Pretty Little Mistakes - ProfilesArchive

About Me

So I lay awake at night a lot and wonder if I've made the right choices with my life. I'm just your typical neurotic writer that way. I wrote this book called Pretty Little Mistakes, which has over a 150 endings. On the first page it's the last day of high school - and you have to decide if you go to college or travel. Then you flip to that page, read that section and go on from there.You can end up as a millionaire or homeless by the river. Stuck in a sex cult or an happy marriage. You might become a movie star, a bored housewife, an art thief, a witch, an evil chocolate maker, a murderer, a homicide victim, a Jamaican drug dealer, a porn star, a devout Christian, an Italian shoe designer, a volcanologist, a bar wench, a news reporter, or an orchid farmer. You might end up having accidental sex with a monkey. (It happens.)I'm not even kidding. These are just some of the things that might happen to you in my book.you travel the world. you join a sex cult. You kill your rapist. you have an abortion. you don't have an abortion. you find the love of your life. you don't find the love of your life. you find out you are gay. you find out you are not gay. you have lovely children. you have monster children. you are killed by sharks. you are killed by choking on a peach pit. you die in your sleep. you die in a car crash. you go to heaven and God is a woman who smokes cigars. you go to heaven and God is a squid. you go to heaven, which is a library filled with answers. you go to heaven, which is this world in reverse. you go to hell, and watch your own personal blooper reel. you go to hell, which is the Mall of America.So I'm just warning you. The book isn't for everybody. But if you're feeling frisky, order it on Amazon.com!www.prettylittlemistakes.com

My Interests

Mistakes, disasters, bad decisions and fiascos. All sizes, all shapes and all consequences.

I'd like to meet:

Bad girls. Bad boys. Mistake Makers. People who have fallen down, messed up, ruined everything and still can't figure it out. The guy who breaks down in rush hour traffic. The kid who vomits during the school play. Mrs. O'Leary's cow...The woman who first imported dandelions from England because they were "pretty", The engineer who first drew up plans for the Brooklyn Bridge five feet too short, whoever comandeered the "Clear Coke" campaign.Anyone who had good intentions but bad execution. Whoever designed tube tops or Skorts. Anyone who can be described as A few clowns short of a circus or is proof that evolution can go in reverse.You know the type. The wheel's spinning, but the hamster's dead. Zats ma peeps.

Music:

The Soundtrack to Jaws. A good sixteenth century funeral dirge. Anything Ominous.

Movies:

The Posedion Adventure, The Towering Inferno, The Andromeda Strain, The Abyss, Avalanche, Backdraft, The Burning Bed, The Hindenberg Project, Dawn of the dead, Sean of the Dead, The Killer Bees, Meteorites! Freaky Friday, The Titanic etc...

Books:

hmmmm, Mine might not suck too bad...Pretty little Mistakes - out in March 07, published by HarperCollins.

Heroes:

Create your own visitor map!

My Blog

Suicide Girl Ana

Suicide Girl Ana Likes Pretty Little Mistakes! I am on a one of the Suicide Girl's "favorite books" list. Ok, I'm 10, out of 10, but it's still an accomplishment. I have to say, t...
Posted by Pretty Little Mistakes on Wed, 05 Sep 2007 08:01:00 PST

Man Killed by Pet Spider, Eaten by Creepy Crawlies

I saw an incredible spiderweb in our back yard, one of those "Charolotte Web" ones that look like engineering art. Upon further inspection I saw the creator of this web, an ENORMOUS brown Orb Weaver. ...
Posted by Pretty Little Mistakes on Fri, 31 Aug 2007 08:54:00 PST

if he can’t fuck your arm fat, don’t respond

I love Craiglist. Goddamit, this IS America. Operation Heavenly Hogpile - m4w Date: 2007-04-13, 4:13PM CDTCalling all BBWs and SSBBWs! Help make a dream come true! This is America, god damn...
Posted by Pretty Little Mistakes on Thu, 30 Aug 2007 04:23:00 PST

The most amazing thing of all time

It happened today. I always thought it might, that it was possible, and I never wanted to give up hope. Still. I knew the odds were against it. But today, for the first time in my life, my prin...
Posted by Pretty Little Mistakes on Fri, 24 Aug 2007 09:19:00 PST

lets hear it for the south.

Where you fall in poll of U.S. reading habits One in four Americans read no books last year More women are avid readers than men Southerners read more than rest of country Democrats, liberals read sl...
Posted by Pretty Little Mistakes on Wed, 22 Aug 2007 08:40:00 PST

This is a war with yourself and the only way to win is to show up every day ready to get bloody

Jason B, who posts "The Publishing Spot," did an interview with me and got some very non-schlocky answers out of me. You know when you do a book tour and eighty people ask you the same question, afte...
Posted by Pretty Little Mistakes on Wed, 15 Aug 2007 08:57:00 PST

Still Alive!

Hello my little ones! I have been hard at work, and lots has been happening. I've been writing, Walter got a life vest, Kiyoshi had a birthday and Christian quit his job! Now he's a big-t...
Posted by Pretty Little Mistakes on Sat, 11 Aug 2007 02:30:00 PST

Chewing tacks for fun

Hey all - sorry about this hiatus I'm taking, I have to crack out the next book mighty quick, and it's like chewing tacks in the sweltering sun while having someone serenade you with fingernails...
Posted by Pretty Little Mistakes on Tue, 24 Jul 2007 03:51:00 PST

missed connection story?

Hey guys, I'm doing a little research on craigslist "Missed Connections" page. Have you had any experiences with that good, bad or fugly? email me iffen you don't want to post. ...
Posted by Pretty Little Mistakes on Fri, 13 Jul 2007 11:05:00 PST

Pretty Little Mistakes reading tonight!

..> Come tonight! Tonight is my reading at the funky-cool-bowling-beer-house Bryant Lake Bowl for the Books-n-Bars club! I read to you while you drink! How fantastic does that soun...
Posted by Pretty Little Mistakes on Tue, 10 Jul 2007 08:39:00 PST