Valerie Anne

We are a Member Owned Group of Domestic Violence Survivors that Support each other in our day to day healing process. We have Survivors and Victims alike in our group. We welcome men and woman in any abusive relationship, with one goal in mind. Freedom from Abuse.United as one we plan to:Raise awareness regarding domestic violence, stalking, and abuse.Bring the community as a whole together to fight Domestic Violence.Work with other agencies, police departments, resources in our areas, towards understanding and ending domestic violence.Educate Victims, Survivors, their family and loved ones, the public and schools in the identification, dangers, effects, prevention, outcomes and safety.Educate the public by publicizing and getting actively involved with the community regarding domestic violence, abuse, stalking, and their effects and misconceptions that are held, as well as prevention and safety.Provide a safe forum where victims, survivors, advocates and their loved ones can actively and anonymously participate with others, share their experiences, grow in their healing, and obtain valuable information as well as share support.Gather together as much information and have it available to the public in a easy to find manor.Empower victims and survivors through positive interaction, re-enforcement, resources and support.Show that no-one is alone, and that no-one deserves to be abused.Get out the message that "There is no SHAME in being abused, only SHAME in the ABUSER!!!I believe that friends are quiet Angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly."Author Unknown

STAGES A BATTERED WOMAN MAY GO THROUGH1. Deniala) Try to forget the incident(s) b) Try to excuse/explain the abuse c) Minimize the frequency/severity of abuse2. Blaming selfa) If I hadn't nagged, phoned a friend, gone shopping, he wouldn't have hit me b) If I had kept the children quieter, cleaned house better, had a different meal prepared c) If I were a better, prettier, smarter, thinner, fatter person, he wouldn't have abused me d) If I knew what he wanted e) I haven't tried hard enough3. Desire to Salvage the Relationshipa) Now that I understand him better, I can behave differently - better b) Since I am making changes, he will too c) It is safe to go home4. Angera) I don't have to take it b) I don't deserve to be beaten c) Why does he take it out on me? d) I won't let him beat me again e) Get an Order of Protection - file charges f) File for divorce5. Feara) He will hurt my children, family, friends b) He said he will never let me go c) He'll follow me and beat or kill me d) He will commit suicide6. Depressiona) Low energy b) Sleep / eating disorders c) Suicidal thoughts d) Nightmares e) Hypersensitivity f) Headaches g) Bland emotional expression7. Helplessness/Hopelessnessa) Low self-esteem b) No income, job, housing c) I can't make it on my own d) No one can help me