The Royal Dutch Of Dukes profile picture

The Royal Dutch Of Dukes

The same old same, We keep repeating history

About Me


CLICK HERE AND READ THE SUNSHINE EMPIRE AT MY NEW FREESTANDING BLOG
"Those who would give up essential Liberty, to purchase a little temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety."
Benjamin Franklin
"With this patriotism-patriotism in its large and wholesome meaning-America can master its power and turn it to the noble cause of peace. We can maintain military power without militarism; political power without oppression; and moral power without compulsion or complacency."
Adlai Stevenson
"But that the dread of something after death, The undiscover'd country from whose bourn No traveller returns"
William Shakespeare
"Fear is just another word for ignorance"
Dr. Hunter S. Thompson
I am the leader of the vast left-wing conspiracy. I am also a member of a secret society known only as "Roger." Change is the only constant my friends. I walk through life, read the paper, search the information superhighway, and actually pay attention to the world around me and feel the nation as a whole has lost its collective fucking mind. I am an American patriot who believes in the Freak Power of the late Dr. Thompson. I also loathe the powers that be, and the government of my great nation. This Profile was edited with the help of Formica Jones. He's the Master Blaster of all you asisstamatary countertop needs.
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My Interests

The interests of my life are extremely self-destructive, and bring me nothing but pain and misery. Politics, savage debauchery, exotic drinking, dark women,

absurd websites,

www.homestarrunner.com

and excessive amounts of caffeine

are the wonders that pass the time for me in Florida. I love wine, classical music, sock puppets, and long drives through historic areas of town. The grand tapestry that is the human existance is a wonderment to me. I love history and all its twists and turns.

I love my home state,

despite the bizarre population that roam the highways and byways,

and I dearly love my hometown,

my 2004 Stanley Cup Champion Tampa Bay Lightning,

and my Jacksonville Jaguars.

College Football, political punditry, comedy, and Wagner are what I use to make the wine taste good.

I'd like to meet:

The most facinating people by and large are already dead. Having said that I most often imagine a dinner party filled with those whom have influenced my life. The niceties of said dinner party would degenerate into a drinking contest between myself,

Shirley Manson,

Theodore Roosevelt,

David Letterman,

Dr. Hunter S. Thompson,

Dave Attell,

and Lewis Black.

Here's two of them for posterity

Once the alcohol is flowing the high point of the evening would be when Dr. Thompson and TR decide to stage a boxing match in my living room. Among the living today I would have to say that I admire John Stewart, Joe Conason, and my Mother and Father (it may sound contrived but they are among the few sane people I know in a world filled with insanity.)

Music:

I try to stay away from the standard sludge that clogs the rivers of good taste in this country. Yet I am not quite the music snob that my friends are. Never mind they actually know how to play music on real instuments. The concert lineup to end all would compose of the masters of my musical taste. Garbage,

Ben Folds Five,

Air, Mellow, Stereolab, The Bravery, Zeromancer, The Red Hot Chili Peppers (before they sold out and started trying to imitate Creed), Sisters of Mercy, Big Boi, Dr. Dre, Lush, Wagner, The Avalanches,
Snoop Dogg, Veruca Salt, Morningwood, Luscious Jackson, Jet By Day, The Apples In Stereo,

The Beastie Boys,

Chopin, The Ohio Players, Less Than Jake, Dean Martin, Ladytron,

Melissa Auf Der Maur,

Frank Sinatra,

Movies:

Any discussion of movies has to start with the greatest example of perfection in American cinema. This towering example of great moviemaking is

The Big Lebowski.

Any Cohen brothers movie is going to be worth your time really. Any movie with Bill Murray is also a favorite of mine. Some other favorites are Lost In Translation, Zardoz, Donnie Darko,

Goldfinger,

Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, V For Vendetta, Punch Drunk Love, Primer, Novicane, Office Space, Snatch, War Bus Commando, GlennGary GlennRoss, Ghostbusters, The Royal Tenenbaums, Star Trek II,

and the original Oceans 11.

