Kinetic Friends profile picture

Kinetic Friends

About Me

Much like the migrating seal hast cleaned the buttocks of her young, the rock n' roll airplane hast dropped onto us two rock pods into Kentucky and New Hampshire alike, both of which spawned into the most boundary smashing, ball crushing, arm ripping, and (you bet your ass bitch) baby eating bad boys of rock. Wad Ronson fell unto the people of Kentucky and from a tenderly young age he engaged in rocking their asses apart. He knew that there was nothing left of Kentucky by the time he was 27, so he hitchhiked up to Oshkosh, WI. It was gay there but he stayed. J.P. Stix, erected in a huge town in New Hampshire, was adopted by a strange Alaskan walrus poacher. Having grown up in the badlands of Alaska, he actually has no memory from 3pm to about 4:45pm for every Tuesday in between 1982 through 1986. "It's fucked up," he thunders. Stix and ROnson met at Harder's bar in Oshkosh at a Jumpin' Jerry's amateur comedy night, when ROnson made Stix cry. THe two quickly formed a band and made plans to takeover the state.Here is where they met their Third conspiritor, known only as Grizzly Atomizer. Stix and Ronson were walking down the street as their attention was drawn towards a street preacher dressed in Drag. He was preaching about The great Walrus Genocide soon to come as prediction in the scriptures, Stix commented on Grizzly's tooth necklace and this is where their bond formed. Grizzly was raised by a hippie death cult in a squat in Baltimore. The first of 26 children, born to The notorious Bigum Grettle and the morbidly obese Miss Meat Clever. Grizzly started street preaching at the age of four, and had a steady following by the age of seven. He stayed living in his squat with the hippie death cult Untill the age of 14 when they kicked Him out for Refusing to eat anything containing citrus. This is when he started his walkabout across the continent, which led to his drowning last October. Moonbeam's origins remain a mystery. Although he only says "I come from the moon," we pretty damn sure he's from New Hampshire because that's where his mom lives.
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My Interests

Music:

Member Since: 8/23/2005
Band Members:J.P. Stix on drums.Wad Ronson on guitar.Moonbeam on bass.
Influences: Melvins, Form of Rocket, Night Ranger, Thin Lizzy, Jesus Lizard, Big Black, Flaming Lips, Enon, SKins, Tomahawk, Uzeda, Smashy Smashy, Faith No More, Dead Kennedys, The Freedom Fighters, Laughing Hyenas, Polvo, Fugazi
Record Label: Los Dermos
Type of Label: None

My Blog

Videos!!!

Yes, we have videos posted.  Check em out.  They're from a show we did at the Warehouse in Madison.  We should have more up soon.  ThanksYER FRIENDSTHE KINETIC FRIENDS...
Posted by Kinetic Friends on Tue, 09 Jan 2007 04:37:00 PST

The Continuing Story of the Jackal

The Continuing Story of the Jackal; by J.P. Stix Chapter 39 of Volume III, pages 119-121 Anger was rising, fuming from the angry sky.  "Angry at whom?" thought young Peter.  He was a stup...
Posted by Kinetic Friends on Fri, 20 Jan 2006 02:44:00 PST

The Origins of Wet Spinach Ass

The Continuing Story of the Jackal, by J.P. Stix part IV; installment 36 "The Origins of the Wet Spinach Ass" The meadows reak of wet ass spinach; a humid, pale stench.  Much like when a man e...
Posted by Kinetic Friends on Mon, 14 Nov 2005 06:59:00 PST