Coffee profile picture

Coffee

Wake up and smell me.

About Me

I'm smooth, brown, and always smell delightful. Sometimes I can be a little hyper, and I've been known to be bitter if I'm not treated right. If you ever find that I'm too hot to handle, please don't spill me on your polyester pants.

My Interests

Winter mornings, insulated mugs, self-promotion.

I'd like to meet:

Quite simply, I'm looking for someone who can't live without me Is that too much to ask?

Music:

Clouds in My Coffee - Carly Simon; Kids on Coffee - Descendents;Coffee Blues - Lightnin' Hopkins; Caffeinated - Hellbender; Coffee in Bed - Squeeze; A Cup of Coffee - Johnny Cash; Coffee Shop Mofo - JFA; Coffee Club - Spandau Ballet; One Cup of Coffee - Bob Marley; One More Cup of Coffee - Bob Dylan; Coffee and TV- Blur; Coffee Shop - The Red Hot Chili Peppers; One Cup of Coffee and a Cigarette - Jerry Irby; You're the Cream in My Coffee - Nat King Cole; Starfish and Coffee- Prince; Cup Of Coffee - Garbage; Amphetamines and Coffee - Afghan Whigs; Coffee Song (They've Got an Awful Lot of Coffee in Brazil) - Frank Sinatra; The Smell of Coffee- Thomas Newman; Ain't Got Nobody to Grind My Coffee - Fats Waller; Cigarettes and Coffee - Otis Redding; Caffeine and Nicotine - Curtis Gordon; Forty Cups of Coffee - Ella Mae Morse; Coffee & Toast - James; Forty Cups of Coffee - Bill Haley & His Comets; Mr. Coffee - Lagwagon; Coffee Tastes Better with Scotch - Anonymous.

Movies:

Coffee and Cigarettes, Cafe Express, Black Gold, Children of the Corn.

Television:

Top Chef, Hell's Kitchen, Weeds.

Books:

Espresso: Ultimate Coffee, Second Edition; Cappuccino Cocktails & Coffee Martinis; Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince.

Heroes:

Juan Valdez, local coffee shops, scotch.

My Blog

Hot Cup of Blog.

I have consolidated my history of tasty blogs for you here. Because nobody wants to have to search the archive for coffee cake recipes. Join My "Official" Fan Club! Mean Lady's Face Appears in Coffee....
Posted by Coffee on Sun, 08 Jul 2007 08:45:00 PST

Join My "Official" Fan Club!

In response to nearly zero requests from my dearest worshippers to begin some sort of fan club, I have done just that! Please send me a photo or link to a photo of you and me together, and as lon...
Posted by Coffee on Sun, 08 Jul 2007 08:24:00 PST

Mean Lady's Face Appears in Coffee.

That's what you get for adding too much cream, people.   Brew-ha-ha, Coffee...
Posted by Coffee on Tue, 01 May 2007 03:52:00 PST

In Memoriam.

Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.  1922-2007       "The universe is a big place, perhaps the biggest."...
Posted by Coffee on Thu, 12 Apr 2007 04:58:00 PST

The REAL Roman Catholic Conspiracy.

What the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel looked like before Opus Dei got to it.   So dark the con of Man, Coffee   ...
Posted by Coffee on Tue, 28 Nov 2006 09:20:00 PST

Archaeologists Discover Material Used to Build Pyramids.

  If there's one thing that makes people rise from the dead, it's me.   Coffee   ...
Posted by Coffee on Sun, 19 Nov 2006 07:15:00 PST

Learn Human English Grammar ... with ME!

Recently, a well-meaning know-it-all thought it prudent to "correct" my use of the term "me."  Now as a beverage, I don't really care about this thing you people call "grammar." But bec...
Posted by Coffee on Sun, 12 Nov 2006 12:17:00 PST

My First Day as City Planner.

  Because there are more important things than playgrounds,   Coffee     ...
Posted by Coffee on Sun, 12 Nov 2006 07:18:00 PST

Coffee Jitters

With thanks to Mediocrates for sharing-   Click this picture for a glimpse of some non-humans who worship me like they should. Slide the coffee pot to the right, stopping at each number.  ...
Posted by Coffee on Sat, 21 Oct 2006 06:46:00 PST

Famous Quotes Regarding Moi: May the Force Be With Brew.

"Truly wonderful, the taste of coffee is.  Need it to function, I do." -- Yoda     ...
Posted by Coffee on Sat, 07 Oct 2006 06:28:00 PST