Ryan Niemiller profile picture

Ryan Niemiller

Then I peed in the clown’s mouth, blowing up a balloon, and I won a stuffed Pink Panther.

About Me

I do standup comedy. I also dabble in some other things, like just standing up. Not necessarily doing comedy while I stand, but just being upright. Enjoy being vertical. Try it sometime. It'll change your world.
I'm also probably the most handicapped guy you know. And if I'm not, I don't want to be your friend, as you hang out with way too many cripples.
I'm also always accepting bookings, so if you'd like me to do a show, just let me know!

My Interests

Standup comedy, Improv, professional wrestling, baseball, football, basketball, old video games, your love and affection

I'd like to meet:

You rascals.Feel free to message me on AIM - Snabbit888

Music:


Movies:

What Dreams May Come, Rat Race, Jersey Girl, Thank You For Smoking, Snakes on a Plane, Punch Drunk Love, National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, Little Miss Sunshine

Television:

Arrested Development, The Simpsons, Futurama, Mythbusters, Sports Night, The West Wing, How I Met Your Mother, The Critic, Upright Citizens Brigade, Sportscenter, Comedy Central Presents

Books:

The Bible... ha ha. Just kidding! I'm a heathen.

Heroes:

Mmm... hero sandwich...

My Blog

Can Ryan Do This?

I am in the early stages of working on some scripts for a viral series I want to do, and I need your help! The idea is called, "Can Ryan Do This?"  Essentially, with my handicap, I get asked a lo...
Posted by Ryan Niemiller on Thu, 09 Oct 2008 03:59:00 PST

You don’t get it

I wish just one person would get it.  One person.  But no one does, and no one ever will. I'm giving up.  I'll tell my jokes and smile and dance for you.  And it won't make a bit o...
Posted by Ryan Niemiller on Mon, 01 Sep 2008 03:08:00 PST

Possibly moving soon

My roommate may be taking a job back in the Midwest and moving in a couple months, so I'm in the early stages of trying to find another place to live just in case.  Can anybody recommend somewher...
Posted by Ryan Niemiller on Sun, 31 Aug 2008 06:08:00 PST

Here’s some bloggy stuff!

I haven't posted a blog in awhile so here's a bit of an update on my existence. *** My car is finally back up and running.  I originally was going to sell it and maybe upgrade a bit, but I figure...
Posted by Ryan Niemiller on Thu, 28 Aug 2008 01:28:00 PST

Some stuff

Some big stuff that's been happening recently. - I did my first 45 minute set last week up in Bakersfield.  Obviously there are some things that I need to work on it, but for my first time doing ...
Posted by Ryan Niemiller on Thu, 24 Jul 2008 03:08:00 PST

This is getting old

It's days like these that make me wonder how much longer I should try.  You get to a point where it just keeps piling on and all you can say is, "Really?" Here's a brief summary of recent events:...
Posted by Ryan Niemiller on Tue, 08 Jul 2008 02:41:00 PST

Family reunion this weekend

I have to fly home tomorrow for a family reunion. I'm a little thrown off on how this weekend will go. For starters, I hate flying. Hate it. It's a hassle to get around the airport. I hate going throu...
Posted by Ryan Niemiller on Thu, 05 Jun 2008 12:36:00 PST

My birthday is in a week!

Next Sunday is my birthday.  It is officially my first worthless birthday, as I am turning 26.  There is absolutely nothing appealing about that age.  It just feels shitty.  You do...
Posted by Ryan Niemiller on Mon, 19 May 2008 01:03:00 PST

This Week In Blogball

Dating sucks out here for everybody.  I get that.  Up until recently, I was so completely unstable with everything that it was probably a blessing in disguise that I wasn't dating anybody.&n...
Posted by Ryan Niemiller on Fri, 16 May 2008 09:54:00 PST

IKEA is the scariest place on earth

Yesterday's trip to Burbank for some interior decorating with my roommate made me realize two very important things: 1) That sentence may be one of the gayest things I've ever written, and 2) I have a...
Posted by Ryan Niemiller on Sat, 10 May 2008 02:57:00 PST