, you shall never again forsake them. May you be able to say you were a part of the generation that rose up and said No More. May you live to see the day, that will be peace on Earth.You may say that I'm a dreamer, But I'm not the only one, I hope someday you'll join us, And the world will live as one. John Lennon ‘Imagine’.. Powered by filmloop.myfabrik.com

Music:

Music is and always has been a huge part of my life. My parents had an incredible knowledge and wide and varied taste in all genres of music from the 1950's through to the present; from classical to rock to pop, they knew (and played) it all. Therefore, my taste is incredibly varied and extremely eclectic. I like music to reflect my mood, evoke emotion and move me in one way or another.
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Movies:

Anything that moves me and challenges my perspective on life. The clips featured in the video montage below are based on Joseph Campbell's book Hero with a Thousand Faces and the basic components that constitute myth.The Hero's Journey in Film

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Television:

I can take it or leave it...I read and walked for miles at night along the beach, writing bad blank verse and searching endlessly for someone wonderful who would step out of the darkness and change my life. It never crossed my mind that that person could be me. Anna Quindlen

Books:

Right now, I have several books/audiobooks on the go, which include:Alan Watt's Do You Do It or Does It Do You? (audiobook), is one of Watts’ most engaging and profound seminars, bringing his trademark eloquence and mischievous insight to the possibility that we may be much more than who think we are.The Feminine In Fairy Tales, by Marie-Louise von Franz. Dr. Von Franz discusses the archetypes and symbolic themes that appear in fairy tales as well as dreams and fantasies, draws practical advice from the tales and demonstrates its application in case studies from her analytical practice.Marion Woodman's The Crown of Age (audiobook). Woodman examines what it means to pass through life’s many crossroads and thresholds, emerging as an elder: the embodiment of wisdom, wholeness and truth.On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft, by Stephen King.Edith Hamilton's classic text, Mythology.Finally, Living Your Unlived Life: Coping with Unrealised Dreams and Fulfilling Your Purpose in the Second Half of Life, by Robert A. Johnson and Jerry Ruhl. We all carry a vast inventory of abandoned, unrealised or underdeveloped talents. These do not just 'go away' through underuse or by discarding them. Instead they go underground and become troublesome - sometimes tormenting - as we grow older. Jungian psychologists, Johnson and Ruhl help us understand our own heritage of unlived life and how it must be examined and transformed if we are to make peace with ourselves and others in middle age and beyond. MyGen Profile Generator

Heroes:

I'm trying to be my own hero.What must I give more death to today, in order to generate more life? What do I know should die, but am hesitant to allow to do so? What must die in me in order for me to love? What not-beauty do I fear? Of what use is the power of the not-beautiful to me today? What should die today? What should live? What life am I afraid to give birth to? If not now, when? Clarissa Pinkola EstésPsychological work is soul work; by soul, I mean the eternal part of us that lives in this body for a few years, the timeless part of ourselves that wants to create timeless objects like art, painting and architecture. Whenever the ego surrenders to the archetypal images of the unconscious, time meets the timeless. Insofar as those moments are conscious, they are psychological — they belong to the soul. For me, soul-making is allowing the eternal essence to enter and experience the outer world through all the orifices of the body, so that the soul grows during its time on Earth. It grows like an embryo in the womb. Soul-making is constantly confronting the paradox that an eternal being is dwelling in a temporal body. That’s why it suffers and learns by heart.Marion WoodmanYou Reading This, Be ReadyStarting here, what do you want to remember? How sunlight creeps along a shining floor? What scent of old wood hovers, what softened sound from outside fills the air?Will you ever bring a better gift for the world than the breathing respect that you carry wherever you go right now? Are you waiting for time to show you some better thoughts?When you turn around, starting here, lift this new glimpse that you found; carry into evening all that you want from this day. This interval you spent reading or hearing this, keep it for life -What can anyone give you greater than now, starting here, right in this room, when you turn around?William Stafford MyGen Profile Generator

My Blog

Loneliness. Liminality. Ambiguity.

It creeps up on you. Except it hasn't crept up so much, rather, stayed sat in my rear view mirror for some time now, tailing me. A ghostly trail I can't exorcise.I was out on Saturday night with my ...
Posted by Urban Deva on Mon, 09 Jun 2008 03:46:00 PST

Run Through The Raindrops

Good grief, no blogs for ages then three come along at once.I mentioned in my last photoblog - Trading Places - I'd be taking part in a locally arranged 5K (3.1 mile) run today. My friend Roxy regul...
Posted by Urban Deva on Sun, 01 Jun 2008 01:33:00 PST

Trading Places

I'm a bit behind on the old blogging front.  I've been sidetracked with one thing or another.  Watching/celebrating Manchester United's European Cup triumph with my friend Bertolini, in Manc...
Posted by Urban Deva on Thu, 29 May 2008 11:47:00 PST

Our Day Out (Photoblog)

One lazy May Bank Holiday a couple of weeks ago, I met long-time MySpacian friend, Bev, when she decided to hop on a train down from the Lake District and visit me in my home city of Manchester (home ...
Posted by Urban Deva on Mon, 19 May 2008 09:26:00 PST

Eric-Shaped Hole

I don't know where to begin, how to say this.Long-time readers will remember i amEricAn dreFourier sharing so passionately, thoughtfully and openly on my blog last year.  He was a guy who enthusi...
Posted by Urban Deva on Thu, 08 May 2008 01:46:00 PST

Red Tent

Ok ladies, I'd like your feedback.  From time to time, I'd like to throw questions a little further afield than just my female friends at home.  An International Sisterhood if you like. ...
Posted by Urban Deva on Thu, 01 May 2008 02:52:00 PST

Inner Work

I'm blog pimping.   Robert A. Johnson I love this guy's work.  Favourite books include He, She and Balancing Heaven and Earth: A Memoir of Visions, Dream and Realisations.  Today, ...
Posted by Urban Deva on Tue, 29 Apr 2008 08:25:00 PST

Know Thyself

     The thing is, I don't.  Not really.       But considering 87% of the universe is said to be dark matter and as such, unknown, that potentially ma...
Posted by Urban Deva on Tue, 22 Apr 2008 12:51:00 PST

Yeastie Beasties

Today sees the beginning of week four of my diet detox.  Except it's now extended.  Indefinitely.To be honest I'm pleasantly surprised how easy it's been.  Just to recap, I'm avoiding red meat, wheat,...
Posted by Urban Deva on Tue, 15 Apr 2008 09:51:00 PST

Slowly, Slowly, Catchy Monkey

So Bing and I are almost two weeks into our reformed Way of Life (diaita) and so far, so good.  And it would seem from numerous emails, comments and messages I’ve received, we’re not ...
Posted by Urban Deva on Sun, 06 Apr 2008 02:42:00 PST