Deep in the heart of the Bermuda Triangle, the vile Commodore Meatpie terrorized the high seas aboard his mighty ship, The Red Devil. Throughout the Caribbean he horrified and pillaged on his never-ending quest to capture and enslave hotties. After looting and burning all of Devil's Island he set sail with his pirate crew to their hidden pirate cove. The hotties were held captive in the belly of the great ship for 40 days and 40 nights. They endured tortures of unfathomable magnitude at the hands of Commodore Meatpie and his evil band of brigands. After enduring all the suffering she could the leader of the captives, G-Town Butcher, rose up against the pirates and brought forth an uprising aboard the Red Devil. The pirates and hotties battled for 3 days and 3 nights, fighting for their lives and control of the mighty vessel. When the smoke cleared on the 4th morning, all but one of the pirate crew was left standing on the deck. It was Commodore Meatpie himself. Begging for them to spare his life, the hotties lashed the fallen Commodore to the mast of his former ship, and set sail for the open ocean having wrested control from their captors and emerging victorious.From that day forth, they would be known as The High Seas Hotties. In defiance of their former captors, they took on pirate names of their own. Lead by their Captain The G-Town Butcher , & Co-Captain Lickity Splittail. Here's the rest of this scurvy crew: Cheatin Chong , The Wicked Bitch of the West, Barooski , §era Femme , O'Raney , Hot For Teacher , Juicy J, WallBanger , Cherry Pop Tart , Lil TNT, Rink Panther , Bits & Pieces , Ultra Violence , Gear Jammer , Rhonda , Amy & Kelly. Over the next 10 years these names would become feared by pirates throughout the Caribbean as the High Seas Hotties hunted down and rid the ocean of more pirate scum. Their hold bursting with swag, the High Seas Hotties set course for their home, Devil's Island. The mighty women of the High Seas Hotties returned to their beloved island undefeated. During the celebration of their glorious victory the Hottie's captain, G-Town Butcher, had a few too many flagons of rum, and a brawl ensued the likes of which had never been seen before on Devil's Island. The girls strapped skates to their feet and with the fury of the mighty Winds at their back, set about in a circle trying to take each other out in a blaze of fire. When they awoke the next morning, bruised and hungover, all that was left of the mighty Red Devil was her anchor, mast, and a lightly toasted Commodore Meatpie.Their sailing days behind them, it's still a pirate's life for these High Seas Hotties. So watch your back, because they're going skate, kill, pillage and burn. They're going to SKATE KILL PILLAGE AND BURN! AND EAT BABIES!!!
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AAARRRR! Me hearties! So ya wanna get your scurvy ridden mitts on some HIGH SEAS HOTTIES shwag? Let us brand the High Seas Hotties flag upon ye's chest!
