COLONEL J.D. profile picture

COLONEL J.D.

Awaiting my painful KFC debeaking

About Me



I'm the frontman/blues-harpist for the Bible Belt rock 'n roll band Legendary Shack*Shakers. I paint sideshow-style banners and draw the comic strip "Head Cheese" (buried on the back page of the Nashville Rage each week.) See more at http://www.jdwilkes.com

I'm a Kentucky Colonel, an honor bestowed upon me by the Commonwealth's governor for "contributions" to Kentucky culture and art. Not sure if he's ever actually seen what it is I do though. Yipes!

I'm also a nerd about all manner of C.B. and Ham Radio stuff. I was once busted by the F.C.C. for running a pirate radio station outta my basement. So pretty much if it grates, hisses, grinds, whistles, whirs &/or is otherwise unlistenable, I'm into it (Read: scratchy 78s, broken P.A.s, auctioneers, freight trains and old bullet mikes. Yesiree Bob.) .. width="425" height="350" ..

My Interests

Underground comix, outsider art, and lo-fi music. Kentucky history and folklore. Pirate Radio and C.B. radio stuff too.

I'd like to meet:

Cross-eyed, inbred Faulknerian idiot manchildren with slump shoulders, hammertoes & well-pronounced Adam's Apples who clog, yodel, chew on wheatstraws and whittle on soap. Jimbly-leg dolls, Alabama haints, Hoofenaugers, White Thang, snake-handlers and/or anyone afflicted with a festering mumblypeg scar gone bad. Folks so ugly they gotta wear an onion sack over their head, with the "O"s in "ONIONS" cut out for eye-holes. With teeth so buck, eat an apple through a split-picket fence! Knock-kneed, slope-headed, freckleface hill-people with pink eyes, cleft palates, Andy Gump chins and corn growing outta their flared-ass ears. Folks I'd love to call "family."
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Music:

Dock Boggs, Roscoe Holcombe, B.F. Shelton, Lee Sexton, Buell Kazee, Stanley Brothers, Howlin' Wolf, Muddy Waters, Tom Waits, James Harman, Sonny Boy Williamson(s), Magic Sam, Professor Longhair, Washboard Sam, Jimmy Martin, Louvin Brothers, Jerry Lee Lewis, Roy Hogshed, Charlie Feathers, Johnny Burnett Trio. Ennio Morricone, Danny Elfman, Nino Rota. 16 Horsepower, Slim Cessna, Munly, Dex Romweber, Pine Hill Haints, Crazyhearse. Kaizers Orchestra, Fanfare Ciocarlia, Taraf de Haidouks, Mickey Katz.

Movies:

Pee Wee's Big Adventure, Slingblade, The Good the Bad and the Ugly, The 'Burbs, Waiting for Guffman, Falling Down, American Splendor, Crumb, Forbidden Zone, Marjoe, If Footmen Tire You What Will Horses Do?, Athens GA Inside Out, Vernon Florida, Boggy Creek, Bozo Texino.

Television:

Ren and Stimpy, King of the Hill, The Simpsons, Conan and Dave, Andy Griffith, "Fabulous Fleisher" Popeye shorts.

Books:

Kentucky Atlas and Gazetteer, The Bell Witch, Wise Blood, Ghosts Along the Cumberland, Murder in Old Kentucky, Offbeat Kentuckians.

Heroes:

Snap Wyatt, Jack Cripe, Fred Johnson and Joe Coleman.

My Blog

SEVEN SIGNS TEASER ONLINE NOW!

Colonel J.D. Wilkes (frontman for th' Legendary Shack*Shakers) is proud to announce the arrival of an online film teaser for his upcoming, southern documentary "Seven Signs"...now posted at http://jdw...
Posted by COLONEL J.D. on Tue, 09 Jan 2007 08:51:00 PST

My Beard...Screw THAT.

I shaved my beard off. I gathered the courage after deliberating and praying over it for days. The urge finally came in the middle of the night, after hours of restless writhing and scratching. As ...
Posted by COLONEL J.D. on Fri, 03 Nov 2006 07:30:00 PST

My Beard...Why?

Help me! I've gone and grown myself a big, red, Amish beard for no particularly good reason at all! What the hell am I doing? I think I've lost my mind!I look like Bocephus (post-faceplant-off-a-cl...
Posted by COLONEL J.D. on Wed, 27 Sep 2006 03:41:00 PST

Seven Signs Movie Teaser online at Staythirsty.com

Check out the new Seven Signs teaser clip featuring an audio interview with yours truly, Colonel JD at STAYTHIRSTY.COMStayThirsty.com is a terrific arts, culture & music magazine, whose writers were k...
Posted by COLONEL J.D. on Wed, 04 Oct 2006 01:20:00 PST

SEVEN SIGNS movie a GO! (press release)

Possessed by a vision similar to that of the tent-show evangelists down in Dixie, Colonel J.D. Wilkes (the charismatic frontman and songwriter for the Legendary Shack*Shakers) sets off with a camera c...
Posted by COLONEL J.D. on Thu, 03 Aug 2006 10:28:00 PST

ICHABOD VIDEO ON YOUTUBE.COM

Check it out!Many thanks to all who contributed...including but not limited to: Todd Tue, Jay McDowell and Bergen Student TV!http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KbODVOMDOew&search=SHACK SHAKERS.. width="42...
Posted by COLONEL J.D. on Sat, 24 Jun 2006 07:13:00 PST

Searching for the Wrong-Eyed Plotline

All right, I DID it. I finally broke down and gave in to your demands. I went and got a copy of the Southern-fried psuedo-documentary "Searching For The Wrong-Eyed Jesus." "You'll LOVE it," you tol...
Posted by COLONEL J.D. on Fri, 16 Jun 2006 07:07:00 PST

God and Gnomes

I was recently asked a rather disarming question by a certain Norwegian "Doubting Thomas", a question I wasn't prepared to answer amongst the din of my usual, latenight post-show environs. It went som...
Posted by COLONEL J.D. on Sat, 13 May 2006 06:02:00 PST