godgirl profile picture

godgirl

the Girl who wanted to be God

About Me


NOTE: I do not accept friend requests from strangers, only people I know personally or through close friends. Do not ask, and you will not be offended when I refuse. Thanks!



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More about who i was in general then.....

I'm some kind of mongrel alien from another planet who came here to consume vast quantities of fish, fruit and vegetables, and to scare bands by following them around and turning up when they least expected me to.

Somewhere along the line I found the internet, I found some truly special people to share my life with and I lost a lot of the innocence that brought me here in the first place.

I used to have the beginnings of a career going, but I couldn't cope with the intense pressures at work and the desperately harsh and critical environment I was in, so I ended up leaving amid sickness and despair and so, because of this, I am now "self employed".


I don't do much these days, as a rule, apart from wibble around on the interweb, sleep a lot, read dodgy biographies and books about history, humanity, fish and fashion, go to gigs by the same bands in as many cities as possible in a stalker like manner, try to learn everything about the world and what's in it, travel to new places whilst staying out of the sun and worry about my weight and my hair.


Apparently, it has been observed and noted by others that I used to be really fun and happy and enjoy a lot of things, but of late, i've become somewhat melancholy. There are many reasons for this, and some of them might become evident over time, others are less obvious to others but to me are equally valid.

I see a lot less of my friends than I should although this often saddens me I also sometimes feel I have neither the energy nor the patience to be as good a friend to those I should be as they deserve of me.

But I am always open to invitations and also, you are always open to invite yourselves to my world...

I am very wary of trying to form any bonds or friendships with people I have not met or cannot meet, but I long for a place where perhaps I can be more honest and less dependent on the opinions of others for my esteem.

I value those of you who are able to give those honest opinions, and those of you whose wisdom and insight I cherish are always welcome in my life.


I sometimes rant and rave about the wonders of pigs and at other times complain bitterly about how cruel life has been to me. That's what i do, so don't be surprised.

I also can be fickle - cynicism has made me less tolerant of the wide eyed dreamy young things out there who feel it's all going to be brilliant once the weekend comes.

I'd rather sit down and talk to someone who has tempered their optimism with a few reality checks and setbacks and who prefer to consider the world in a way that is less simplistic than merely about where the next party is or how to get out of doing their physics homework.

So here, in my little space, are the myriad collection of people i know or have long known and loved, bands i adore, people i trust and believe in and those whose opinions matter to me, in one way or another....


I also really like new clothes. Love me? buy me clothes! :o)

I also keep a livejournal, if you are curious to see what things I witter about - I tend to update it more frequently than I do my blog here... but like everything in life, things rarely remain the same for long...


My Interests



so many interests, so little time!

good gigs make life worth living

80's music, addiction, ageing, alternative fashion, alternatives to western medicine, animal rights, anti-feminism, aubergines, beauty and ugliness, body image and dysmorphia, body modification, body piercing, burial rites, challenging social norms, changing my mind, childhood dreams, colonization and empire, crime, cruelty, cultural and social jargon, cultural anthropology, death and dying, death wishes, definitions of sanity, depression, diy clothes, drugs, ethnic identity, ethnicity and diversity, europe, f1, fabrics and textiles, fear, fear of slugs, film and filmstars, fishnet, furniture, gender bias, gigs, gin and slimline tonic, goths, hair extensions, hand bags, hello kitty, holidays, indie music from the 80's to early 90's, inner city deprivation culture, insanity, isabel allende, japan, joolz denby, laziness, lingerie, lip service clothing, major depression, make-up, makepovertyhistory, media and media studies, mental illness, modern cultural studies, modifying clothes, my friends, naps, norway, nynorsk and regional dialect, opium, oriental cooking, overanalytical writing, paradoxes, perfume, pharmacy, photography, physical geography, pigs, platform boots, poetry, pop culture, popular music studies, pre-christian scandianvian beliefs, pre-raphaelite art, psychotherapy, punk, pvc, reading, religions, richey james edwards, sadness and dysthymia, safety pins, sewing, shoes, shopping, sid vicious, silly hair, silver and modern jewellery, sleep, social phobia, strawberries, blueberries and other fruit, suicide and the art of death, sushi, sylvia plath, terminal illness, the architecture of churches, the art and style of food, the crusades, the development of revolutions, the evolution of style, the heart, the loss of innocence, the medicalization of beauty, the mysteries of london, the myth of prozac, the nature of despair, theories of human psychology, theories of social structure, third world health, tokyo, travel, trolls, unusual and quirky literature, urban landscapes, vegetables, vikings, weird clothes, whitby gothic weekend, writing.

and the list just grows and grows... though being a contrary sort, it also changes from minute to minute - one day i'll care deeply about aubergines and the next i'll not eat one for a month...

for such is my contrary nature...

I'd like to meet:

Robert Smith, Wayne Hussey and Ewan McGregor... mmm... ...actually, I'm not sure I'd know what to say to Robert Smith....

Actually, all the people i've met and liked over the last 10+ years and lost touch with - if you find my profile, and don't detest me yet/still... get in touch, please?!

If I don't know you, have never met you, or we don't have friends in common, I'm not likely to add you so don't bother asking.

If you're some mad bloke whose idea of meeting women is to send them illegible messages in bad English with no grasp of grammar or sentence structure, thinks they're a hot stud who will change my life or believe by virtue of some supposed material or intellectual ability you feel you can inspire me to see new paths in life, you're probably wrong, and wasting your time.

