Man, where do I begin? Well as of today I'm a christian pastor of a church called The Passion for Christ Movement that is located downtown Los Angeles. I know right now if you knew me in highschool or college, your jaw just hit the floor. Maybe your just in shock, or laughing like "no way, that cat can't be no pastor" kinda stuff. I can only say I feel you and it's my false conversion and hypocrisy as well as many other "christians" who profess to know Christ but deny Him by how they live, what they do, listen to and watch. So I don't blame you, I blame myself. I owe you more then a quick "my bad" or "I'm sorry". I am sorry for living a life that made people take Christ's salvation and whole life's purpose for a flippant joke. He paid the price of His life when God's law called for my death. I was guilty of breaking God's law and was supposed die, but instead Christ took my place, to save me from the power of sin and the penalty of sin, and here I go running back into my sin, the sin that put Christ there. So I don't blame you all for being shocked, It's all me. I loved sin more then God's forgiveness and grace, I thought I could be saved as a Christian and still practice sin, man was I deceived. Nevertheless, I feel I owe everybody an explaination.
But how do you explain to so many people who once new you as a loud, care free, crazy, got jokes for everybody, girl chasing, signifying negro, that
the person I was, is the person that often floods my eyes with tears and fills my heart with sorrow and disgrace. If you knew me in the past my (highschool years) your proably saying, "whoa, justin's really trippin, I liked the jokes, the fool, the girl chasing wanna be playa". I know this is hard for many people to swallow, mainly because I kept people laughing and entertained. From the pep rallies, to drama, to A.S.B, to Athletics, to homecoming king, I was the school fool that joked and tapped danced his way into so many peoples hearts. And if you knew me while I was attending the University of Wisconsin-Madison, you knew me for being a fool, wanna be playa, with the addition of embracing a passion to free Afro-Americans from the bigotry and racial injustices I experieneced in wisconsin as well as globally. I still had more jokes then Dave Chappell, but more so, I was ready to go to jail defending the civil liberties of Black people. But all this seemingly came to a screeching end one day, when one day I went from a girl chasing, clubing, Black freedom fighter/ Track Athlete to a man in desperate pursuit of my own freedom, not physically or socially, but spiritually, freedom from the shackles of sin,self and God's Justice.
I found out that I was terminally ill. I had a disease that was extremely common amongst people but extremely hard to detect, infact theres only one way to know if you have it, and still many people deny they have it even when they carry all of the physical outward symptoms. This disease has caused the destruction of men, women, kids, animals even the earth and the universe at one time. It's caused towns to be destroyed cities left deserted and people have died from it in an instant.The bad news everybody is born with this disease, yes even you. I know like me you proably in denial right now, like " I'm not sick, just cause you got it don't put that on everybody else". Alright I can feel you on that, I wont just assume you have it. But seeing how deadly this disease is and how deceptive it is and it can even trick the mind into making you justify the reality that you have it even after your test result prove you have it. I just so happen to have the test available here on my space, don't take my word that you have take the test and see for your self. Do you want to see if you have it? If so heres a quick test.Have you ever told a lie before? Have you ever stoled something in your life, even if it's small, and here's the one that got me, Jesus said whoever looks at a woman or a person to lust/ with sexual desire in his or her heart, as already committed the act in the heart and is guilty of adultery. So honestly, if you answered yes to any of those questions then you have you have just fulfilled Biblical scripture. The Bible say's every person has sinned and is guilty of being a law breaker, and if you have ever lied you have broken number 9 of the ten commandents, ever stolen, thats number 8, ever coveted something that was not yours, thats number 10, ever enjoyed something more than God thats idolatry and number 2, has pleasing God and God alone been your goal over anything else, if not you have broken the number 1 commandment. If you have done any of these things your guilty of breaking God's holy and righteous law. And if you don't believe in the bible or the 10 commandments don't worry The Bible says God wrote them on your heart. Every human being knows it's wrong to lie, and steal, hate and murder. This is the disease I had, it's called sin, the symptoms get even deeper then this, and if goes untreated and you die in sin, then on judgement day God will find you guilty of breaking His law and send you to His place of punishment, called HELL. Does that concern you?
(to be continued)
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