TC Candler

A 35 year-old film critic and professional poker player, I was born in England, but have lived in various parts of the United States since 1987.
I graduated from Oklahoma State University in 1997 with a degree in English, with a strong emphasis in Film, Poetry & Fiction Writing.
I currently live in a suitcase, traveling the world as a full time Poker-Pro. I am also a film critic & web designer of IndependentCritics.com and TCCandler.com.
As a film critic, the most important qualities a film can possess are: Originality, Focus, Passion, Heart, Intelligence & Wit... all framed by magnificent acting, sure- handed directing, gorgeous cinematography & a beautiful score or soundtrack. I am a big fan of French and Italian films, and I much prefer the independent film scene to the mind-numbing repetition of most Hollywood blockbusters. I prefer to believe that films should be more than just mere entertainment. Nothing but pure entertainment tends to bore the hell out of me... which seems to be paradoxical. To merit a recommendation, I have to care.. I have to be moved... I have to know why a film exists!
My poker career began in 1998. Bearing one of the more bizarre nicknames in the game, "THE LLAMA", I have earned almost $250,000 in major tournaments around the world and on the internet, including the World Series of Poker and the L.A. Poker Classic. My main source of income is in cash games. Having dominated Canterbury Park's 15-30 and 30-60 games in 2000 and 2001, I moved to Los Angeles, where I proceeded to blow my entire bankroll. I broke the cardinal rule of bankroll management -- Never play above your limit!!! Luckily, I've recovered well and recently competed at the 2007 World Series of Poker and some World Poker Tour events. "THE LLAMA" is on the rise.
I am also a huge sports fanatic. I love playing and watching virtually every sport you care to name.
In addition, I run the following movie review website...
Bookmark it Now!
CIAO TC
SOME OF MY FAVORITE THINGS
The Moments after watching a Great Movie
Crying at Classic Sports Moments
High Resolution Photos of Beautiful Women
The Look and Sound of 1987 Ferrari Testarossas
1955 Thunderbirds Cruising Down the Highway
Being Surrounded by a Sea of Everton Blue
Remembering her Auburn Red Hair
Drinking a Great Wine for the First Time
Walking around Paris, France
Italian Women Talking
The Fjords in Norway
The Miami Dolphins Driving in the Fourth Quarter
New York Yankees Winning in the Ninth
Everton Scoring Late
Oklahoma State University Beating OU
Dan Marino Creating Art with a Football
Kirsty Gallacher Talking About Anything
Bill Clinton Dominating a Debate
Supermodels Prancing Down Catwalks
Wolves Prowling in the Snow
Dolphins Leaping From the Ocean
Cheetahs Running
The Eiffel Tower at Night
The Statue of Liberty in the Rain
Pocket Tens and Hitting the Flop
Saturday Afternoons
October Nights
Very Cold Snowy Weather
Old Black and White Photos
The First Sip of an Ice Cold Coca Cola
Opening Up a Can of Fresca
The Opening Credits and Song of "Survivor"
Having "24" Get Me Out of My Seat with Excitement
Seinfeld Reruns
The Morning Episode of SportsCenter
Kissing Someone Who Knows How to Kiss
Using Q-Tips
That Shower Fresh Feeling
A Good Cry for No Particular Reson
The First Hour of a Road-Trip
Finding a New Favorite Song
ACTOR'S STUDIO QUESTIONS
• What is your favorite word? - Hope.
• What is your least favorite word? - Bored.
• What is the sound or noise that you love? - Submarine Pings.
• What is the sound or noise that you hate? - My stomach rumbling.
• What turns you on? - Excellence or Greatness.
• What turns you off? - Lying.
• What profession would you most like to participate in? - Professional Athlete.
• What profession would you least like to participate in? - Accounting or Sales.
• What is your favorite curse word? - I love them all like children.
• What would you like to hear God say as you arrive at the pearly gates? - Here she is... And I was always listening.
