Dan profile picture

Dan

But seriously folks....where the hell are the socks disappearing to?

About Me

I just wanna make 'em laugh.

My Interests

Martial arts; sports; films; literature; your mom; and of course, ghostbusting.

I'd like to meet:

The spirit of Artex, the horse who died in the Neverending Story, so I could ask him "Dude, what the hell were you so sad about in the swamps? You're a horse for christ's sake! And it's not like Atreyu had you strapped to some carriage downtown, forcing you to shit in a bag while pulling tourists on the same lousy tour day after day. He treated you really good, but at the point when he needed you most you got all depressed and you sank into the swamps forever. Not cool Artex, not cool. Do you have any idea how traumatizing that was for me watching as a kid? I was so sad I started sinking into my couch! But here's the thing, did you know that after you died, Atreyu didn't sink? No I'm serious man. After losing his supposed best friend and companion, the sadness didn't get to him. Between you and me, I don't think he liked you very much. I think he had a secret crush on the Luck Dragon, and he took you through the swamps to get rid of you. Hey don't get mad at me, I'm just the messenger.

Music:

Radiohead; Arcade Fire; The Dears; U2; The Tragically Hip; Coldplay; Pearl Jam; CCR; The Counting Crows;The Doors; Nirvana; Red Hot Chili Peppers; Our Lady Peace; Matthew Good; Beastie Boys; Gorillaz; The Roots; The Strokes; and on and on and on.....

Movies:

All the nerd trilogies; Old School and all things Will Ferrell; Swingers and all things Vince Vaughn; Napoleon Dynamite; The Royal Tannenbaums; Borat; Braveheart; Snatch & Lock Stock; Fight Club; Dead Poets Society; The Shawshank Redemption;The Godfather Part Iⅈ Goodfellas; Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind; Annie Hall; Almost Famous; Pulp Fiction; The Usual Suspects; The Others; Jerry McGuire; The Muppets Take Manhatten; The Dark Crystal; Across the Universe; X-Men Iⅈ and on...and on....and on....

Television:

The Simpsons; Seinfeld; Curb Your Enthusiasm; Arrested Development; Family Guy; Six Feet Under; The Office British version closely followed by the American version; Extras; Oz; Dexter; Futurama; Hell's Kitchen/Kitchen Nightmares; Boston Legal

Books:

J.R.R Tolkein's The Lord of the Rings; Homer's Iliad and Odyssey; Virgil's Aeneid; Maxwell Maltz's Psychocybernetics; Wally Lamb's I Know This Much is True; Neil Postman's Amusing Ourselves to Death; David Suzuki's The Sacred Balance; Jared Diamond's Guns, Germs, and Steel; Bram Stoker's Dracula; Anne Rice's Vampire Chronicles; Dan Brown's Angels and Demons; The New Lexicon Webster's Encyclopedic Dictionary; Anything by Dave Barry; Stan Lee's version of the Bible

Heroes:

Frodo Baggins. Carried the fate of Middle Earth into the fiery depths of Mordor on those tiny shoulders.