Army of Peeps! - ProfilesArchive

About Me

I enjoy hanging out with my four best pals. You might say we're joined at the hip, but that's not really true. We don't really have hips. Some people prefer me fresh; others prefer me after I've been around for a while.

YOUR CURRENT SECRET AGENT ASSIGNMENT - 25 April 2008

We have word that Dr. Zamboni is building a weather machine in the mountains of Slovakia. Take the next flight to Bratislava and make your way across the country disguised as a sheep merchant. Then infiltrate Zamboni's secret fortress in Kysla and destroy that machine! Be certain to think of (and say) a cool catch phrase before blowing up the fortress.

My Interests

Easter. That fake plastic grass. Eggs. Chocolate. Bunnies. Mass-production. Baskets.

I'd like to meet:

People who won't torture me by putting me in the microwave. Yeah, I get real big. It's not funny, OK? Maybe for you, but the comedown is very, very harsh.

Peeps like St. Patty's Day!

more cat pictures

Music:

Everything sounds better with Peeps. Why don't emo kids sing about going to the store and finding out that the Peeps are sold out? Forget the ex-girlfriends... having no Peeps is something really worth crying over.

Artist of the moment:
Johnathan Coulton

This guy is hilarious. Songs about reasonable zombies, lonely evil masterminds, and code monkeys? You betcha!

Artist of a moment ago:
Richard Thompson

Take a guy and a guitar, mix in some incredible talent and some fantastic songwriting, bake at 350 for two hours. Serves 300 million.

Artist of, like, forever:
Kay Hanley

I heart Kay Hanley.

Also, check this out! That Jaimie is ne awesome singer!

Movies:

Monster movies... not all monsters are inhuman.

Television:

TV show of the moment:
Dood, Lost is on! Turn out the lights and lock the kitten in the bathroom, because it's island time, my friends!

TV show of a moment ago:
Sad to say, but 24 has been pushed back to January 2009. The hell? I don't know if I can wait that long... I may have to start screaming at people, Kiefer-style, just to pass the time until it returns.

TV show that's, like, gone forever:
I don't know about you, but I think this year's episodes of Veronica Mars are just terrible.

Books:

The Zombie Survival Guide . A brilliant spoof of both zombie movies and survival guides. What's the deal with the undead? How do you kill them? What's the best weapon? Where should you hole up when the big invasion takes place? Remember: tear down your staircase!

"Titanic and the Mystery Ship." Because you can never have too many books about the Big T.

"Catch-22." It's a tough read at the start, but builds and builds upon itself in a very nice fashion. It's also a strange book in that, given today's sepia-toned nostalgia surrounding World War II, it has a much darker story to tell.

"The Boys from Joes." In 1929, the basketball team from tiny Joes, Colorado won the state championship. At the time, Joes HS had a total enrollment of 36. The ten players practiced early in the morning, before school and after farm chores, on a court outside the school (Joes had no gym). Their coach was also a teacher, the school principal, and the band leader, and had never played a single game of basketball- everything he knew about the game came from a book he ordered through a mail-order catalog.

Heroes:

Today, my friend Jaimie is my hero.

My Blog

Run-On Sentence Movie Review Presents: Sex and the City

Sex and the City is based on the TV show of the same name and stars Sarah Jessica Parker, Kristin Davis, Cynthia Nixon, and Kim Cattrall, who was also in Big Trouble in Little China, which was a prett...
Posted by Army of Peeps! on Fri, 06 Jun 2008 07:28:00 PST

500 Bloggy Blogs

Warning! Race lingoRandom race thoughts.Opening moments: Okay, that was the worst rendition of the National Anthem I've heard in a long time. Rosanne Barr is covering her ears right now. Next time t...
Posted by Army of Peeps! on Mon, 26 May 2008 06:35:00 PST

Dammit

It got the mill. It took the *&^* mill!!!!Oh, that's heartbreaking. All of that work, all of that planning... gone. It got the mill.....
Posted by Army of Peeps! on Fri, 23 May 2008 12:00:00 PST

Inferno

I had a strange dream last night, and it inspired me to write for a bit."We're here," he announced, pulling up sharply. It was still pitch black, even though my watch read twelve minutes past seven. ...
Posted by Army of Peeps! on Wed, 21 May 2008 10:06:00 PST

Limbo through Limbo

I had a dream last night that I was in Limbo, the afterlife of the not-quite-good-enough and the not-quite-bad-enough. There was a Starbucks there- I guess there's a Starbucks everywhere these d...
Posted by Army of Peeps! on Tue, 20 May 2008 09:36:00 PST

On the Road: Denver, 1947

A historical photoblogIn July of 1947 Jack Kerouac left New York City on a Trailways bus bound for Chicago, Denver, and San Francisco, planting the seeds of what would eventually grow to become his fa...
Posted by Army of Peeps! on Thu, 08 May 2008 11:45:00 PST

There Was Also a Man From Seattle

Bad poetry corner continuesThere was also a man from SeattleWho took a strange liking to cattleThough soon on the runHe did have his funBut the bulls were a whole different battle...
Posted by Army of Peeps! on Wed, 07 May 2008 09:14:00 PST

There Once Was a Man from Nantucket

today's awful poem...There once was a man from NantucketWho took a short trip to PawtucketWhen he saw what was thereAnd he smelled the foul airHe thought that he'd done kicked the bucket....
Posted by Army of Peeps! on Wed, 07 May 2008 09:08:00 PST

Speaking of crazy

Bunch of noise outside, go out to balcony to see what's up. Turns out there's a line of people circling the Barnes & Noble/GameStop building down the way. They must be there to pick up a copy of Gra...
Posted by Army of Peeps! on Tue, 29 Apr 2008 11:08:00 PST

And now, a message from my brain

YAAABOOOO TEEEBOOOOBAAAAH WOOOOOOO HEE HAAAA YAAAA BLEEEEEEEBLOOO Horse brew pink cup gate farm goat, pumpin juice bag orange mellow woot dragon sauce.Thunder ear biscuit chew! Palomino wh...
Posted by Army of Peeps! on Mon, 28 Apr 2008 02:15:00 PST