I am part Tsalagi, French and Scotch-Irish descent but my heart and soul is 110% American Indian and devoted to my journey in relation to my heritage to honor my ancestors, the traditions, ceremonies and spirituality of my people.
To walk with the earth rather than upon it. To hold all that is sacred and cherish it.
We have endured so much and yet we are still here.
I took the name Eagle_Wolf (Wehali_Waya) from my French character name of Amoux which in French means Eagle Wolf.
Oh, and by the way my great grandmother was NOT a Cherokee Princess. LOL
Here is my life story that I wrote for William, my friend, my brother for his web site Lakota writings.
you can find it here.
http://www.lakotawritings.com/Present_Day_People_of_Turtle_I
sland.htm
Wehali-Waya (Eagle-Wolf).A mother stands at the door telling the little boy to come in; 'it’s too cold outside and your going to get sick,' he is gazing up at the sky loving the feeling of fresh snow upon his upturned face. She also calls to him after the passing of winter, when the days are hotter, to come in where it’s cooler and that it’s too hot to play outside. He faces the sun with his eyes closed loving the feeling of the warm sun upon his skin. He loves spending his time outdoors.
He uses a broom and covers to make a teepee in the living room rather than using chairs and covers to make a tent. He loves this dwelling. He sits in front of the TV yelling in vane for victory for the Indian’s, knowing that the cowboys dressed in white always get the “Savagesâ€. He knows in his heart why the Indians fight, it for their survival, their way of life and what is rightfully theirs.
He watches in fascination as the dancers dance to the beat of drums wearing beautifully colored traditional Indian regalia. He holds his newly bought plastic tomahawk tight in his hands as his family drives away from the reservation.
He is constantly searching the skies for large majestic birds. When visiting the zoos, he is enthralled to see the animals, but his heart aches for them being caged the way they are, for he knows how they are feeling. He loves Mother Earth’s creatures. He picks up trash as he walks home from school. He loves the environment.
Years later, when he has grown to be a man, some of those feelings have faded, replaced by feelings that all adolescence have, other issues came into his life. He came to be a man at an early age, for he was but a kid himself when he had to become the responsible one. He raised his children in the way he knew was right. He taught them respect. He taught them to honor their elders and grandparent. He taught them to care for the world and it’s creatures. He, however never taught them about the Indians…. For it was unknown to him where he came from.
That little boy was me. It was in the year of 1999 that I became interested in genealogy. I started attending several family reunions on my Dad’s side and met many elders there that have been studying our family history for many years. My mother and father divorced many years ago when I was very young. I found it very intriguing that my grandmother was full blood French and that way back my ancestors were Scotch-Irish. It became an obsession as to when and from where my ancestors came to this land, and the history of my French grandmother that had died during childbirth. I never saw a picture of her until the year 2001. I held that picture with the most care and fascination knowing this person was a part of me. I gained lots of information from my father’s side but my mom’s side remained empty.
Delving into my mom’s side I found there were hidden secrets. I was reminded of a visit that my mom, step-dad, siblings and I took to Tennessee to visit an old man and his wife. That man was my true great grandfather from my mom’s side. You see, my grandmother’s new husband had adopted her as a small child and given his name. It was then that I discovered the true blood that ran in my veins. The blood of Tsalagi, the blood of Cherokee.
I have looked back at my life and now know why I felt and believed the way that I did about the American Indians. The want and need of the Indian way has always been with me. It has become an obsession to know my true ancestors and the history behind them. The name Eagle-Wolf comes from my way of life and the way I think.
The Eagle represents the patience that I have always had. The feeling of wanting to be alone at times but also taking care of my young. The understanding to accept whatever comes my way.
The Wolf represents the nurturing side of me with my family. The care of protecting my family and feeding them taking what is left over. The balances of being independent but accepting help as well.
Looking back into my life, it is all about understanding why the Great Spirit has put upon me all the obstacles in my life. Perhaps to test my loyalty and spirit and to allow me to truly understand what it is to be of Indian descent.
My soul cries to rid myself of this technological concrete prison we call civilization and get back to the old ways of life. The freedom to roam when and where I wish, the need to smell the fresh air and taste of the pristine waters. To become self sufficient rather than rely upon someone else for my own survival. All these needs run through my heart and soul for I am Cherokee, I am Tsalagi I am Wehali-Waya, I am Eagle-Wolf.
