Jessica Fletcher profile picture

Jessica Fletcher

Who else but a bosum buddy will tell you how rotten you are?

About Me


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My name is Fletcher, Jessica Fletcher: author and crime solver extrordinaire. I have old friends all over the world and enjoy visiting them as much as possible. However, often when I visit my old friends it turns out they are murderers. I don't really know why they invite me to stay when they are planning a murdering spree because I always grass them to the police - thats the JB Fletcher way.I have a nephew called Grady. He is always murdering people, and I have to cover up for him by telling the police one of my old friends did it - and they always believe Jessica- ha ha ha.I have various cousins and distant relatives who are all identical to me, and have the most bizarre Irish accents ever heard.I find crime solving an enjoyable passtime, and not to difficult. Once I find out who did it they don't ever bother to lie, and they kindly explain their motives thoroughly. My nemesis is the dastardly Dr Mark Sloan and his evil clone Dick Van Dyke.
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I want to find out just how much people love me

How good a detective do you think I am?
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Excellent
Magnificant
The best detective in the world
Far better than that Miss Marple
You are so good I would like your babies please Mrs Fletcher
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My Interests

Being nosy, poking into other peoples business, visiting old friends, sometimes bumping someone off myself (then I say that wolves did it), writing on my type-writer, being Cabot Coves only celebrity, my magnifying glass collection, the feel of my leatherette gloves

I'd like to meet:

Old friends, Grady, Magnum PI, fellow detectives
What do you enjoy doing Prying, Poking, Putting my friends in jail
What is your profession Writer, detective
Likes Solving crimes
Dislikes Policemen who tell me to stop interfering, Dr Mark Sloan
Favorite Place Cabot Cove, The Morgue
Favorite People The Sheriff who was in Happy Days, Grady, My Old Friends
Ever tried drugs? When Dr Mark Sloan spiked my cocoa with LSD
Ever stolen anything? Evidence
Proudest Moment Beating Dr Mark Sloan at a Cockney Accent Competetion
Worst Moment When Omar Shariff stole a whole murder episode off me, the gap toothed bastard

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http://www.myheritage.com

Music:

"Murder, She Wrote" by Chaka Demus & Pliers, The "Mame" Soundtrack, Sweeney Todd and anything by the delightful Angela Lansbury

Movies:

Bedknobs and Broomsticks, Beauty and the Beast

Television:

Happy Days with the charming Tom Bosley

Books:

Mine, "The Famous Five", "Secret Seven", and anything else by Enid Blyton

Heroes:

Sherlock Holmes, Angela Lansbury (I think she is my long lost twin)

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My Blog

People losing their grip on reality

I had yet another email today that enquired in all seriousness as to whether I am the "real Jessica Fletcher", and it has had me questioning the sanity of my online aquaintances. So to avoid this happ...
Posted by Jessica Fletcher on Mon, 05 Feb 2007 05:07:00 PST

Jessica's Competition

Hello there my dear friends, As you may have observed on my profile I have a celebrity look a like montage type thing, but it is shit as none of them actually resemble me (poor deprived people). ...
Posted by Jessica Fletcher on Wed, 10 Jan 2007 07:43:00 PST

A shameful thing I did when I was a young, struggling detective

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Posted by Jessica Fletcher on Thu, 09 Nov 2006 02:43:00 PST

Once Upon A Time.................

Hello all,I have finished my new book, and thought I would let you read it here first.Once upon a time Jessica, the best detective in the universe, went to England. She went to a public house somewher...
Posted by Jessica Fletcher on Tue, 07 Nov 2006 02:03:00 PST

I got tagged

I got tagged!Here is the gist of the game: I'm tagged, so I tell 6 things about myself that people don't know. You know, those secret things, and then I tag 6 people. They in turn have to humiliate th...
Posted by Jessica Fletcher on Mon, 06 Nov 2006 03:15:00 PST

What Mark Sloan tried to do to me...........

Well, I was just having a little nose around a hospital ( as I had an afternoon free), when I bumped into my arch enemy DR MARK SLOAN, the tap dancing bastard himself. I politely said "Good-day ...
Posted by Jessica Fletcher on Sun, 29 Oct 2006 05:58:00 PST