SOME OF MY FAVORITE QUOTES
"If ignorance is bliss, why aren't more people happy?" - Thomas Jefferson
"No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted." - Aesop
"The man who views the world at 50 the same as he did at 20 has wasted 30 years of his life." - Muhammad Ali
"By words the mind is winged." - Aristophanes
"Never let your sense of morals prevent you from doing the right thing." - Isaac Asimov
"Film as dream, film as music. No art passes our conscience in the way film does, and goes directly to our feelings, deep down into the dark rooms of our souls." - Ingmar Bergman
"Education: That which discloses to the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understanding." - Ambrose Bierce
"My life has a superb cast but I can't figure out the plot." - Ashleigh Brilliant
"I either want less corruption, or more chance to participate in it." - Ashleigh Brilliant
"Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city." - George Burns
"As long as people will accept crap, it will be financially profitable to dispense it." - Dick Cavett
"To have another language is to possess a second soul." - Charlemagne
"I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy." - Tom Clancy
"If I can stop one heart from breaking, I shall not live in vain." - Emily Dickinson
"Real religion should be something that liberates men. But churches don't want free men who can think for themselves and find their own divinity within. When a religion becomes organized it is no longer a religious experience but only superstition and estrangement." - Federico Fellini
"How lovely to think that no one need wait a moment, we can start now, start slowly changing the world! How lovely that everyone, great and small, can make their contribution toward introducing justice straightaway... And you can always, always give something, even if it is only kindness!" - Anne Frank
"Happiness is as a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but which if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you." - Nathaniel Hawthorne
"Don't tell your problems to people: eighty percent don't care; and the other twenty percent are glad you have them." - Lou Holtz
"A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it."- Bob Hope
"A child needs your presence more than your presents." - Jesse Jackson
"Life isn't a matter of milestones, but of moments." - Rose F. Kennedy
"My religion is very simple, my religion is kindness." - Dalai Lama
"The most popular toy of 1996: 'Tickle Me Elmo'. And the least popular toy of 1996, you guessed it: 'Tickle Me Frank Stallone'." - Norm MacDonald
"When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized I was talking to myself." - Peter O'Toole
"Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things that escape those who dream only at night." - Edgar Allan Poe
"A hero is an ordinary individual who finds the strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles." - Christopher Reeve
"If you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you’ve always gotten." - Anthony Robbins
"Don't speak unless you can improve on the silence." - Spanish proverb
"It is better to be quotable than to be honest." - Tom Stoppard
"I'd call you an asshole, but an asshole is worth fucking once in awhile." - Kathy Thurber
"The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat." - Lily Tomlin
"A person is a person because he recognizes others as persons." - Desmond Tutu
"Love conquers all things except poverty and toothache." - Mae West
"OK. My family they got shot down by D.E.A. officers because of a drug problem. I left with the greatest guy on earth. He was a hitman, the best in town, but he died this morning. And if you don't help me, I'll be dead by tonight." - Natalie Portman as Mathilda in "Leon (The Professional)"
"A long, long time ago... there was a magic rose that made whoever plucked it immortal. But no one would dare go near it because its thorns were full of mortal poison. So, amongst the men, tales of pain and death were told in hushed voices. But there was no talk of eternal life... because men fear pain more than they want immortality. So, every day, the rose wilted, unable to bequeath its gift to anyone. Alone and forgotten at the top of that mountain. Forgotten until the end of time."- Ivana Baquero as Ofelia in "Pan's Labyrinth"
"I apologize to you if I don't seem real eager to jump into a forced awkward intimate situation that people like to call dating. I don't like the feeling. You're sitting there, you're wondering do I have food on my face, am I eating, am I talking too much, are they talking enough, am I interested I'm not really interested, should I play like I'm interested but I'm not that interested but I think she might be interested but do I want to be interested but now she's not interested? So all of the sudden I'm getting, I'm starting to get interested... And when am I supposed to kiss her? Do I have to wait for the door cause then it's awkward, it's like well goodnight. Do you do like that ass-out hug? Where you like, you hug each other like this and your ass sticks out cause you're trying not to get too close or do you just go right in and kiss them on the lips or don't kiss them at all? It's very difficult trying to read the situation. And all the while you're just really wondering are we gonna get hopped up enough to make some bad decisions? Perhaps play a little game called "just the tip". Just for a second, just to see how it feels. Or, ouch, ouch you're on my hair." - Vince Vaughn in "Wedding Crashers"
"Star Wars movies are for little boys, bi-curious frat guys who haven't grown up, and 40-year-old virgins who are nostalgic for a time when they still had a little hope." - TC Candler
Dude, no. This is serious. I just sharted. I tried to fart and a little shit came out. I just sharted. Now let's go." - Philip Seymour Hoffman in "Along Came Polly"
"Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect." - Mark Twain
"Did you hear the one about the Zen master who ordered a hot dog? He said he wanted 'one with everything'." - Nicolas Cage in "Next"
"Time is a film snob's best friend." - TC Candler
"You can't help yourself because your self sucks!" - Billy Bob Thornton in "School for Scoundrels"
"It's sad to fall asleep. It separates people. Even when you're sleeping together, you're all alone." - Jean Seberg in "Breathless" (1960)
"What's another word for Thesaurus?" - Steven Wright
