I'm interested in and working on becoming the first Black female full-time correspondent for The Daily Show. This is only until I am able to Executively Produce my own spin-off show.
If I'm not interested in it, I'll let you know. I'm an openminded individual with the capability of discussion. My favorite topics are Astronomy, Food, Technology and Personal Hygiene. Catch me on a good day and I'll paint your nails.
I love animals. I have six pets: a marmalade tabby, two cockatiels and three hamsters. I don't have a pic of my new hamsters yet. In the meanwhile, play with this one:
adopt your own virtual pet!
I'm always up for text messages, but if you want a message back, send your number. Otherwise, you'll think I'm ignoring you.
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Well one day I'll meet God. I believe God will welcome me with open arms, serve Pesto Chicken with Pine Nuts from Maggianos and talk about the good ol' days that involved my life span. I wonder if God would let me borrow his computer so I can update this profile and my website.
Next in line: Stephen Colbert, Jon Stewart, Steve Carell, John Oliver, Anderson Cooper and Al Gore. Don't ask and I won't have to kill you when I'm done telling.
I would like to meet every celebrity possible, even the ones I don't know. I just think it would be entertaining to see celebrities hanging out like regular people: some playing poker in the corner, others fumbling with the Tivo controls and someone peeing on the floor instead of hitting the toilet. Of course they would have to clean that up. There is no dress code, but I prefer a dark grey tshirt and some blue jeans. I wear sandals, but barefooting is in my nature, too. By the way ... I do cook, so eats are on me.
There will be no networking, no sneaking off to other parts of the house and especially NO ILLEGAL SUBSTANCES. I do not mix drinks because I do not believe in contaminating the molecules of Scotch. Also, I drink stuff that no one raps about. Feel free to bring your own and to use my blender. There will be no chasing of the feline entity, no rolling the hamster entity down the stairs in his habitat ball and no teaching the avian entity to say curse words. In fact I hope he pecks your eyes out if you do.
If you can't make it to my place, I am available to travel to prove the existence of freckles on black people. Also, feel free to contact me on Yahoo(as guess who? 2 points if you said Xcesiv4ce) and I'll turn on my cam to let you see my freckles. If you decide on Yahoo, please identify yourself and where you are from. Otherwise, you will find out how I got the name Xcesiv4ce.
My Pea Shooters of Liberty!
I have a squadron of flying monkeys.
This Space is Reserved for Stephen Colbert
Stephen accepts sloppy seconds if he had firsts!
Stephen Claims The First 3 Spaces in the Name of Truthiness!
Jon Decided That He Wanted In On This Action, Too
Hey guys, I think our cousin is crazy.
You said it, Riah. I knew it all along.
Whatever, Marc, you had no clue.
I'm older, you three. I knew before ya'll did.
Jon laughs in your face Stephen cause he's first on this row!
Stephen says Jon is getting me in trouble by taking that space.
Stephen nominates that I create a church in his honor.
Stephen proposes a road leading away from Rome, but to him instead.
Stephen surveys the property before drawing up plans
Stephen thinks this site needs more .. Je ne se Colbert.
Stephen notices there's enough of him to go around.
Stephen tagz my site with STEPHEN WUZ HERE
Jon thinks Stephen needs to calm down on my site.
Stephen tells Jon to mind his own business about what goes on in my site.
Jon threatens Stephen with a bagel and a silly face.
Son-of-a-Bitch, says Lewis. I almost missed this!
Anderson chuckles at those silly fake news reporters.
Steve tells Anderson to SHUT UP or get a knuckle sandwich
Jeremy says, LET'S HUG IT OUT YOU LITTLE BITCHES
Geraldo says Both of them are destroying America.
Val pulls off Geraldo's mustache for talking about Colbert.
Auntie puts $50 on Colbert and $25 on Stewart.
Jake asks for the odds on this fight.
EJ puts $75 on Stewart vs. Colbert and $50 on Val vs. Geraldo.
I thought I was the only EJ ...
She likes me better ... Dontcha X?
She uses me when she makes her black and tan.
Don't forget, I'm on top, Bass.
Stop Fighting. I, Martini, am the favorite drink.
Someone's gonna get hungry
I heard that, sausage! I got your back.
Someone's bound to get hurt. We're here to help!
Those other drinks know they wouldn't be anything without me.
I know you all, but if you need guidance, God is listening.
I only want the movie rights to this chick's head.
I call dibs on directing this film and O-ring special effects!
I just want her to stop talking in my class. :)
You should have heard her when she was on Yahoo
She always did that dirty talk on the mic. She's dirty.
She was Chipper like a fresh lacy coffin.
She's highly unstable.
I heard she still had the hots for me.
Get real, Al. I would've had her first.
Forget it, you two. She may be blue, but Georgia is a Red State.
You still got my glove, X?
Georgia, you'd better watch your back!
Why do you two fight, Georgia and South Carolina?
They don't realized we had her first.
She travels me everyday to get to work.
I heard you guys were betting ...
Classical, Jazz, Big Band, Oldies (50's 60's), old school rap and hip hop. If it sounds intelligently worthy, I'll listen.
My favorite music video so far (Some people say it's racist, but it's not. It's the ones that this video hits home to that get offended.):
God knows why Tommy Lee Jones isn't on Myspace, but I love the guy.
Science Fiction is my heart ... but they took Firefly off the air and I'm FRIGGING MAD! I will never find my Captain Mal ... *sniff*
I love movies in general. I've always wanted to be a screenwriter. I just never had the inspiration as I do now. Even if the movie isn't that great, I love it because of the time and effort put into it. If it didn't do well, it's everyone's fault. TEAMWORK *avoids getting hit with a rotten tomato*
Shows that make me laugh! The Colbert Report and The Daily Show! MMMM A Colbert-Stewart Sandwich ... Ok maybe not, but they are my two favorite people in the world!
I would like to be on television myself, preferably as the Black correspondent of The Daily Show. I prefer television over film because of the scheduling.
Anything that has nothing to do with reality. I don't watch many TV shows. I'm waiting for CSI: Atlanta
I guess since I've requested to add to a lot of celebrities that I rarely even talk to, I guess I better start watching your show. Come to think of it ... the celebs that I do get the honor of conversation from don't talk about their careers.
TEXTBOOKS
Biblical Characters, Anyone trying to save the Earth from "Imminent Domain" and people who genuinely give a shit. There are not a lot of caring people out there.
I've found that we are very selfish indeed with our tank size SUV's although you have 1.5 kids that cut me off because you're on the cellphone while putting on your make-up looking for a clue only to realize that this is your exit. Common sense has escaped the planet and I blame everyone.
The true solution to a problem: YOU.People always complain that our government isn't doing enough. Well, are yu doing enough to make your government do enough? Stop waiting for someone else to take care of you and others. You won't be written down in history if you're sitting on your ass.