Laura Levites profile picture

Laura Levites

I really don't give a shit!!!!

About Me

I am a comedian. If another person tells me that I am angry or cynical I'm going to fucking snap. I am honest. I wasn't born with that censoring gene most people have, if I feel it I say it. Do what you want with that.

My Interests

Cooking, I am a woman and I like to be in the kitchen, take that you feminist bitches Sex, I am interested in sex. My two dogs, I am even codependant with my animals. Its winter and my dogs are wearing freaking coats because they shiver, I might as well find a short bald jewish guy to marry, move to the suburbs, go on fertility medication and pop out a litter of two headed babies. I am interested in food, sex and animals.

I'd like to meet:

People who take it in the ass. They have a better sense of humor.

Music:

My taste in music is gay, literally gay. If it comes from a Fag I love it. Basically l like upbeat dance music that gives me an uncontrollable urge to shake my fat ass around my apartment in my underware.

Movies:

Xanadu, Grease anything with Olivia Newton John

Television:

Oprah

Books:

The Beaty Myth, Backlash, Sisterhood is Forever, Bitch, Cunt, Womens Inhumanity Towards Women, anything written by a vagina that tells me its wrong to like porn, be thin, and wear makeup.

Heroes:

Howard Stern and Martin Luther King

My Blog

Creepy Old Men

I worked at a comedy club this weekend, where I was approached by an older jewish fella that stared at me like I was lunch.  He was introduced to me as a friend of a friend so I had to be nice an...
Posted by Laura Levites on Mon, 10 Apr 2006 04:55:00 PST

1000 Words with Laura Levites by Monti Carlo

MY FIRST PIECE FOR CLOSER MAGAZINE (closermagazine.com) 1000 WORDS W/ LAURA LEVITES by Monti Carlo   Laura Levites is standing on Broadway in Manhattan when she takes my call. She is in front o...
Posted by Laura Levites on Fri, 17 Feb 2006 02:44:00 PST