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Funny Indian

Indians Had Nothing To Do With 9-11 - Just 7-11.

About Me


TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Rajiv Satyal
Birthday: 3/7/1976
Birthplace: Hamilton, OH (25 min NW of Cincinnati)
Current Location: Los Angeles, CA
Eye Color: Brown
Hair Color: Black
Height: 5'7"
Right Handed or Left Handed: Right
Your Heritage: "Amurican"
The Shoes You Wore Today: ...Got my Vans on but they look like sneakers...
Your Weakness: "Eczema"
Your Fears: Turning 40, watching TV, thinking, "I coulda done that."
Your Perfect Pizza: LaRosa's
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: Sleep with Heidi Klum
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: ha yeah
Thoughts First Waking Up: "Just wakin' up in the mornin', gotta thank God..."
Your Best Physical Feature: Vas Deferens
Your Bedtime: When the big hand is over the little hand - oh, that's at Neverland.
Your Most Missed Memory: I don't recall.
Pepsi or Coke: Coke
MacDonalds or Burger King: You speled McDonald's wrong, douchebag. "I like the Whopper; [bleep] the Big Mac." "You see, they're MacDonald's. I'm McDowell's."
Single or Group Dates: Single dates leading to group sex
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: No one cares, dude.
Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate
Cappuccino or Coffee: Hot Chocolate
Do you Smoke: Strong anti-
Do you Swear: Does it put me in 2nd grade or 3rd to answer "f*** yeah"?
Do you Sing: Can't carry a tune in a bucket but I love karaoke like an Asian.
Do you Shower Daily: I shower the world with laughter.
Have you Been in Love: Yes.
Do you want to go to College: "I wanna go back (go back) and do it all over."
Do you want to get Married: Yes.
Do you belive in yourself: I'm not sure what "belive" is but "I only believe in me - Yoko and me."
Do you get Motion Sickness: In cars when I read but interestingly not when I'm sending an email while driving.
Do you think you are Attractive: I know I'm a sexpot. It's the Pinocchio nose and the Dumbo ears. How can you resist?
Are you a Health Freak: What's a health freak? Someone who loves carrots but must shove 'em up his ass first?
Do you get along with your Parents: "Well, if I say 'yes,' then I'm an idiot, right?"
Do you like Thunderstorms: Yes, I love all natural disasters.
Do you play an Instrument: Yes - the viola. And your mom.
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: No but I've drunk it.
In the past month have you Smoked: No - See above, dickmilk.
In the past month have you been on Drugs: Alcohol.
In the past month have you gone on a Date: No - "I'm a loser, baby..."
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: Like totally.
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: A BOX? I hope no one has eaten an entire box.
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: Yes - I had it today.
In the past month have you been on Stage: Yes.
In the past month have you been Dumped: No - I don't get dumped.
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: I weigh very little. So, if I partake of some Skoal, am I in?
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: A kiss.
Ever been Drunk: Love-drunk off your hump.
Ever been called a Tease: A flirt, but not a tease. Guys aren't teases any more than we can be skanks.
Ever been Beaten up: No. Ironically, I've beaten someone up.
Ever Shoplifted: No. Thou Shalt Not Steal. (I stole that from Moses.)
How do you want to Die: "The best that you can hope for is to die in your sleep."
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: Older.
What country would you most like to Visit: Screw other countries. I tole ya. I'm Amurican.
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: Pink. Oh, eyes. I don't know.
Favourite Hair Color: Are you a G-D Brit? What's up w/ your spelling? And aren't you supposed to have bad teeth but better grammar?
Short or Long Hair: Long - I'm a guy. C'mon.
Height: I love tall women.
Weight: Less than me - tough to find.
Best Clothing Style: Off.
Number of Drugs I have taken: Does Centrum count?
Number of CDs I own: 100 or so - not that many. Lots of mp3s, tho.
Number of Piercings: 0
Number of Tattoos: 0 - I know - I'm boring.
Number of things in my Past I Regret: 0 - See above answers to piercings and tattoos.
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!
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My Interests

Watching people parallel park. Untying complicated knots. Laughing as people lurch when the subway starts moving. Ogling Christina Ricci's rack.

I'd like to meet:

Anyone who can name 5 songs by Taylor Dayne without Google.

Music:

Whatever's on Your MySpace Page.

Movies:

Top 50 - Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, Airplane!, American Pie, Annie Hall, Back to the Future, Batman, The Blues Brothers, Braveheart, The Breakfast Club, The Bridge on the River Kwai, A Bronx Tale, The Bugs Bunny/Road Runner Movie, Caddyshack, Citizen Kane, Clue, Clueless, Coming to America, Dead Poets Society, Die Hard, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, A Few Good Men, Fight Club, Fletch, Forrest Gump, Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, The Godfather, The Godfather Part II, LA Confidential, Life Is Beautiful, The Lord of the Rings (3), My Cousin Vinny, The Naked Gun, Napoleon Dynamite, National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, National Lampoon's Vacation, Office Space, One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest, Quiz Show, Rain Man, Scent of a Woman, Schindler's List, Se7en, The Shawshank Redemption, The Silence of the Lambs, Spaceballs, Stand By Me, Swingers, Transformers: The Movie, The Usual Suspects, Waiting for Guffman, When Harry Met Sally.

Television:

Extras. Curb Your Enthusiasm. The Office. Entourage.

Books:

1. The Catcher in the Rye. 2. The Fountainhead. 3. How to Win Friends and Influence People. 4. The Inner Game of Tennis. 5. Superfudge.

Heroes:

Gandhi. C'mon - I'm Indian. This should already have been filled-in and grayed-out. (OK, really - My parents and brothers.)

My Blog

Check out my blog at www.funnyindian.com!

I'm not doing two blogs.  Check my site - www.funnyindian.com.  Thanks!
Posted by Funny Indian on Thu, 18 Jan 2007 02:57:00 PST