"My passions were all gathered together like fingers that made a fist. Drive is considered aggression today; I knew it then as purpose." (Bette Davis)
I was a victim of marital rape, but now I am a survivor.
Why tell my tale?
In silence we are victims, in speaking out we empower ourselves. In speaking out we may help prevent another person from being raped.
Don't just take back the night, take back your life!
Rape is the subjugation of an individual by another(s)by force or threat of force (includes forcible rape, statutory rape, sexual assault).
THE RAPIST IS ALWAYS RESPONSIBLE FOR THE ASSAULT!!!
Motives of rapists include:
1) anger (vicious unplanned attack triggered by anger and resentment toward women; usually associated with degrading and humilating acts, forced oral sex and forced anal sex),
2)power (desire to control and dominate the victim), and
3) sadism (ritualised savage attack; usually associated with humilating, degrading, torturing, mutilating and murdering their victim).
Types of Rape include stranger rape, acquaintance rape, date rape, gang rape, male rape (estimated 1:10 rape survivors are male), marital rape, rape by women (usually aiding/abetting men attacking another woman).
If you are raped:
1)don't change anything about your body (shower, brush hair, change clothes) or you could destroy evidence;
2)strongly consider reporting the incident to police (you may prevent another woman from being assaulted, and you will empower yourself going from a victim to a survivor);
3)ask a relative/friend to take you to hospital if you can't get an ambulance/police;
4)seek help assertively (make sure a written/photographic record is made); and
5)question health professionals (biological risks, available treatments, counseling services, demand confidentiality).
The above information is from Rathus, S. A., Nevid, J. A., & Fichner-Rathus, L. (1998). Essentials of Human Sexuality, Boston: Allyn & Bacon.
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