any two johns of equal or lesser value! profile picture

any two johns of equal or lesser value!

any one who never came out there ears isn't doing it right

About Me

I didn't drink until I was 21, I didn't loose my virginity till 4 months after that, I have a 7.5 in. cock and tend to masterbate twice a day, (once when I wake up once when I go to bed) I stopped eating sugar about a year and a half ago but I still eat Catsup, and have lost about 110 lbs. I was 350 now I'm 240. (give or take a cheeseburger)I don't have a car so I walk everywhere, witch has made my legs a force to reckend with. I'm a bouncer at a local bar called "Sirens" but it doesn't pay enough so I'm also a dishwasher at a place called "the Fountain" (not that the pay is low I make 12.00 an hr. but I only work there two days a week) My girlfriend and I broke up around July and I haven't pulled myself out of that yet (I am trying though) the chances of me finding another girl right for me look pretty slim. I live in a house with a bunch of other people and pay 250 a month(not counting bills) The cash I don't spend on rent and food usually ends up going towards comic books and stuff to use in costumes (I pride myself on my award winning costumes) and will take any excuse to get dressed up. My dad was a farmer/artist who died on 9/11 (he shot himself) and my mom is a cook/dental assistant who recently moved to Albuquerque. I have two half brothers in there 40s ones a ninth grade science teacher and the other is a musician in San Francisco and I have a sister who also lives in Albuquerque, And two sisters in D.C. I'm not good with girls, having been an overweight introverted outcast for most of my life but because the weight loss I have been learning the fine art of flirting and social diplomacy(I still suck)but no longer act like a creepy slug, still I'm very shy and don't talk much. I'm a great artist, everyone says so I've drawn several comics and comic strips including a long running comic strip called "Tao of College" but I haven't been drawing as much and I'm afraid that my talent is fading I blame my new life but its to fun to stop. recently I grew an abscess In my molar and had to go to the hospital I am now looking for funding to go to the dentist and have it fixed, it was really gross it had a hard black quarter sized lump with puss reaching out on my cheek to the side of my lip.

My Interests

comics, smoking crack, chicken strips and cock rings... so many cock rings.

I'd like to meet:

a girl who: 1).likes comics(has a top five tpb/gn)if you don't know what that means then you've already lost 2).is not afraid of my dick (it's kinda big) 3).no more than four years younger than me(18) and no more than five years older than me(27) 4).considers themselves at least a "7" on the hot scale (I do) 5).not a "goth","hippie","jock",or "thug" just a normal girl (is that really so hard?) 6).likes to have fun, read: not antisocial 7). ether does or is cool with drinking and smoking pot 8).Is confident in her actions but not a control freak 9).Is not still "owned" by her parents 10).I don't have any more I guess I'm not that picky.:D

Music:

I sold the bass guitar that I couldn't play to pay rent so that should tell you how much I'm into music, but as for my likes I guess; Miles Davis, the Pillows, reckless Eric (but only "whole wide world"), the buzzcocks,elis e tom (aguas de março), Shirley C. Lime and the Lemons, Shark Shark, William Shatner, and Brian Eno, but not necessarily in that order.

Movies:

1). The apartment 2). Rules of attraction 3). Safe house 4). Idol hands 5). Hackers 6). the Big Lebowski 7). stranger than fiction 8). Primers 9). the Wild One 10).Night Watch

Television:

1).Firefly(FOX) 2).Psyche(USA) 3).stella(Comedy) 4).Mr. Show(HBO) 5).the Morgan Waters show (CBC) 6).Futurama(FOX) 7).Yam Roll(CBC) 8).Dr. Who(BBC) 9).Greg the Bunny(IFC) 10).the Riches (FX)

Books:

1).the Rum Diarys- H.S. Thompson 2).My Wicked ways- Erol Flinn 3).the Resturaunt at the end of the universe- Scot Adams 4).Heavy Metal: the Sky Dolls- Barbucci & Canepa 5).the Delta of Venius- Anias Nin 6).farewell my lovely-Ramond Chandler 7).skinny legs and all- Tom Robbins 8).watchmen- Allen Moore 9). the phantom tollbooth- Norton Juster 10).on the road- jack Kerouack

Heroes:

there are no heroes.

My Blog

doomed

This sucks, ever sense Cadi left me I've been super horny, I mean realy horny. I mean I've been masterbating about seven times a day, but I dont realy have the social skills to "seal the deal" even wh...
Posted by any two johns of equal or lesser value! on Sun, 05 Aug 2007 07:34:00 PST

muntant 5

NAME: Comstock, Thomas POWER LEVEL: 3 TYPE: phisical, sonic, Offensive LETHAL DESCRIPTION: voice box resonates on all frequency due to phisical mutation DATE OF POWER BIRTH: 10/28/03 M.R.A.(MUTANT RE...
Posted by any two johns of equal or lesser value! on Mon, 23 Jul 2007 05:55:00 PST

after lafter come tears

Cadi left me.  she had been avoiding me for about two weeks and I had been reciving a real weird vibe from her so it wasn't a supprise but it still hurt. She sad that sometimes she felt unco...
Posted by any two johns of equal or lesser value! on Mon, 23 Jul 2007 05:37:00 PST

to all you new mother fuckers!

hey there all you freshfaced frends of yor. I have decided to go out and find all my old friends from back in the day and try to re-open comunications with them. If I havent talked to you personaly ye...
Posted by any two johns of equal or lesser value! on Fri, 03 Nov 2006 07:45:00 PST

bad me

I ate a cupcake last night. yeah I know and I was doing so well =( but I fugure if I get right back to it this shouldnt set me back more than a quarter pound right? its not like I'll gain five pounds ...
Posted by any two johns of equal or lesser value! on Thu, 19 Oct 2006 08:24:00 PST

nope... nothing

I have nothing to say. Not a thing, matter a fact if some one had less to say than I do than they would most likely be very boring... veeerrry boring. Yep realy realy boring, or maby dead, no bec...
Posted by any two johns of equal or lesser value! on Thu, 05 Oct 2006 08:05:00 PST

mutant 3

NAME: Jordan, Robin (Rubix)POWER LEVEL: 4TYPE: Phyiscail , Offensive LETHALDESCRIPTION: Alcoholic substance sucreeted from handsDATE OF POWER BIRTH: 8/14/93M.R.A. (MUTANT REGISTRATION ACT)#: 28-549283...
Posted by any two johns of equal or lesser value! on Sat, 30 Sep 2006 01:20:00 PST

mutant 2

*NAME: Frederickson, Johnny POWER LEVEL: 7TYPE:Horse ElementalDESCRIPTION: power over HorsesDATE OF POWER BIRTH: 5/27/87M.R.A. (MUTANT REGRISTRATION ACT)#: N.A.MILITARY SERVICE: Comander and Chief Wor...
Posted by any two johns of equal or lesser value! on Sat, 30 Sep 2006 12:45:00 PST

mutant 4

NAME: Shelton, Jerry (host)POWER LEVEL: 4TYPE: psycic,Offensive non-lethalDESCRIPTION: compleat control of a persons bodyDATE OF POWER BIRTH: 7/2/03M.R.A.(MUTANT REGISTRATION ACT): 43-722354-0000-4261...
Posted by any two johns of equal or lesser value! on Sat, 30 Sep 2006 01:48:00 PST

"fat cat rescue" success!

fat cat found! first thought to be kind of cute then appon further review just found to be a little gross " Its fat... and its a cat... thats about it." Brian Higgins witnes....
Posted by any two johns of equal or lesser value! on Wed, 27 Sep 2006 02:02:00 PST