I'll only slag you off and laugh at your pathetic attempts at literacy and claims of an education and indeed, of having a life. Remember, there is such a thing as logic, and if you're not able to spell it, you probably need to go away and learn to do so.

Bands - Sorry, as with friends, I only add bands I know in person to this journal - so please don't ask


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"And alien tears will fill for him
Pity's long-broken urn,
For his mourners will be outcast men,
And outcasts always mourn"

Music:


new model army, the cure, the sisters of mercy, the mission, the cruxshadows, clan of xymox, all about eve, manuskript, suede, pulp, the smiths, swarf, sunshine blind, faith and the muse, metallica, manic street preachers, the clash, the jesus and mary chain, duran duran, rosetta stone, the tears, siouxsie and the banshees, bauhaus, bella morte, the horatii, dream disciples, the last dance, nick cave and the bad seeds, fields of the nephilim, cocteau twins, nirvana, the ghost of lemora, devilish presley and much much more.

Movies:

the deer hunter, the lost boys, pretty in pink, some kind of wonderful, papillon, taxi driver, trainspotting, ben hur, the towering inferno, angel heart, and probably many many more.... you expect me to remember all this stuff?!!

I'll come back to this one some day and think it through properly....

Television:

ER, 24, Angel, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, House MD, Law & Order: SVU, Cold Case, Criminal Minds, Bones, The 4400, Firefly, Babylon 5, CSI:Miami, CSI:Vegas, CSI:NY, Law & Order: Criminal Intent, Grey's Anatomy, Rome, NCIS, Lost, Charmed, F1 Grand Prix racing
....and those gritty documentaries set on impoverished housing estates about illness and drug abuse.

Books:

my favourite book:

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also, anything (almost) by Isabel Allende .. and Terry Pratchett .., rock biogs, books on kimono .., science .. and medicine .., ancient, mediaeval and modern history, anthropology .. and cultural studies .., sociology, humour and good novels. Trust me, no one can understand... for a flavour of what I'd like to read take a peek at my amazon wishlist...

future additions to my reading list
Essential reference books for everyone:

The Rough Guide to Europe ..

British National Formulary: v. 50 ..

Just a few of the books I've recently read:

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other recommended books I have enjoyed

Please take a look - it's very random but it represents some of the last 20 odd years of my reading pecadilloes...

see my wishlists for what else I one day hope to read!

Heroes:

bob geldof, sid vicious, robert smith, ice-t, richey james edwards, isabel allende, pete french... and all those people who successfully escaped the mundane trappings of daily life...

And above all, may we never forget the man who made us all love music more than life itself....

My Blog

That Which Remains!

new project from Andy Cousin of All About Evethat which remainsit’s great - have a listen???all spacey, atmospheric vocals over shoegazery music. oh noes! i used the word "shoegazery"!forgive me...
Posted by godgirl on Fri, 28 Mar 2008 05:20:00 PST

remember me?

remember the time that the sky went blackwe waited alone on the sandsremember the taste of the raging seabut nobody held out their handssomebody died for thissomebody diedfor just one kiss.....Damp Ju...
Posted by godgirl on Fri, 13 Jul 2007 05:10:00 PST

help stop cruelty to greyhounds

We the undersigned petition the Prime Minister to Stop allowing the racing greyhound industry to abandon/murder their dogs if they become unable to race. All dogs should be entitled to a pain free and...
Posted by godgirl on Fri, 02 Mar 2007 05:17:00 PST

of trouble and money and weather and what to wear...

i'm already £10 towards my cheque - they pay out when you reach £50 and the surveys are quick and simple so, everyone go and try out  your govtopical questions on various things, brand awareness ...
Posted by godgirl on Wed, 25 Oct 2006 09:58:00 PST

birthday personality meme

Your Birthdate: May 27You are a spiritual soul - a person who tries to find meaning in everything.You spend a good amount of time meditating, trying to figure out life.Helping others is also important...
Posted by godgirl on Tue, 27 Jun 2006 03:16:00 PST

public apology to toripink and dave hodder

I'm sorry. I'm sorry for hitting you both, shouting at you and ruining your evening on Tuesday.My behaviour was totally reprehensible and out of order and I understand that you have every reason and r...
Posted by godgirl on Thu, 04 May 2006 05:56:00 PST

the terrible things humans do to each other....

three things.1. intensively farmed beef - cruel to the animals, bad for the environment, and inherently unhealthy eaten in the vast quantities which it's being done in the west.2. intensive crop reari...
Posted by godgirl on Tue, 14 Mar 2006 07:05:00 PST

ARGH!

DAMNIT I'M HUNGRY!!!!...
Posted by godgirl on Wed, 08 Mar 2006 09:48:00 PST

*ARGH*

why does half my new profile keep vanishing when i scroll down it? anyone know how to stop it happening? you can't see anything but the first paragraph and the top of the head!   its here can any...
Posted by godgirl on Fri, 06 Jan 2006 11:05:00 PST

my new anything goes public myspace profile

yup! this one's for all those cool people who are not personal mates want to be my friend and meet me one day - but you're all welcome to add me if you're already my friend here - the more the merrier...
Posted by godgirl on Wed, 04 Jan 2006 06:21:00 PST