Yvonne profile picture

Yvonne

IT WASN'T ME

About Me

Bianca, The most beautiful girl in my world, which is big. Let's help her win some Fu*k you Money!!! Click on her and vote. ;P
Do you know me personally? I mean, have we cut the cake together? uh...have we cut anything at all together? haha- if you say yes, then you DON'T know me. Alright alright, last time-know me? Then send me a message here -click the pic below- and I'll add you to my private profile:
Angel
I'm a serious wack job. I have a couple of screws missing. I know that I'm lewd and arrogant, vain and delusive, unrealistic and sometimes cruel. I'm not that smart. I speak fluent Spanish, but only when I'm drunk. I know about 50 impressive social phrases and my accent is Andalucian. I smoke. Almost anything that burns. I love men. It's a constant issue and it's tired. I speak about sex but loathe the complications...
I speak about sex as if I were Venus but in reality I'm Agnes of God. I mean, Lara Croft is my hero. Think about it. I'm gonna freak out when my looks start to go. I actually think they haven't gone yet. All the pictures on MySpace are of my next door neighbor. I steal poems from chapbooks and pretend that I wrote them. I actually meet people on the internet. I try to seduce them. They try to seduce the planet. It's strange...
I don't really think I would ever try to actually meet any of my new friends on MySpace. I think it's a conspiracy. I hate the word blog. It's ...dumb.


I'm very difficult and for the most part I have no idea how to make a man happy. I usually do everything wrong. I don't ever watch what I say and I get in trouble for it alot. I'm working on that. I'm a poet, I'm not used to censorship. But I'm trying because I am a dumb bitch that is the pitfall of all women and I should be murdered in my sleep, because as a human being I'm pretty goddamm worthless. I don't have any friends and only about 2 people talk to me as months go by.
My idea of foreplay was always a lobster dinner, but now it just taste like butter. I always hope to never wake up after I'm done with the salad. Days at a time I try to kill myself but I always fucking start laughing. ... I love high tide because the docks straighten up for girls in stilletto high heels...
br See my tennis shoe in the corner? The next time we see a pod of a hundred dolphins... I'm jumping in I swear to God!
Me and Baby Ren at Paradise Cove on Sin Prisa, right after surf skiing.
...in answer to a repeated question in my INBOX...Yes, all paintings on this page are originals and painted by my alter ego Yvonne Diva Vega, the humble painter, the goddess within the modest hottest part of the artist striving for non-recognition...huh? Translation: As a painter, I suck. I'm a much better poet. And get it straight, they are POEMS and never BLOGS.
I really look like this. Black don't crack, let me tell you. This blonde stuffs like mexican jumping beans jumpin' off my head. The bra has paint on it now and the lace is ripping in the back. Hercules can tow a boat swimming with the line between his teeth, you'd think he'd be able to unhook a little lacy thing... I know he just wants to hit me over the head with his club, but see I just click my tongue 'n sigh, reach back 'n unhook it for him, and it always makes him laugh... I escape the club and drag, I think that's the funny part.
Me and The Gabster
"Bamboo Moat & Tower, Drawbridge Not Included", Oil on canvas work in progress.

My Interests

Blaise Smith, my main squeeze... unconditional love. Unconditional genius.

Check out Blaise's Page, Click the pic below:

Sharon and I, The money Shot
Up at Edward's... Me, Sanel & Sharon

I looooove Mikki James... love him. Check him out Ladies... click the pic below:

At The Rainbow on Sunset with the girls.

Me and Bianca at Glamourcon,
Saturday night at Cabana(below), Hollywood hotspot. EVERYBODY is beautiful, even the busboys I tell you. But the Gabster and I... we still don't know how to act without our boyfriends. My favorite is pretending that we don't speak English..."Ah, lo siento pero jo no comprende.. mi amiga? Ella es Aleman, y no comprende tambien! QUE?...eh, si-bye-bye!" But dancing for depression, beats the shit out of Haagen Daas...
..And did you know that when ostriches are being hunted, they bury their heads in the sand because they think they can't be seen?

I'd like to meet:

JESUS FUCKING CHRIST. (no impostors, no saviors) And that's the only man I want to meet so he can tell me all the jokes he's heard about himself because I was REALLY looking for a man that could make me laugh... and never cry. YEP- someone funnier than me.

Okay this is the only difference now: I don't want to meet the Lord anymore. I just want his 3 loaves of bread and his power to command swine to jump off cliffs.
Musicians, artists, poets, jazzsters, millionaires in overalls, I don't fucking know anymore. BABIES. If you're a lido baby, I want to squeeeze you. Women with free spirit beauty and art spirits, humor, sister ya-ya ga-ga, party favors, bitchen clothes, creative flair, and those kittens with the ability to wear their beauty well... and long lost cousins with their own bread.
Oh. And no drug addicts, just master moderators that understand the intrinsics of electrolytes, soy products and bananas...

Angels, Artists and Avengers... swimmers at the deep end... New self-Portrait entitled, "See, I Really Do Give A Shit"

Music:


The girls copied me and fell in love, and they are NO WHERE do you hear me - to be found. But they'll be back unless they are in that fraction where sometimes relationships actually do work? I don't know, it is a very small fraction...SHIT OR GET OFF THE POT DAMMIT... Update(11/11/07: ...told you- they're back. The girls are back and not even jaded. haha a little disappointed but the fish are jumpin' and life is good.

