Action Image Exchange, Aromatherapy, bad booze-brisket-biscuit and brine, Glen Mitchell, Morissey the Consumer Monkey, Nibbles the Comedy Duck, Foul Mouthed Fox, humiliating Graham Lister the sex-criminal, sentencing heinous criminals (to fitting punishments)with Judge Lional Nutmeg, squeezing lemon juice into Les' eyes, Les's luncheon club, Novelty Island, marzipan, nougat, kilroy,
The rat that keeps sneaking into my bowls of cereal. Ohhh i'll get him one day.Let me relive that terrible day for you now.
Diary Entry - Jan 15th.
Do you remember the Bubonic Plague or "BLACK DEATH"? Well it came from RATS!
Remembering this fact, i grew wary of a rat i discovered in my Ricicles and examined it with my eyeglass as it gently lapped up the milk that held the Ricicles in semi-suspension. I noticed that the rat was smooth, with a large, oval head and a thin tapered body.
After a few hours' examination i grabbed the rat, withdrew it from my now soggy Ricicles and hurled it out of the window on to the midden, where it lay dormant and silent, never moving again.
The Rat i saw in my Ricicles:
Excerpt from Vic Reeves' book Sunboiled Onions.
A nifty read, i must say!
I like Elvis. You know his glossy hair was grown all by himself? He also had spinal irregularities. Morrissey thinks about his tiling too much for my liking.
The Canon & Ball. Harry Hill. Morcambe & Wise. Watch out for Eric when he's in a bad mood! Run back to your house, unlock the padlock on your front door & HIDE. Anywhere you can, for Eric is fuming and it's you he's after.
Sun Boiled Onions is a good'un by a long chalk.It was MY idea.
Elvis "I'm off down the shops" Presley, Eric "Black glove" Morcambe.