Cory (MoThEr F****r Of ThE yEaR!) profile picture

Cory (MoThEr F****r Of ThE yEaR!)

"There is no escape, there is no master plan, just blow the world to hell, this is where we stand"

About Me

im straightforward, that gets me in trouble but it's better than holding myself back from everyone. I'm really easy going, I dont like to cause trouble or get involved with drama. i like to have as much fun as humanly possible.i have an esoteric sense of humor..i love music, it turns me on!i love life, i love my friends, i love my family! I like body art and have a few holes and some ink.........Here comes the cheap plugs........i sing in a hard rock band called number one common and you can listen to them at www.myspace.com/numberonecommon or www.numberonecommon.com and i have a hip-hop project i am working on with some of my kick ass rapper friends called StereoWhores. music will be up soon at www.myspace.com/stereowhores I also am a contributing writer for www.bigmusicgeek.com check out my column "Welcome to Planet Mother Fucker!" (what else would i call it?)It's a humor column with no standard format... I rant, I rave, I discuss everything from music related and other media topics, to random occurences in my life, to whatever is on my mind at the moment or whatever i think will get a laugh...it's random and well, it's a good depiction of my sense of humor!

My Interests

rock n' roll. horror movies. pulp fiction novels. sarcasm. writing. reading. crime scene photos. working out. being nice. concerts. meeting new people. bearstranauts. cartoons. writing songs that no one hears. screaming at crotches. toxic waste. blood and guts. getting lost at a place i cant name becuase then you might find me. sundays. being scratched.hearing new music. rapping. discussing the zombie apocalypse that i hope to one day see end the world. good conversation, no matter what the topic. watching a movie at the end of the night. for some reason i also like mowing the lawn

I'd like to meet:

anyone who can hold a good conversation. musicians. poets. white-trash-devil girls. artists. party people. people who can laugh at things you shouldnt laugh at. writers. wallflowers. waitresses. zombies, misfits, lovers, vandals, stoners, skaters, punk rockers, nurses, dreamers, geeks, visionaries, models, headbangers, body modificators, hip hoppers, wierdos, christian school girls, club kids, pranksters, anyone with something to say!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Music:

I like lots and lots of music. Rather than make a huge list just check out my damn playlist in the jukebox, also im just gonna put a different video here every once in a while. watch or die! CURRENT VIDEO: AUSTRIAN DEATH MACHINE - "GET TO THE CHOPPER"

Movies:

lots of horror movies....American Pyscho. Texas Chainsaw Massacre. The Exorcist. Carrie. The Shining. Dawn of the Dead. Clockwork Orange. Godfather. Full Metal Jacket. Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels. Silence of the Lambs. Natural Born Killers. Existenz. Hostel. House of a Thousand Corpses. pi. Seven. Donnie Darko. The Devils Rejects. Clerks. Borat. Tenacios D in the Pick Of Destiny.Idiocracy. Talladaga Nights. Mallrats. Run Ronnie, Run. Resevoir Dogs.Kill Bill 1-2. X-men 1-3. Terror Firmer. Doomsday. The Road Warrior. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Control. Children of Men. Welcome to the Dollhouse. This is Spinal Tap. Team America: World Police, Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street, True Romance, Hard Candy. lots of others. i like movies.

Television:

Aqua Teen Hunger Force, The Twilight Zone, Wonder Showzen, The Sarah Silverman Program, Metalocalypse, Da Ali G Show, Southpark, Kids in the Hall, Family Guy, Mr. Show, Tales from the Crypt, The Tom Green Show, Drawn Together, Arrested Development, Upright Citizens Brigade, Mr. Show, Greg the Bunny, American Dad, Beavis and Butthead, Ren and Stimpy, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Saul of the Molemen, Action, The Office, Gerhard Reinke's Wanderlust, Kenny Vs. Spenny, American Dad, Code Monkeys, Curb Your Enthusiasm , Trigger Happy TV, Seinfeld, The Tick, Trailer Park Boys, 30 Rock, other than that i enjoy random educational programs, but hey i'll be honest if i am watching T.V., it's usually for entertainment purposes or to unwind before bed. Whatever.

