walt disney's cryogenically frozen head

About Me

I was born in Chicago in 1901 and given the name Walter Elias Disney. My first job was a newspaper delivery boy, which I'd do rain or shine or blizzard or tornado. It was during this time that I took some classes at the Art Academy in Chicago and my interest in cartooning began. I dropped out of high school at the age of 16 to join in the war effort and was shipped off to France with the Red Cross just in time for the first world war to come to an end. I spent the next year driving cartoon-covered ambulances around France and partaking in the post-war festivities. A few years later, me and a fella named Ub made some cartoons with the help of my brother Roy that gained some popularity. A few years after, I had gathered together the best bunch of animators the world had to offer. We called them the Nine Old Men, and we made some fine movies, but then another War dropped in on our studios in Burbank, and our attentions shifted a little for a few years. After the WWII was over, I had a big idea come to me on one sunny afternoon at the park with my kids. Amusement parks are filthy and not too friendly for families. The point is, I wanted to build one that wasn't, and Disneyland came to be. Then I smoked a lot and got cancer. The Doctor took an X-RAY and said that the spot on my lung looked like Mickey's head. He removed the "hidden Mickey", but I still died. My head was cryogenically frozen, though, and this new, pale version of my former self was born and stored in the basement of CALarts. As soon as those genius scientists of tomorrow figure out how to put my head on a new body, I'll be back to take control of my company. I'll also punch Eisner in the throat, hug John Lasseter, clone my dear wife Lillian and keep dreaming of the past, the future, and all the little People-movers in-between.

My Interests

Trains, smoking, the hamburgers at the stagedoor cafe, and wild nature.

I'd like to meet:

A good doctor, Lillian's family- but I need $40 for a new suit.

Music:

Tchaiskovsky, Bach, Stravinsky, Schubert, Beethoven, Mozart, Saint-Saens, Tommy Dorsey, Annette Funicello, Polk Miller's Old South Quartet, The Buffalo Bills, Billy Murray and the Haydn Quartet, Louis Armstrong, Jelly Roll Morton, Sugar Johnny- you know- real music.

Movies:

Enchanted, Bambi, Dumbo, Fantasia, Steam Boat Willie, Plane Crazy, Snow White and the Seven Dwarves, the computer superhero one, that monster movie with the kid, Mary Poppins. I've never been truly happy with any cartoon I've ever made. Alice in Wonderland is an especially flawed creation. Frank and Ollie made a movie about how I made all the cartoons that was pretty nice. I borrowed it from netflix.

Television:

I don't especially enjoy being in front of a camera or watching myself on the television, but you probably love watching me. Your favorite shows are Disneyland, The Wonderful World of Color, Zorro's gay blade, the Davey Crockett show, Mickey Mouse's Club- all on ABC last time I checked.

Books:

Disney War, Peter Pan, Alice in Wonderland, Grimms Fairy Tales, Don Quixote, Storming the Magic Kingdom: Wall Street, the Raiders and the Battle for Disney.

Heroes:

Charlie Chaplin, Abraham Lincoln, Davy Crockett, Richard Trevithick, Mickey Mouse, Walt Fucking Disney

My Blog

We allow no geniuses in our studio, except this one

There used to be Nine Old Men. I called them old men even when they were young, and now the nine are no more. Ollie Johnston, the last of Disney's nine core animators passed away yesterday at the ripe...
Posted by walt disney's cryogenically frozen head on Tue, 15 Apr 2008 12:03:00 PST

and how!

Hello everyone. I just spent another lonely evening watching television. I sat through Ghostbusters 2 for the hundredth time. After this many viewings, I am still try to figure out who they thought th...
Posted by walt disney's cryogenically frozen head on Sat, 21 Apr 2007 01:26:00 PST

Unfrozen Records of My Statements

[ROBERT E.] STRIPLING [CHIEF INVESTIGATOR]: Mr. Disney, will you stateyour full name and present address, please? WALTER DISNEY: Walter E. Disney, Los Angeles, California. RES: When and where were you...
Posted by walt disney's cryogenically frozen head on Fri, 02 Jun 2006 06:09:00 PST

Walt Disney's Cryogenically Frozen Headache

Other than my secret nightly walks on the campus given to me by the lab assistant Brad (who knows just about everything there is to know about me thanks to that jabbering poo-poo mouth of mine!), I do...
Posted by walt disney's cryogenically frozen head on Wed, 31 May 2006 11:55:00 PST

the frozen head speaks!

Inside every sophisticated grownup adult is a little kid just dying to get out. Yeah, and inside every cryogenic storage unit is a frozen head dying to get out. Well, good luck to both of us, bro...
Posted by walt disney's cryogenically frozen head on Mon, 21 Nov 2005 05:57:00 PST

Official Frozen Quote of the Week No.6

I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I've ever known. Well, I mean...Don't take that the wrong way, people. I'm not gay or anything, I'm just trying to say that..Mickey makes me feel so good about ...
Posted by walt disney's cryogenically frozen head on Sun, 23 Oct 2005 11:17:00 PST

quote of the week no. 5

"To all that come to this happy place: welcome. Disneyland is your land. Here age relives fond memories of the past, and here youth may savor the challenge and promise of the future. Disneyland is ded...
Posted by walt disney's cryogenically frozen head on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

quote of the week No. 4

Actually, if you could see close in my eyes, the American flag is waving in both of them and up my spine is growing this red, white and blue stripe. Really, its kind of creepy, this thing growing on w...
Posted by walt disney's cryogenically frozen head on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Quote of the Week No. 3

Laughter is America's most important export. I sure wish we could import some scientists who knew how unfreeze a head and put it on a healthy body, though. Happy Independence Day? What ...
Posted by walt disney's cryogenically frozen head on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

quote of the week no.2

Of all the things I have done, the most vital is coordinating the talents of those who work for us and pointing them towards a certain goal; getting me out of this damned head-freezing contraption....
Posted by walt disney's cryogenically frozen head on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST