I can say without exaggeration that I could never love a human child as much as I love bourbon.
Bourbon, banked-track roller derby, cheese, school, gettin' paper, my wife, my mistress, wrestling, reading, Bust-A-Move on Super Nintendo, massages (sensual or otherwise), felines of all sizes and types, cold chillin', traveling, writing, free money, lap dances, fits of excess, correspondence, vocabulary excercises, discussions with people who have completely different points of view from my own, unpacking emotional baggage versus shoving more into the suitcases, my drunken alter ego, pocket flasks, pants that fit, men who are bigger and stronger than me, teaching, getting shit done, kickin' it with old people, drinking all afternoon, swimming, skating, forties, party barges, clear moonlit skies, and people who have low tolerances for bullshit
An intelligent man with a sense of humor. Must meet a height requirement of six feet or over.
Motherfucking Degrassi!
Valley of the Dolls by Jacqueline Susann, Eccentrics by David Weeks and Jamie James, Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand, Franny and Zooey by JD Salinger, Cunt by Inga Muscio, the Harry Potter Series, the Chronicles of Narnia and The Screwtape Letters by CS Lewis, The Great Shark Hunt by Hunter S. Thompson, The Red Tent by Anita Diamant, How To Make Love Like a Porn Star by Jenna Jameson, Exiles series by Melanie Rawn, The Once and Future King by T.H. White, All the Pretty Horses by Cormac McCarthy, Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen, The Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky, Gone With the Wind by Margaret Mitchell, The Apology by Plato
Jenna Jameson, Albus Dumbledore, William Jefferson Clinton, Augustus Bulleit, the factory workers in Lawrenceburg and Frankfort, Kentucky (you know who you are!), and Angela at Headhunters