Kelly profile picture

Kelly

alligator pie, alligator pie, if i don't get some soon, i think i'm gonna die!

About Me

(to see more of my work... check out www.kellyhaigh.com) I live in Vancouver with my Terrydactyl, as I call him... we have a band together called Ashley Park. (www.ashleypark.net) I love painting, music, dogs, diet coke, Neko Case and orange marmalade... not neccessarily in that order. I am a hairdresser for half the week... and a painter for the other half... I am also a full time co-parent to three of the cutest dogs in the whole world! If I could have a few more, I'd be thrilled. It's my dream to have an island of my own... a Doctor Moreau kind of place, where I could make my own dog mixes... only I would never sell any, and I would love them all. I suppose I'd have to start importing people to help us pet them. I'd also love to have a tomatoe garden, and a graveyard there, like Olsamy cemetary in Prague, with gothic headstones, covered over in ivy. YES! (there would also be pizza delivery... for when we're too tired to cook.)Also... every single time I get on an airplane, I am convinced it will crash, but I am equally as sure that I will somehow survive... and since Lost, I now scan the other passengers and imagine who I'd like to hang out with should we end up on a deserted island. My last trip was to Prague, and the one girl who I decided would be my new best pal ended up being the very person to sit smack beside me. When she offered me some of her goldfish crackers with a friendly smile, I got a little concerned... I figured it was a sign... but, thankfully that wasn't the case. Sometimes a goldfish cracker is just a goldfish cracker.--

My Interests

art, music, dogs, photography, surfing, travel, tapdancing, museums... (One of my favorite places is the Natural History Museum in London. I could spend days in there.) The one in New York is also so neat. The displays are like glimpses into frozen moments in secret worlds, and seeing them that way is one of the only ways to get to be part of those worlds. I guess I love dead stuffed things, though it saddens me when they are killed, rather than salvaged... which is maybe why Sarina Brewer is one of my heros. She's pretty neat, alright. I also like buying antique rubber toys and repainting their faces.

I'd like to meet:

I'd like to meet the person who invented pie. I love cherry pie, and blueberry pie... i have loved every pie i've ever met... I would like to meet Bob Dylan... I'd also like to meet Mikhail Bulkogov, and Haruki Murakami. I'd really like to discuss a few things with them. I'd like to meet Ray Caesar, because he amazes me constantly. I'd like to meet Ricky Gervais, because I love him... and ever since seeing his standup act, all of my funniest thoughts pop into my head in his voice, with his accent... though, when I try to tell the jokes I think up, they're just not as funny coming out in my own voice! ha! it's the strangest thing...

Music:

Neko Case and Bob Dylan are my all time favorites... Old George Jones with Tammy Wynette, Freakwater, Loretta Lynn, EmmyLou Harris, Gram Parsons, Aimee Mann, The Innocence Mission, the Byrds, Flying Burrito Brothers, Gene Clark, Gene Watson, the Arlenes, Lilys, Camera Obscura, Johnny Cash, Concrete Blonde, Thad Cockrell and Caitlyn Carey, and Carolyn Mark are all on my IPOD, as well as my recent additions... Frank Makak (one of my top myspace friends) who reminded me to dig up the Clash.. and the Sadies new release... I'd be proud if I were hit by a car, and someone swiped my ipod off my broken bloody carcass... because they'd be in for a real treat!!!

Movies:

Dogville is my number one movie, because it changed the way I think of myself, and of other people, for that matter. I loved the Butcher Boy, and the Legend of 1900, Sympathy for Lady Vengence, and I am not ashamed to say that Dumb and Dumber still kicks my behind!!! Ferris Bueller's day off gave me permission to take cutting classes to a whole new level. Watching In the Mood for Love is like watching a painting come to life, and so is Sleepy Hollow... and I really liked Raise the Red Lantern. I was inspired by Titus... the forest scene where Levinia's hands and tongue are gone... beautiful and disturbing scene... beautifully disturbing! OH YES...Grey Gardens... that movie was huge for me! I went out and got tap shoes for my birthday present to myself after I saw that!!! Little Edie is my hero. Big Edie is none too shabby either. Grizzly Man really was something... I try not to go all Timothy Tredwell... That's our new saying for when you lash out all angry, then immediately apologize, and act all sweet and loving.

