Lilibeth Helson - ProfilesArchive

About Me

I an upcoming comedian. Im a singer, actress, poet, lover, Kung Fu Master, songwriter, rejuvinator, a groove boppin hip hoppin member of the "Get Fresh Down There Female Crew, counselor, chef, I'm wonderful, Christian member of Bell Chappell CME church but hasn't gone in awhile, motivator, realist, monogamous freaknasty Master of Cuum LadaDaddypies body penis cordinator in the bedroom facilitator, I'm a translator of love, I'm a fighter, cockblocker, tresspassor, mental therapist, Sexual Therapist of Daddypies a.k.a Alfonso Allensworth, hairdresser, distractor of footballgames/basketball games, homemaker, did I say Upcoming Comedian......yes I did. I'm a femanist when needed be, a down to earth judgemental tell it to yo face expressor, auntie, friendly neighborhood nosy ass peeper tom, future grandama of the year 2030, traveler, hiker of bay area cutty trails, water consumer, Dancer, Gym member of Total Bally Fitness (salsa classes every saturday yo!) Mother of two sons and a step son who lie so damn much ima bout to bestow upon him motherly love to which he has never eva eva experienced, sharer of laughter, realistic loud ass mama, Health Exams Representative of EMSI, coworker, sister, cousin, anti-social crazy issues having bitch, irritator of children, did I say Comedian......yes I did. I'm a crazy, sexy, cool ass bitch from around the way, Entertainer, sewer, crochet queen, make up artist, Artist, painter, lover of Nature, explorer, Prince and Tupac fan, dramatic ass stand up comedian....I said that already, palm reader, family oriented future spouse of Daddypies, blues singer, choir member of Bell Chapell who misses church cuz she a sinner from birth, spiritualist, Barbecue Chips Fan, gravitator to positive energy maker, passionist of love making at various hotels with her lovebuddy for life partner Daddypies cuz he so sweeeeeeeeet, mandator of the household, tax payer, Secretary of Mayor Daddypies, vacation camper, swimmer of lakes, pools and rivers, Star Gazer, spooner of Daddypies, Sheakspere fan, like to go camping to sleep under the stars hoe, crazy midget coworker of other coworker, baker, gardener when the plants live, herbalist on special holidays and funtions, non alcoholic beverage drinker, dedicator of life, love, and happiness. Oh! and I love peanut butter jelly samiches YO!

My Interests

I like walks on the beach, kite flying, horse back ridin, Broke Back Mountain climbing(once a year atleast) and road trips to Oakland ta see wildlife in its rarest form. I love doin comedy. I love spending time with my family. First comes Family then comes comedy. I likes to go hiking along trails and discover new territories for me and Dadpies to snuggle. There's cutties all over this great big city for me and my partner to discover. One of these days I will create a map for people who like visiting the cutties. When you find a cutty you can smoke a reefer, eat snacks, and make out with the love of yo life. I'm am totally interested in laughing. I'm always laughing with the people I love. I love to make them laugh and I love to feed them home cooked meals just to see the looks on their faces.

I'd like to meet:

I'D LIKE TO MEET BILLIE HOLIDAY CUZ SHE WAZ HELLA TIGHT. I'D LIKE TO MEET THE WOMAN WHO SANG THE BLUES CUZ ALL MY LIFE I'VE SUNG MIDGET BLUES. I USED TO BE SAD ABOUT MY DISABILITY BUT WHEN I SING THE BLUES I FEELS LIKE A TALL LEAN STRING BEAN MOTHA FUCKA. I WOULD ALSO LIKE TO MEET ALL THE FUNNIEST PEOPLE IN THE WORLD SO WE CAN GET TOGETHER AND LAUGH AND SMOKE WEED AND EAT SNACKS.

Music:

I love the sound of Music!

Movies:

I love going to the movies.

Television:

I love wanting to watch television.

Books:

I edited my profile at Freeweblayouts.net , check out these Myspace Layouts!

Heroes:

My fiance Alfonso Allensworth is my Hero. He makes me laugh no matter what's goin on. He bakes me cookies, rubs my feet, and saves me from the evil that swarms this Big Sucka Free city. He's square but is a thug in areas that's really non yo bidness. My hero loves me thru thick and thin no matter how much of a bitch ass baby i can be. Sometimes he get's on my nerves cuz he a old ass black man. I have to carry his walker all over the place. Sometimes I rub icy hot on his balls to get him started. He likes that and I'm willing to cordinate the efforts of making him comfortable 100% because I love him hella much. His knees are bad and he knows when it's gonna rain with that bad knee which is useful information I must say. but it's all good cuz the athritis acts up only in the winter and I don't mind warming him up cuz that's pretty much what I do for a living. I love my Hero a.k.a. Daddypies. I can't wait to see him after work. My favorite time of the day is bedtime spooning with my Hero Daddypies. mmmm. I loves me some Daddypies. He the sweetest thang. mmmm. Like Pie. Sweet Potato Pie. Yummy!