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The Awesomeness

The Wednesday Addams Of Alternative Comedy", AKA "The Awesomeness"

About Me

Raven Bast, Esquire Comedienne/Actress/Survivor (aka "The Wednesday Addams Of Alternative Comedy")
THE AWESOMENESS!
Raven was born in a shetzel in Transylvania. As a child, she was often confused for Wednesday Adams for no apparent reason other then that she looked like Wednesday Adams. Her gypsy family panhandled their way to the US, with nothing but a couch and twenty-seven dollars in change they didnt realize was in the couch.
Raven's comedy career began at the age of eleven. During a game of dodge ball, Raven chucked one at Jimmy, the one armed boy, and screamed 'catch'!"
Raven was suspended 367 times from Middleman Middle School, where she graduated with honors.
While Raven was an undergraduate student, she continued her quest to piss off her parents by getting tattoos, dying her hair green, and twice getting married to an inmate named Bubba Jenkovitz.
After an Internet divorce, Raven took up music and mastered the Radio Shack 1100 MD keyboard. She wrote her first underground hit entitled, "Boston Market Meatloaf Is Bad Ass." Raven comments, "I was really moved one night while eating Boston Market Meatloaf along with three sides: mac and cheese, mashed potatoes, and cornbread!
Raven had a melt down when she decided to please her parents by going to law school, where she acquired useless knowledge, and discovered that all the Supreme Court Justices dont wear any clothes under their robes. So, she graduated early and left the law behind her, forgetting her purse.
On Hallows Eve, 2003, Raven put on her Supergirl outfit and flew to Los Angeles. After working for several music labels, talent agencies, production companies, Raven decided to do stand-up full-time.
Raven has performed stand up at major comedy clubs such as The Improv (Hollywood), The Comedy Store (Hollywood), The Friar's Club (Beverly Hills), Zanies (Chicago), Second City (Chicago), and Chuck E. Cheese Dinner Theatre for parents of mentally challenged albinos. She produced her own show in January 2006 at The Pasadena Ice House Comedy Club entitled Terminally Funny. Recently, she featured for Drew Carey and Sarah Silverman at The Hollywood Improv.
Currently, Raven is putting the finishing touches on a one-woman show called Hell: The Musical. It will be making its Los Angeles premiere at Actors Art Theatre sometime soon, hopefully before she dies, but not necessarily. It has already been offered the best slot at the prestigious Edinburgh Fringe Festival. And, she is featured on pages 158-159 of a book called "Stop The Show" available on Amazon and major bookstores nationwide.
You can see her hour long interview and jokes cut down to probably nothing in the new film about Tommy Chong, AKA Tommy Chong. It won the Grand Prize Audience Award at the 2005 Toronto International Film Festival. And, don't forget Stan Lee's upcoming"NBA Defenders."
Finally, you can catch Raven's act at all the hottest hospices in LA!Beware: it is impossible to overdose on The Awesomeness!(Copyright, 2005)

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My Interests

Powerlifting (was member of the US Powerlifting Federation), touching my inner cochlea, Jinenkan ninjitsu, yoga, metaphysical and occult literature, DA BEARS, eating brats battered in beer, constitutional law, marijuana, and pretending I'm crazy.

I'd like to meet:

Other Wiccan comical lawyers. Oh, yeah, and Jesus Christ's brother Craig. And, don't forget, Scott Baio. But, I'm not talking about the present day greasy haired Baio. I'm referring to the "Whoa, Whoa, Whoa!" Joanie loves Chachie Baio. Oh, and Tony Danza. Mike Ditka. th

Music:

Barry White, cheesie 80s hair metal, gothic industrial, Marilyn Manson, Bowie, old school Metallica, Megadeath, ACDC, Journey, Clinic, The Ramones, Motown, Snoop

Movies:

Cheech and Chong, horror comedies, David Lynch films, and any porn that actually attempts to tell a story

Television:

Court TV, South Park, Chicken Robot, DexterClose Window

Books:

Brett Easton Ellis, The Joy Of Cooking

BUY "STOP THE SHOW" BY AWARD WINNING WRITER BRAD SCHREIBER. I AM ON PAGES 158-159!! AVAILABLE AT AMAZON AND MAJOR BOOKSTORES NATIONWIDE!!

Heroes:

Jake Shapiro for putting up with me when I am sick, my parents, anyone who has experienced a terminal illness and survived, our troops, William Shatner, Chico Debarge

My Blog

AA

I think all of my myspace friends should join AA > Awesomeness Anonymous!It's for people who can't get enough of the Awesomeness! Oh, wait... That never happens.I had cancer again, but I'm feeling fi...
Posted by The Awesomeness on Mon, 28 Jan 2008 08:56:00 PST

Is it possible to overdose on The Awesomeness?

Scientists have recently discovered it is medically impossible to overdose on "The Awesomeness."
Posted by The Awesomeness on Sat, 14 Jul 2007 01:29:00 PST

Stop Making Rude Comments About My Eyes!

Since joining myspace.com, my eyes want to express the outrage and shame brought upon them by you scandalous pic commentors. These eyes have been through a lot. Boring ass law school books like Illi...
Posted by The Awesomeness on Thu, 05 Jul 2007 07:35:00 PST

I'm cancer-free biyatches!

But still want to sleep with Brad Pitt. Call Make A Wish now! Don't delay! Operators are standing by. I can fake it...I need to contract a new disease like scabies or syphillis, so I can keep writ...
Posted by The Awesomeness on Sun, 05 Nov 2006 02:13:00 PST

You ever notice that everyone on my space is caucasion?

Just an observation. Now, talk "amongst" yourselves!
Posted by The Awesomeness on Thu, 20 Apr 2006 09:33:00 PST

My stupid ass day gig...

MY STUPID ASS DAY GIGBy Raven BastHave you noticed there are a lot of TV shows set in crazy offices nowadays? Well, I was watching one of them the other nightI think it was the one with that 40-year-o...
Posted by The Awesomeness on Thu, 20 Apr 2006 09:30:00 PST

Just because I added you to my friends list,

doesn't mean I want to rest my chin on your ball sac.
Posted by The Awesomeness on Sat, 25 Mar 2006 12:50:00 PST

The Awesomeness in MK Magazine

Go to www.mk-magazine.com to see The Awesomeness half naked and proud of it. My pics should be posted in about 4 hours. Ya know, I never dress like a whore on stage because I want my comedy to be tak...
Posted by The Awesomeness on Mon, 02 Apr 2007 07:42:00 PST