Television:

So happy everything has ended for summer... more time to paint, make music and play with dogs!!!

Books:

Perfume, the Master and Margarita, Not Wanted on the Voyage, the Windup Bird Chronicle, The Company-Portrait of a Murderer.

Heroes:

Terry Miles... aka 'my Terrydactyl', Neko Case, Bob Dylan, Little and Big Edie, Sarina Brewer, and Ray Caesar, who is one of the most brilliant artists of our time, and a kind man as well! My mom is also pretty cool. So is Gregory (the GOOSE)... Gotta love Gregory!!! ...and I would put Neko Case's name a million times, because I can't paint without hearing her. She is an endless well of inspiration for me. I love her. She's the Bee's Knees!!! My newest hero, for her super coolness and incredible fashion designs is Jennifer Nicholson... jenNicholson.com i only wanna paint girls wearing Jen dresses. they are amazzzzzing. I have one. hehe... also, my hero is whoever invented fruit pies. I love that person.

My Blog

Balls out hot summer day.

I have been promising my dad that I would help him hang pictures in his new home. His Parkinsons' makes his hands pretty shakey, so a hammer and nails are likely not a good idea for him...
Posted by Kelly on Thu, 03 Jul 2008 11:17:00 PST

Happy Creaster.

Walking my dogs today, I noticed a crow sitting atop a postal storage box... He was plucking some stringy stuff up out of something and eating it, so I thought I'd go in for a closer look. H...
Posted by Kelly on Sat, 28 Jun 2008 05:11:00 PST

Chirpy Chirpy Cheep Cheep Middle of the Road 1971

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ldfkBwFyXgs ...
Posted by Kelly on Sat, 03 May 2008 11:19:00 PST

...the crotch of life.

I never have had the good fortune to be a person who sleeps well, or sleeps through the night. I say this all the time. When I do sleep, my dreams are so intense, that I sometimes grip my ow...
Posted by Kelly on Tue, 29 Apr 2008 05:06:00 PST

St. Patrick, Schmatrick, and F@*k Starbucks.

Holy God. SO, I am trying to quit drinking diet pepsi (again) and, every day for the past week, I’ve been having an iced latte.. Until yesterday, I got myself a large, with an extra&n...
Posted by Kelly on Tue, 18 Mar 2008 04:23:00 PST

eating eels, and chopping up clients...

A few days ago at work, a client and I were discussing what we want to have happen to our bodies after we die. She's a very nice Italian lady, and she told me that she is so clausterphobic that she&nb...
Posted by Kelly on Wed, 27 Feb 2008 12:43:00 PST

Happy Valentines Day!

Valentine's Day is my favorite day of the whole entire year. Romance Schmo-mance.... I could care less about any of that. It's about getting to wear pink and red without people thinking you're an...
Posted by Kelly on Fri, 15 Feb 2008 06:47:00 PST

HOUSE, the vet edition.

I woke up from the strangest dream... There was this little village, where people lived on little hills with their pets. (When I say 'hills', they were more like little mounds of dirt, with grass grow...
Posted by Kelly on Mon, 04 Feb 2008 08:46:00 PST

Happy New Year do-over.

I don't really have anything wise or amusing to share. I barely made it through Christmas this year... The highlight was opening my beautifully wrapped dog's head that arrived just in t...
Posted by Kelly on Thu, 17 Jan 2008 07:14:00 PST

Krampus.... hes coming for you!

Hmmmmmmmm... Last night I arrived home quite late after a marathon day of cutting people's hair. I had a bag full of presents to show for my troubles... a nice new sweater, a cd, fine wine and chocola...
Posted by Kelly on Sat, 15 Dec 2007 09:26:00 PST