Comedy Central Democrat - ProfilesArchive

About Me

Basically I'm a bad ass white girl who's gonna party like it's ... hold up, it is! Ahhhhhhhhhhhh! Damn, I'm funny! I'm into clubbin' and chuggin' beers. -FYI- Don't be frontin'. You be bringin' your week as shiznit, I'll wreck you with my hard ass rhymes.

My Interests

I'm interested in kicking ass and taking names. Also, I enjoy spending quiet evenings on the porch, widdling wood.

I'd like to meet:

I'd like to meet Hitler so I can kick him in the balls.

Music:

My music drives me. I guess that makes the group Nelson the pilots of my life. I love those guys, and they are SEXY! (Even though I typically like spanish men with mustaches.)

Movies:

Flash Gordon

Television:

Pacific Blue. It's not on anymore. Good thing I recorded all the episodes on VHS tapes. (I'm into technology; BIG TIME!) Wow, what a sweet show. Nothing says action like cops on bicylces. Also, I'm really into WWE Monday Night Raw. Raw is war, bitches!!

Books:

Between watching wrestling, clubbin', kicking ass, taking names, working on my truck, widdling wood, and drinking a shitload of beers(everyday), I don't have time for no damn books. Shoot, learnin' is overrated anyway.

Heroes:

My hero is Lil' Kim. That bitch is hardcore like me!

My Blog

My Report Is In: Maverick Killed Goose

Let me start off by saying, I'm no rookie when it comes to jets. I own the movie Top Gun, and I've seen all the Iron Eagles. I have the Top Gun video game, and I recent...
Posted by Comedy Central Democrat on Fri, 04 Aug 2006 07:37:00 PST

I is what I is

Here is a piece of an email I recently sent to one of my friends. "Shit, when we went to Canada and my husband ended up in the ER for 8 hours, that hospital bill was 38 bucks. ...
Posted by Comedy Central Democrat on Fri, 01 Dec 2006 08:49:00 PST

I am so McGyver

This morning while I was dipping into my chaw can for my post-breakfast chew, I spilled a piece of glorious satisfaction into my keyboard. (I know I should be chewing Bandits at work. ...
Posted by Comedy Central Democrat on Mon, 16 Oct 2006 08:37:00 PST

Husband, you sucker!

I think it was sometime during spring cleaning in 2005 when I realized my husband's golf bag looked lonely in our garage. It would look so cute if we had his and hers golf sets on display! ...
Posted by Comedy Central Democrat on Tue, 10 Oct 2006 07:25:00 PST

Bill's Twins

Posted by Comedy Central Democrat on Fri, 22 Sep 2006 11:49:00 PST

Cha Ching

I am not afraid to over tip. 15%? Only if your service sucks! Hell, I'm not afraid to throw out 16 17.5% for good service. I guess you can call me a giver. I will modes...
Posted by Comedy Central Democrat on Fri, 15 Sep 2006 08:33:00 PST

Good One, God. You Got Me!

Everyone poops, right? So why is it, every time I buy toilet paper, I feel completely humiliated? Perhaps, just because everyone does poop, that doesn't make it acceptable. After all...
Posted by Comedy Central Democrat on Fri, 01 Sep 2006 12:23:00 PST

King Kong My Ass!

Everyone knows that the king of the jungle is always a lion. Well, everyone but Hollywood. As if the radical monkey lovers of Hollywood hadn't gone far enough with Planet of...
Posted by Comedy Central Democrat on Mon, 21 Aug 2006 11:22:00 PST

They Don't Make Me Like They Used To

At a young age, I was very intrigued by the martial arts. More specifically, I became fixated with ninjas, and established a goal to become one. Despite my lobbying, my parents never shipp...
Posted by Comedy Central Democrat on Fri, 11 Aug 2006 11:35:00 PST

Say It Ain't So, Floyd!

With the recent failed drug test to Tour de France champion Floyd Landis, cycling has finally been dethroned as America's favorite sport. Prior to the positive test, to witness th...
Posted by Comedy Central Democrat on Mon, 07 Aug 2006 01:25:00 PST