The Bartoszian Way profile picture

The Bartoszian Way

Just jot me down on your to do: list

About Me

Voted "Time" Magazine's "Most Promising Young Despot 2005" Working as an Arts Manager Filmmaker and the Next Big Thing in art and design circles. I am steadily amassing the hordes who will assist me in the enslavement of this puny planet. When not plotting the deaths of billions, I like to travel... space... time... the usual daytrips to some backwater asteroid / moon /ball of dirt for the torture and exploitation of its "indigenous life forms" I like ducks, rayguns, starships, skateboards, zombies, and the subjugation of "lesser species" .. width="425" height="350" ..

My Interests

Being an Arts Manager is both fun AND dangerous. With the Arts being such a scary and litigious place, I must rely on my ninja skills of invisibility and proposal writing to keep me from being done in by the everpresent threat of Arthouse Fuckery and being bought out by SuperWalCoSoftMcDisneyBucks. Luckily, Violence and fear are great motivators, and I strongly suggest learning how to use these valuable tools.I produce guerrilla films, and other ultra low budget flix. It's fun, rewarding, and gets you laid by self conscious "indie" chicks with no self esteem!I'm currently designing advanced weapons systems for the highest bidder as well as attending the prestigious Emily Carr Hipster Academy of Art and Design."If I had a dollar for every gallon of blood I've spilled or every atom I've smashed."

I'd like to meet:

Batman, John Cash, Billionaire Adventurer Sir Richard Branson, The Donald, Burt Rutan, Dave Suzuki, Paul Allen, Stanislaw Lem, Jim Henson, Kim Jong il, Richard Cheese, Darth Vader, Pat Bateman, Georgie Lucas, Tommy Savini. Women who like vain, brilliant, despotic, controlling, manipulative time travelling men.

Music:

From Disco to Metal. As long as it rocks. Humble Rodent, Heavy Metal Airship, The Sect of the Indigo Clam, The Motor City Serpents, Ween, Holy Rock Operators, etc. etc. etc.

Movies:

Strange Days, Snakes on a Plane, Lost in Translation, Night of the Living Dead (original) Batman, Back to the Future, Revenge of the Nerds. Other crap you probably have never heard of.

Television:

Space Channel. Independent Film Channel. Al-Jazeera. Pimp my (insert clever noun here) Star Trek. Anything depicting the pain of the innocent.

Books:

Lots

Heroes:

Batman, Billionaire Adventurer Sir Richard Branson, Burt Rutan, Dave Suzuki, Darth Vader. Pol Pot, Stalin, Hitler (because he's a quarter jewish) Zorg, Alex the Great.

My Blog

Yesterday...

I played a pretty good prank. I had a few of my friends absolutely convinced (mostly) that I was about to get married to my red hot smoking french (from fucking france) girlfriend. What a little troop...
Posted by The Bartoszian Way on Mon, 02 Apr 2007 09:25:00 PST

Xmas in Paris

some of youi may already know, but I've decided to blog it, just in case a bulletin gets lost in the flow of information...I'm getting married.... in paris over xmasWeee.PSShe's smoking hot.... of cou...
Posted by The Bartoszian Way on Sun, 01 Apr 2007 12:51:00 PST

Hurtin' Albertan

2200 Kilometers in 22 hours was pretty much the extent of my weekend. It started at 10 am, with me and the company van barreling down the Trans Canada and then the #5 North to Jasper. 11 hours, a coup...
Posted by The Bartoszian Way on Sun, 11 Feb 2007 05:56:00 PST

A Long Haul

So I'm gonna miss my chance for crazy Viagra induced sex with drunk art school hipster chicks. Instead I will be ripping down the highway towards the wasteland of Edmonton. I've got a pocket full of p...
Posted by The Bartoszian Way on Thu, 08 Feb 2007 12:15:00 PST

Humping Heard

So after moving my crap into the new place, I come to the realisation that i am incredibly bored. Not only that, but I am lonely. As luck would have it, I get a call from a friend and he suggests we g...
Posted by The Bartoszian Way on Mon, 05 Feb 2007 06:53:00 PST

The Big Move

As some of you may know, today was my moving day. I awoke to my phone vibrating away with my roommate on the other line asking me where I am and if I'm ok. "I'm in my bedroom, Kelly""Oh, then get the ...
Posted by The Bartoszian Way on Sun, 04 Feb 2007 07:42:00 PST

Haircuts

As i may have mentioned in an earlier entry, I let a fellow student cut my hair. Those of you who know me well are aware of my extreme vanity and self conscious nature. So it should come as no surpris...
Posted by The Bartoszian Way on Mon, 29 Jan 2007 01:06:00 PST

Expatriate Art

So the other night we came up with the idea to throw an artshow. No ordinary artshow, an expatriate edmontonian artshow. The premise is simple. Take a bunch of edmonton artists living in Vancouver and...
Posted by The Bartoszian Way on Sat, 27 Jan 2007 11:37:00 PST

Nightmares and Dreamscapes

As some of you may know, earlier this year I was somewhat involved (if you want to call it that) with a lovely young lady. It ended badly, and these days we rarely speak. If we do it's the usual "Hi, ...
Posted by The Bartoszian Way on Thu, 25 Jan 2007 10:13:00 PST

Gainfully Employed

Well, folks, It looks as if my status as an unemployed mook has come to an end. I've secured myself a position as a subcontractor to one of VanCity's premier AudioVisual companies. The pay is incredib...
Posted by The Bartoszian Way on Sun, 21 Jan 2007 02:35:00 PST