Television:

Mr. Show,

Sifl and Ollie Show,

The Daily Show,

Futurama,

Family Guy, Cowboy Beebop, The History Channel, The Kids in the Hall, Comedy Central Presents, The Real Estate Channel, Big Brother, Frontline, Late Show with David Letterman, The Hollow Men.

Books:

The Rise of Theodore Roosevelt, Theodore Rex, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, Kingdom of Fear, Eat the Rich, The Davinci Code, Macbeth,
Dune,

Brave New World, Blinded by the Right, What Liberal Media?,
Lies and the lying liars who tell them,

Breach of Faith: The Fall Of Richard Nixon, America the Book, Parliment Of Whores, How the Irish Saved Civilization.

Heroes:

Theodore Roosevelt

Dr. Hunter S. Thompson,

Captain James T. Kirk,

Jon Stewart,

The inventor of wine.

My Blog

Country Burritos and The Sunshine Empire

In what spare time I have my two main passions are stand up comedy, and politics.  That's why I began writing my own free standing blog called The Sunshine Empire.  The political commentary ...
Posted by The Royal Dutch Of Dukes on Mon, 03 Dec 2007 07:22:00 PST

On Police Powers For Target Employees

As we go through our respective lives, we all come across those little indications of people lacking basic intelligence have preceded you. My favorite is what I see every time I go to Target. When you...
Posted by The Royal Dutch Of Dukes on Fri, 20 Jul 2007 09:40:00 PST

Politics: The wretched underbelly of a noble cause.

This is a reprint of a piece that I wrote for The Sunshine Empire.  Visit The Sunshine Empire for more  written content from the Dutch of all Dukes.  Click here to go there now. &n...
Posted by The Royal Dutch Of Dukes on Mon, 18 Jun 2007 09:07:00 PST

A UFC Fight To The Finish For The Presidency

I listen to a great deal of Howard Stern and Bubba The Love Sponge while driving during the day, and they constantly talk about UFC, Ultimate Fighting Championship. Now very quietly to the average spo...
Posted by The Royal Dutch Of Dukes on Fri, 08 Jun 2007 10:00:00 PST

You Tube Seeks our destruction

This is a reprint of a piece that I wrote for The Sunshine Empire.  Visit The Sunshine Empire for more  written content from the Dutch of all Dukes.  Click here to go there now.  W...
Posted by The Royal Dutch Of Dukes on Sat, 12 May 2007 10:20:00 PST

Rampant, Militant, Individualism.

The Sunshine Empire. This is a repost from The Sunshine Empire.  Please read more there.    The horrible tragedy in Blacksburg has brought out the usual media roving plague of Satell...
Posted by The Royal Dutch Of Dukes on Thu, 19 Apr 2007 09:50:00 PST

For Sale Sign on the House Of God

I'm generally heartless when it comes to massive commercial garbage like the movie Titanic's attempts to pull at my heartstrings. Yet there is sadness that you can observe in regular life that lives j...
Posted by The Royal Dutch Of Dukes on Sun, 08 Apr 2007 12:13:00 PST

Odd thoughts on body wash and man perfume

Is there a body wash or soap primarily for men that does not center their product's commercial around having random half naked women rape you? It really does make you wonder that there was a time you ...
Posted by The Royal Dutch Of Dukes on Fri, 06 Apr 2007 06:47:00 PST

Band Together With Me To Ban The Exclamation Point. Join the Revolution.

This blog entry was reprinted from The Sunshine Empire.  The Sunshine Empire is a collection of essays, humorous and musical clips, and calls to action such as this.  Visit The Sunshine Empi...
Posted by The Royal Dutch Of Dukes on Wed, 21 Mar 2007 08:34:00 PST

The Goth Girl With The Monkey

When DJ Black decides to leave your town for bigger and greater things, you make sure that you are there to see him off.  Whoever DJ Black is.  I don't really know.  In all reality when...
Posted by The Royal Dutch Of Dukes on Sun, 25 Feb 2007 07:52:00 PST