Deathcat - ProfilesArchive

About Me

DEATHCAT
Commander in Chief
I'm a five year old tabby who enjoys killing things. All things. Any things. Living things. Non-living things. I don't care. Let me at it. I'm awesome. Evisceration is my specialty, bloodlust my first love...
My intellect is superior, my cunning unequaled, my talents extraordinary.
I REIGN SUPREME....
THE THRILL KILL BRIGADE
An assemblage of warriors that would put the United States Marine Corps to shame. We are the NSA, the CIA, NASA and the Manson Family combined.
BLOODTHIRSTY? WANT TO JOIN?
We got cats. We got dogs. We got Ninjas. We got bikers. We got guerrilla pimps and desperate housewives. We got Ben, with his army of rats. We got a binturong, whatever the hell that is.
Bitches, we got Walter Sobchak.
Fuck with THAT.
So, in case you can't fucking tell, ALL RECRUITS ARE WELCOME, regardless of age, species, gender, blahda blahda blahda, yadda yadda...
BUT this is NO FUCKING PLACE for cute, fuzzy innocents. WE ARE PREPARING FOR WORLD DOMINATION (Or, at the very least, some serious fucking havoc-wreaking at the expense of our humans...). If you are not bloodthirsty, vicious and nasty, go home, and YOU SAW NOTHING.
And if you can't handle some industrial-strength language, Heaven help you...
In association with:
The Black Cat Crew
The Mean Street Mafia
Legal Representation by:
Orange & Orange
Attorneys at Paw
NOW READ MY MOTHERFUCKING BLOG!!!

My Interests

Killing. Eating. Sleeping. Socks. Climbing doorjambs. Smackin' my bitch around. Hissing at everybody and being generally conceited and nasty.
SOME OF MY FAVORITE TARGETS:

I'd like to meet:

People with a wicked sense of humor who like to kill.

Music:

DEATH METAL, THRASH METAL, BLACK METAL, ANYTHING FAST AND EXTREME THAT I CAN KILL TO. Oh, and Simon and Garfunkel.

Movies:

Last House on the Left. Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer.

Television:

None.

Books:

Sun Tzu's "The Art of War."

Heroes:

Oh, I don't know... Hitler was so small minded, I mean, one race? Why not all of them? Mussolini, Stalin...Hussein...Bush...I can't say any of these are worthy of my adoration. Many try, few succeed.

My Blog

Captchas

FUCK 'EM.
Posted by Deathcat on Sun, 29 Jun 2008 09:34:00 PST

I get NO fuckin respect....

I'm in the bedroom. On the bed. I AM SLEEPING.SLEEPING, mind you. And what the fuck do they do? THEM MOTHERFUCKERS COME MARCHING RIGHT IN AND START DOING THE FUCKIN' NASTY RIGHT THERE BESIDE ME.ON the...
Posted by Deathcat on Thu, 24 Apr 2008 05:01:00 PST

MINE

Oh no. NO, no,no, NO no no.So I’m sharpenin’ my claws, right? On the rug of course, cause that’s what the shit is there for, right? Right. EVERY fuckin’ body knows this. So gue...
Posted by Deathcat on Sat, 15 Mar 2008 11:17:00 PST

Oh, hell...

I AM SO MOTHERFUCKING, COCKSUCKING, SONOFABITCHING BORED IT'S FUCKING SICK.Just thought I'd let y'all know.
Posted by Deathcat on Mon, 10 Mar 2008 08:25:00 PST

Christmas Poem 2007 or "I LOVE SANTA"

"I LOVE SANTA"by DeathcatHumans are away,cats left home to playon this, the eve of Christmas dayI'm plannin' the nightpolished claws, nice and brighteyes on the skywaitin' on that beautiful sight....F...
Posted by Deathcat on Tue, 25 Dec 2007 04:27:00 PST

"Vacation"

Can y'all believe this shit? These stupid motherfucking humans know damn fucking well that I can't fucking type. Been tryin' to get online for, what? A fucking WEEK now, and what? Do you think they're...
Posted by Deathcat on Mon, 15 Oct 2007 06:55:00 PST

Who the hell are YOU?????

Okay, so I'm hanging out chillin the other day, right? And the female human decides she wants to fucking play, or cuddle, or what-ever-the-fuck she's fucking thinking, right? So the bitch picks me up,...
Posted by Deathcat on Fri, 17 Aug 2007 03:40:00 PST

A Spelling Lesson.

I start off my lesson today with an explanation, for the benefit of those who ask, of why I don't blog more often. Let us begin:I am the shiznit. That's S-H-I-Z-N-I-T. As in, the ROYAL shiznit. The ro...
Posted by Deathcat on Sun, 20 May 2007 08:56:00 PST

HOW TO KILL A HUMAN IN THREE EASY STEPS (illustrated)

Step 1: ACQUIRE PREY. This is most easily done by sneaking up and leaping from behind. Don't forget your war cry!Step 2: Once prey has been acquired, dig in with claws (hold tight!) and CHOMP as hard ...
Posted by Deathcat on Sat, 10 Mar 2007 03:16:00 PST

MOTHERFUCKING COCKSUCKING SON-OF-A-BITCHING (THIS ONES JUST PLAIN MEAN)

WHAT THE FUCK????? I live on the very edge of my fucking internet provider's service area (I get broadband). For nine motherslickin' months, this has not been a problem I've always been able to...
Posted by Deathcat on Sat, 27 Jan 2007 06:34:00 PST