Books:

James Redfield's "Celestine Prophecy," Howard Stern's "Private Parts," and "Miss America," the dictionary, Stephen King's "Everythings Eventual" (especiall the title story and the gotham cafe) George Carlin's "When will jesus bring the porkchops?," (R.I.P George!) Ed McBains "from the gutter to the grave" The Bentley Little Collection. Seymour Shubins "witness to myself," anthony burgess' "a clockwork orange," "fade to blonde" by max phillips, "the girl with the long green heart" by lawrence something or something lawrence (i forgot), "say it with bullets" by Richard Powell, "lemons never lie" by Richard Stark, "the confession" by domenic stansbury, stephen kings "nightmares and dreamscapes," "i hope they serve beer in hell" by tucker max, "straight cut" by madison smart bell, "grave descend" by john lange, "the peddler" by a really good writer whos name i cant remember, "The last Quarry" by Max Allan Collins (probably my favorite ever!), "The Cell" by Stephen King, "A Portrait of a Killer" by Patricia Cornwell (which i have a few chapters left, but it's good!), "more letters from a nut" by ted l. nancy (i keep forgetting to look for the first one), "love and death" by max wallace and ian halperin (if you are a Cobain fan i highly suggest this book, it's amazing!), "the lucifer principle" by howard bloom (i'm not gonna lie this is a hard read for me, i'm working on parts here and there), book of lists" and "everything you know is wrong" by russ rick, "stories from a moron" by ed broth (highly possible that this man is ted l. nancy),

Heroes:

my parents. my friends. ol' dirty bastard.

My Blog

Happy Halloweener!

Remember to check your candy for razorblades and also to see if it really is candy and not poop! Also I better not see anyone "dressed" as Sarah Palin! Glassess and a pant suit are not a costume! ...
Posted by Cory (MoThEr F****r Of ThE yEaR!) on Sat, 01 Nov 2008 04:19:00 PST

It’s the great pumpkin Barlie Chrown!

Sometimes, I like to enjoy a pumpkin flavored product. These items include but are not limited too: Pies, Milk Shakes, Jelly Beans, Muffins, Cakes, Tooth Paste, Gum and Soda. One time I used a pumpkin...
Posted by Cory (MoThEr F****r Of ThE yEaR!) on Thu, 02 Oct 2008 04:55:00 PST

...And the general public feeds me material again....

I was at Barnes and Nobles today browsing through the discount book section hoping to find something that could turn into future reading material, when i heard someone blow a massive fart. I'm talking...
Posted by Cory (MoThEr F****r Of ThE yEaR!) on Tue, 16 Sep 2008 08:29:00 PST

things i forgot about that other people reminded me of, part one

The year must have been about 2003, because it was around the time i was possibly stupider than I am now (this subject had been part of long debates, but that is a different blog for a diffe...
Posted by Cory (MoThEr F****r Of ThE yEaR!) on Wed, 10 Sep 2008 08:25:00 PST

Telephone Hate. Volume One

Often when I am enjoying the comfort of  the luxurious bathrooms in the building I work in, I hear people talking on their cellular telephones in the bathroom. Every time i think the sa...
Posted by Cory (MoThEr F****r Of ThE yEaR!) on Wed, 10 Sep 2008 08:10:00 PST

JORDANS SURPRISE - PAINTING ADVENTURE

This may be my last will and testament, for the man you know and have come to love may not be among the living by the time you read this. I am happy to inform you that i will be leaving this world wit...
Posted by Cory (MoThEr F****r Of ThE yEaR!) on Tue, 26 Aug 2008 09:19:00 PST

melts in your mouth.....not in the litter box

I just ate Catfish for the first time in my (insert carefully chosen adjective here) life! It was easily one of the top 5 things i have ever put in my mouth, chewed and swallowed! It was han...
Posted by Cory (MoThEr F****r Of ThE yEaR!) on Wed, 20 Aug 2008 05:46:00 PST

a long time ago when i first realized i was a lesbian.......

I have a bit of a dilemma. When i finally find out how to "Wang Chung," I am worried that i won't be abel to find a reasonable location around here to perform this act, whatever it is. I hate to ...
Posted by Cory (MoThEr F****r Of ThE yEaR!) on Mon, 18 Aug 2008 04:41:00 PST

the perfect hybrid...........

New invention: "Tamponbourine" Who knew that menstruating could be so magical and musical?...
Posted by Cory (MoThEr F****r Of ThE yEaR!) on Sun, 17 Aug 2008 03:53:00 PST

apology followed by amusing anecdote

I feel like i have been holding out on you guys recently. I havent "blogged" very much lately and it's not for lack of interesting events, it's just for lack of stories that i could get away with putt...
Posted by Cory (MoThEr F****r Of ThE yEaR!) on Wed, 13 Aug 2008 08:01:00 PST