"Sometimes I feel like I'm seeing it all at once, and it's too much, my heart fills up like a balloon that's about to burst... And then I remember to relax, and stop trying to hold on to it, and then it flows through me like rain and I can't feel anything but gratitude for every single moment of my stupid little life... You have no idea what I'm talking about, I'm sure. But don't worry... you will someday. " - Kevin Spacey in "American Beauty"
"If James Bond movies are beautiful high-priced call girls, then Vin Diesel's "XXX" is a dirty crack whore with syphilis." - TC Candler
"A writer is a person for whom writing is more difficult than it is for other people." - Thomas Mann
"Common sense is not too common." - Voltaire
"Every passing minute is another chance to turn it all around." - Cameron Crowe's "Vanilla Sky"
"A film is never really any good unless the camera is an eye in the head of a poet." - Orson Welles
"It is often better to wonder what a character is thinking than to know." - Roger Ebert
"I love you, you pay my Rent." - Neil Tennant
"We are put on this planet only once, and to limit ourselves to the familiar is a crime against our minds." - Roger Ebert
"The simple folk among us often accuse the deepest thinkers and most brilliant minds of pretentiousness. It is their best way to derail an argument that they know they are losing." - Anonymous
"To be or not to be. That's not really a question." - Jean-Luc Godard
"I suppose some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers." - T.S. Eliot
"Get busy living or get busy dying. That's what my friend Andy said. I hope Andy is down there. I hope I can make it across the border. I hope to see my friend and shake his hand. I hope the Pacific is as blue as it has been in my dreams... I hope!" - The Shawshank Redemption
"Youth ages, immaturity is outgrown, ignorance can be educated, drunkenness sobered, but stupid lasts forever." - Aristophanes
"Mr. Madison. What you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I've ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response was there anything that could even remotely be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul. ----- OK. A simple 'no' would've done just fine." - "Billy Madison"
"You’re like a big bear, with claws and fangs... fangs man. Big fuckin teeth, yeah man with fuckin teeth on ya. She’s just like this little bunny who’s just kinda cowering in the corner... shivering. Yeah man just kinda... And you got these claws, and you’re staring at these claws, and your thinking to yourself, with these claws, you’re thinkin'... now how am I supposed to kill this bunny, how am I supposed to kill this bunny, and your poking at it. Yeah you’re not hurting it, you’re just kinda gently batting the bunny around, you know what I mean? And the bunny's scared mike, the bunny's scared of you. And you got these fucking claws man and these fangs man, and you’re looking at your claws and your looking at your fangs and you’re thinking to yourself... I don’t know what to do man, I don’t know how to kill the bunny... with this you don’t know how to kill the bunny. Do you know what I mean? You’re like a big bear man." - VINCE VAUGHN as Trent in "Swingers" (1996)
"And that's how it came to pass that on the second-to-last day of the job, the convict crew that tarred the plate factory roof in the spring of forty-nine wound up sitting in a row at ten o'clock in the morning drinking icy cold, Bohemia-style beer, courtesy of the hardest screw that ever walked a turn at Shawshank State Prison." - MORGAN FREEMAN as Red in "The Shawshank Redemption" (1994)
"I'll never let go." - Kate Winslet as Rose in "Titanic"
"I am quietly judging you." - TOM CRUISE as Frank T.J. Mackey in "Magnolia" (1999)
"I'm still here you bastards!" - Steve McQueen in "Papillon"
"Every man dies. Not every man really lives." - Mel Gibson in "Braveheart"
"Laws and institutions must go hand in hand with the progress of the human mind, as that becomes more developed, as more discoveries are made, new truths disclosed, and manners and opinions change with the changing circumstances, institutions must advance also, and keep pace with the times. We might as well require a man to wear still the coat which fitted him as a boy as civilized society to remain ever under the regiment of their barbarous ancestors." - Thomas Jefferson
"Time destroys everything!" - Monica Bellucci in "Irreversible"
"Fool me once, shame on... uh... me. Ya fool me, I can't get fooled again." - George Dubya Bush in "F911"
"Hey, are those lizard? -- No, they're Italian." - Mark Wahlberg in "Boogie Nights"
"I have a love in my life. It makes me stronger than anything you can imagine." - Adam Sandler in "Punch-Drunk Love"
"The book says, we might be through with the past, but the past ain't through with us." - Philip Baker Hall in "Magnolia"
"What's the soup du jour? -- That's the soup of the day. -- Mmm... that's sounds good. I'll have that!" - Jim Carrey in "Dumb and Dumber"
"That's Money Baby!" - Vince Vaughn in "Swingers"
"Good father? Fuck you! Go home and play with your kids!" - Alec Baldwin in "Glengarry Glen Ross"
"Coffee is for closers!" - Alec Baldwin in "Glengarry Glen Ross"
"Maybe there I can tell her all those things they don't have words for here." - Billy Bob Thornton in "The Man Who Wasn't There"
"Supermodels are beautiful girls, Will. A beautiful girl can make you dizzy, like you've been drinking Jack & Coke all morning. She can make you feel high, full of the single greatest commodity known to man... promise. Promise of a better day. Promise of a greater hope. Promise of a new tomorrow. This particular aura can be found in the gait of a beautiful girl... In her smile, in her soul, in the way she makes every rotten little thing about life seem like it's going to be okay. The supermodels, Willy? That's all they are... Bottled promise. Scenes from a brand new day. Hope dancing in stiletto heels. A beautiful girl is all-powerful and that's as good as love... That's as good as love!" - Michael Rappaport in "Beautiful Girls"
"Meet me in Montauk!" - Kate Winslet in "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind"
"I guess the saying's true. In the poker game of life, women are the rake man. They are the fuckin' rake." - Ed Norton in "Rounders"
"And the sea will bring each man new hope... his sleep brings dream of home." - Capt. Marco Ramius to Jack Ryan in "The Hunt for Red October"
"How do you think the hike is going so far?" - Casey Affleck in "Gerry"