Making out, ejaculating, sleeping, lying around in bed on Sundays naked, smoking clowns like you on the b-ball court, getting drunk and being annoying, throwing butterscotch candies at lions, suing people because my baby is slightly warmer than usual, passing out and getting rolled down a hill with a hot dog in my pants, changing song lyrics so that they're dirty, riding my bike, reading stuff, listening to the NPR, nearly getting killed all the time in a series of ever-more incredible accidents, going to the gym, cuddling/snuggling, etc.
John Hodgman. He's funny.
Richard Youngs, The Ink Spots, Spacemen 3, Bo Diddley, Grand Puba, AC/DC, the Rolling Stones, the Spits, the Jesus Lizard, Led Zeppelin, Laughing Hyenas, Country Teasers, COWS, Baseball Furies, LIVEFASTDIE, ZZ Top, AFrames, the Tinklers, Hugh Masekela, Thee Oh Sees, Flipper, Nina Simone, Unrest, Bassholes, Gibson Brothers, Kool G Rap, Pussy Galore, Devin The Dude, feedtime, Cat Power, Diamond D, The Scientists, Half Japanese, Ghostface, Showbiz and A.G., the Fall, Wire, DEVO, Unsane, the Pulsars, SWANS, Lightnin' Hopkins, Jay Reatard, Galaxie 500, Drunks With Guns, Starlite Desperation, Liqourball, Thin Lizzy, TV on the Radio, that KMD record that never came out, Killed By Death-style R & R, slow-jams, The Funk, the Hip-Hop, 50's thru early 70's Jazz, blah, blah, blah, etc.
The Devils, The Wild Bunch, Cool Hand Luke, The Fallen Idol, The Bad Sleep Well, The Power Of Nightmares, High Plains Drifter, A Face in the Crowd, Mr. Jealousy, The Lives Of Others, The Sweet Smell of Success, The Trial, This Sporting Life, Bad Day At Black Rock, 8 1/2, Black Sunday, Paris Texas, Lisa and the Devil, Amateur, The Squid and the Whale, I Heart Huckabees, Living In Oblivion, the Acid Eaters, Bottle Rocket, the 10th Victim, Le Corbeau, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Henry Fool, Glengarry Glenn Ross, The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly, Serpico, Videodrome, Scanners, the Ice Storm, Hard Eight, The Third Man, Mean Streets, Raging Bull, the Tin Drum, 40 Year Old Virgin, Boogie Nights, Death Dream, Flirting with Disaster, Repo Man, Once Upon A Time In The Old West, Rushmore, Fast Times At Ridgemont High, Evilspeak, Hot Rod, Superbad, Knocked Up, No Country For Old Men, "F" For Fake!, 70s and 80s horror movies, etc.
The Great Nanny-Off!, Fox 6 Wake-Up Funtime Sunshine Newspals, Rich Kids With Stupid Problems!, Abortion Island!, Will They Eat It?!, Aqua-Nannies!, Pimp My Sister!, Celebrity Nanny Court!, Vatican Idol!, Look What I Own!, Vapid Shit Head Dance-Off!, Nanny-Bot 3000!, Tiny Penis Intervention Team!, Grandma Swapperz!, Poor People Screaming at Each Other and Throwing Chairs!, Nanny Squad: the Next Generation(!), that millionaire that dresses like a hick and hates the brown people and the queers and says "Git-R-Done!" all the time...gosh, he's a riot!, Too many Nannies!, Chef Shouty!, Nanny Or No Nanny!, Cars Driving In Circles!, Naked Teen Or Cop?, etc.
Tom Frank, HST, Harry Crews, Lewis Lapham, Sam Harris, Albert Camus, Paul Bowles, Raymond Carver, "40 Days and 40 Nights" by Matthew Chapman, that Miles Davis autobiography is a trip, etc.
Subcomandante Marcos, Miles Davis, Michael Gira, Charles Schulz, Rosey Greer, Bill Moyers, et. al