Oh and one more thing, beware of men that show any hint of knowing the Price of Everything, and the Value of NOTHING, Beware of women that don't have lots of girlfriends. They're full of shit and will steal your fake Rolex like a Mexican wanna be from right under your eyes. then they'll email your boyfriend... With Gabrielle and Sublime in a Postcard from Venice Beach, Cali These girl rock, nothing but good fun, positive attitudes and seriously funny without trying too hard Well, margaritas and Bloody Marys help.
Beauty Tip of the day 1. On Staying Young forever: Escape to a tropical climate and become an Island of Hibiscus, be the Child you will Always Be... then run and play until the planet takes on that Crimson and Violet Sigh... Stay the Island if You can for When you must return. oil on canvas... Self-Portrait "Couldn't Get Away"
My A&M Records music video with Herb Alpert, when I was still a baby and hip hop was hoppin'
: "Jumpstreet"
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Add to My Profile | .... .. Allman Brothers, Antonio Jo Bim, Astrud Gilberto, Audioslave, Brad Mehldau, BlackEyed Peas, Blaise Smith, Blondie, Bob Dylan Cat Stevens, The Clash, Charles Mingus, Chet Baker, Cibo Matto, Coltrane, Digable Planets, Danny Peck, David Bowie, Earth, Wind & Fire, Ella Fitzgerald, English Beat, Erik Satie, Frank Zappa, George Benson, George Michael, Grand Funk Railroad, Grover Washington Jr., Heart, Iggy Pop, Jao Gilberto, Jah-Rule, Jamiriquoi, Jeff Buckley, Joe Jackson, Kenny Garret, KRS-one, Kenny Rankin, Led Z., Madonna, Malo, Mary Jane Girls, Marvin Gaye, Mose Allison, Nancy Wilson, Nirvana, No Doubt, Nora Jones, Ozomatli, Outkast, Plimsouls,

Movies:

Being There. Don Juan de Marco. Anything with Johnny Depp. Legends of The Fall. Way of The Gun. Every vampire moveie ever made.

Television:

Loathe Television. I can tolerate Weeds, and Entourage is so LALA how could I not love it? I'm a sucker for shots of my hometown haunts or any indiginous and favorite hole in the wall like Crazy Girls.

Books:

Against Forgetting -Forsche. On The Road -J.K. The White Goddess. Every thing by Robert Graves. The Vampire Chronicles. Geisha. So many really... love art books, have a good collection

Heroes:

Laura Croft. Lord Byron

My Blog

After all These Years

This is a message I just got this morning. Lobace is talking about a time we all hung out around 10 years ago. I  must say, even if it take 10 years to let someone know you appreciate them... do ...
Posted by Yvonne on Thu, 27 Dec 2007 11:23:00 PST

A Real Bad Boy

I like bad boys, but, I like the real kind. Not the little guys that act bad and wear bad boy accessories, like blue steel and bandanas... But the kind you would never suspect. He wears black leathe...
Posted by Yvonne on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

In Being My Fathers Daughter

Because laying on the bare hardwood floor is too gentle and aesthetic and still does not offer that masochistic solace, and because crawling under the bed to weep is only an instinctive feral urge,...
Posted by Yvonne on Thu, 10 May 2007 12:27:00 PST

Evening Heat

In the evening heat, under sweat clinging sheets, with a mini-blind moonlight shower, I sleep... Interval sleep, first light then deep, I am awakened by a small boy's grinding teeth, and the pa...
Posted by Yvonne on Fri, 07 Sep 2007 11:29:00 PST

The Viper

Viper Surfboards and GearWas the logo on the T-shirtIn the classes' first line formation: to cut hair.So, now they call him "the Viper",Little Brother, local boy, surfer,From the day he could walk,He'...
Posted by Yvonne on Sat, 08 Sep 2007 06:13:00 PST

Espana

  ESPANA   There's a dark thing lurking beneath the eaves of a red tiled roof. The dogs are disturbed as the dark thing sweeps swiftly past. The dogs are barking, sounding alarms, warning o...
Posted by Yvonne on Sat, 08 Sep 2007 06:09:00 PST

Happy Easter

I like Jesus, eggs, and the spring equinox.I like pretty frilly dresses as long as they look like lingerie,  the church of believing in anything, I like believers.Happy Easter Bianca, Blaise, Ch...
Posted by Yvonne on Sun, 08 Apr 2007 11:14:00 PST

Merilene M. Murphy R.I.P.

    When Merilene Comes Marchin' In The muse of Merilene Is left behind and seeks adoption. Yet there is not one I can name worthy of the option. Requirements to collaborate, include the abi...
Posted by Yvonne on Thu, 15 Mar 2007 08:01:00 PST

Life Is Good

  I just wanna spew words right now. so... if I start a typing rhythm and if by the fifth line I'm still living "Everything before that, is throw away." A poem arises from it's birth grave word ...
Posted by Yvonne on Thu, 08 Mar 2007 07:52:00 PST

A Fucking 6-Pack

A Fucking 6 Pack   Wild- It's happening again. This time I never saw it coming. This time, I'd started running not knowing I was being chased by a midget voo-doo madman just like in Tales From ...
Posted by Yvonne on Mon, 12 Feb 2007 02:44:00 PST