my beautiful-blue-eyed-revolutionary-boy! ie: gregbunni, seeing how close i can get to another person...what are the perameters of love? my technicolor bike named louie(think-french)! giving louie to greg, making greg happy, my broken bike named jupiter fiasco, my beautiful yellow bike named ava, puting things together, physics, mechanics, philosophy, personifying everything, hepothetic peaganism, actual peaganism, i'm not a Fuzzy Bunny of Death anymore because they don't exist anymore, but i always will be, really, if you ask me, writing fiction, writing truth, writing truth inside of fiction, writing fiction inside of truth, thinking about making things, making things, figuring out whether what i just made is good, changing it if it isn't, getting away from myself, getting too far into myself, figuring out what happiness is and how i can find it and give it to others while having it myself as well, curiosity, keeping my ego in a little box because it matastosizes otherwise, comparing things, analizing people, figuring out what is valuable in life, trying to understand how the world works in a not-pragmatic way, figuring out what "honest" is and how i can be it, learning about people, learning why people think the way they do, feeling books, feeling words and pictures, feeling people's experiences, trying to create something meaningful, debating with myself and others on whether something that had been "done before" is thereby invalid simply because it has been "done before,"(i don't think that's true!), arguing philosophy, expading what i know, doing things i don't think i can do, people, people i don't know, people i don't understand and trying to understand them, other people's writing, other people's art, capturing the world through silver halite, flirting with androgeny, breaking fourth walls, going to the Neo-Futurist plays(T.M.L.M.T.B.G.B!!!) attempting to write poetry, painting bread, painting clothes, painting bread! spray-painting, helping friends make art, bothering people about things they don't like to be bothered about, sorry :) self-alteration, razor blades, DIY piercings, trying as hard as possible to make my hair look tye-dyed and still get a job, breathing, paying attention to my breaths and heartbeat, 3am sex, hoping deep down that people hear me having 3am sex, studio apartments, metaphysics, hearing stories about metaphysics, being scared, learning how not to be scared, pretencing i'm not human, singing badly, acting, the thought process that goes behind acting, thinking, living...
people who know something i don't know and are willing teahcers. people from far away. people who have fallen into nihilism and found a ladder out. people who know how to find that ladder so we can compare notes. people who enjoy analyzing and discussing literature. people who have different views than mine. people who have as much of an obsession with bunnies and guinea pigs as i do.
music that is more than music, lyrics that matter, music that goes into me, not through me, music that takes me to another place, lyrics that make me feel like i'm reading russian literature(sometimes): Nine Inch Nails, Bauhaus, The Cure, KoRn, Marilyn Manson, MSI! The Dresden Dolls, Tub Ring, Orgy, APC, Tool, The Fight Club Sound Track, Sonic Youth, Radiohed, Stone Temple Pilots, Nirvana, Alice In Chains, The Offspring, Liabach, KMFDM, Sisters of Mercy, Voltaire, Bjork, Korn, Apocalyptica, Rammstein, Dimmu Borgier & Cradle of Filth(but only in the winter time), Gorillaz(when i encounter certain moods), Nitzer Eb, Merzbow (i think i did.t spell that right), Wolfeyes, and sometimes even Pearl Jam(but 10 was their only good one!), underground hip-hop that i keep hearing at other people's houses and forget to get the names of. i hate emo music because it bastardizes emotion. i hate hard-core misic because it bastardizes anger. i love the ssentiment and mentality behind punk music. i love listening to music by people i know even if it sucks :)FONT
Fight Club, 12 Monkeys, Donnie Darko, Magnolia, Edward Scissorhands, The Crow, Natural Born Killers, Bully, Kids, Gummo, Nowhere, Being John Malkovich, Adaptation, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Run Lola Run, I 3 Huckabes, The Man Who Wasn't There, Hedwig and the Angry Inch, Irreversable, American Beauty, Dark City, The Five Obstructions, City of Lost Children, Pi, The Fifth Element, Tank Girl, La Chien Andolou, American Psycho, Waking Life, a lot of Film Noir, almost all movies directed by Alfred Hitchcock: Vertigo, North by Northwest, Rear Window, Rope, etc., The Fugitive Kind, You can't Take it With You, Arsenic and Old Lace, The Tenant, Rosemary's Baby, Bowling for Columbine, Fahrenheit 9/11, Naked Lunch, Requiem for a Dream, Interview with a Vampire, Nighmare Before Christmas, The Neverending Story, Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory (i just love the concept!), Blade Runner, Fahrenheit 451. Recently i've seen; The Illusionist, courtesy of gregbunni, and it was amazing; blending metaphysics, intellectual thought process and reeeeally beautful cinematography...also, Black Dahlia, again, it was wonderful, and made me wish that the world were perpetually the set of a film noir...i spirited away while very intoxicated, and loved it as well...i've been watching bits and pieces of The Cell, because gregbunni and i moved two weeks ago, and we have to reception of our idiotbox, but we do have a dvd player, however, the only dvd we have is The Cell, so i have come to know the mind of that serial killer quite well, indeed ;) BUT!! the be-all-to-end-all best movie i think i might have seen, EVER, let alone recently and it is....METROPOLIS!!! i fell in love with german empressionism. don't blame me it's an addiction. Metropolis is the most beautiful, unbelievable film i have ever-ever seen, and intend on some day finding a way to insert myself into the mind of Fritz Lang...
i hate tv... shoot! shoot!! smash the tv!!! (i did that once...) ~opinions aside~ ***though, i must admit...i watch HBO and Discovery Health. sometimes sundance. and every-so-often BBC. i have a strange fixation with watching maudlin melodrama-riddled shows about teenagers from the 80's and 90's.
Plato's Republic, The Communist Manifesto, Where Do We Go From Here, The Plague, The Western Lands, Of Love and Shadows, Choke, Fight Club, Lullaby, Invisible Monsters, Diary, Survivor, Crime and Punishment, The Brothers Karamazov(though i haven't finished it, it's 800 pages!) The Stranger, Metamorphosis, The Great Gatsby, Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep, Catcher in the Rye, 1984, Brave New World, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galexy, Macbeth, Hamlet, Long Hard Road Out of Hell, The Visit, anything by Edgar Allen Poe (hmm...couldn't see that one coming), Pieces of philosophy and stories by existentialist writers for example Kafka, Dostoyevsky and Camus, Watership Down...i'm beginning 100 Years of Solitude...there are so many books i want to read! if anyone has any suggestion for me?FONT
Harry Tuttle. anyone who is honest with themselves, certain people that i know, those who put up with me(bleen!more)...Dali...Kafka...Peter Murphy...Camus...Dostoyevsky(and his Roskolnikov)...Marilyn Manson...Tyler Durden(i.am.tyler.durden)/Chuck Palahnuik...Alfred Hitchcock...William S. Burrows...Philip K. Dick...Trent Reznor...um...my bunni...