MARK KEANE profile picture

MARK KEANE

I am here for Networking

About Me

My only goal in life was to be a member of the Hells Angels. After years of following them around and holding their drinks i realised that my dreams would never come true. I was however accepted to the Guardian Angels despite my slovenly appearance and scorching case of acne, Where i rocked a smart red beret. Until one dreaded rainy evening that i dont want to talk about. I can still hear that elderly woman's screams. But i digress. One good thing came out of that night i met Don hill a.k.a. Bruce Dern's stunt double. Where i learned to stand in one spot and do nothing all night long. My perchant for wearing grey capezios and ill fitting white tuxedos catapolted me to the much regailed position of Cat Club doorman where my pay went from $50 to a wopping $75. I dragged this fuckin' loser job out for 10 years!!! Seriously, TEN FUCKING YEARS!!! until i showed up for work and there was a padlock on the door. All i had to my name was 10 ugly tuxedos, a raging cocaine problem and several twitches. For some reason these were all respected qualities at The Palladium where i was immediatley hired as a baracade. Im still there to this day where they keep telling me its a dorm. BUT... I'm not buying that bullshit. They're just trying to cut my days.

My Interests

Rainy Sundays, kittens, rainbows, unicorns, the laughter of children, nun exploitation movies, snuff films (you know, the ones from the philippines), puppy burning, smoking ice, and quiet evenings.

I'd like to meet:

Peter Gatien, Astro Earl, The Hamburgler, anyone from the I.R.A., a good glass of scotch, the guy who plays the killer in wolf creek, Allessandra Gatien or whatever her last name is (she still owes me half a shift from 96), The layed back part of Jamaica that is really cool and fun to go to without being hassled that i keep hearing about, The Wicker Man, Bucket Head, That chic i dated from The Bronx who looked just like Christie Turlington, and Angelina Jolie's gynecologist.

Music:



This profile was edited with Thomas' Myspace Editor V3.2b
and Satan.

Movies:

DIE BITCH DIE (Mexico 1983), I SPIT ON YOUR GRAVE, 2 NUNS ARE BETTER THAN ONE, THE LITTLE MATCH GIRL AND HER 2 PUPPIES, BLOOD OF SATAN'S CLAW, AND SHREK 2.

Books:

Pantera I'm Broken .. .. Music Video Codes By Music Jesus.com

Heroes:

A sober Chris V., Jack's portable heart monitor, Brad Pitt's ever changing hair styles, Chicken cutlet parm., Palladium door staff 1985-1997, Di Canio, Ray M's balls of steel, Sean Brophy's hair system, Mumbles, Lips, Ronny the Bum, David Berkowitz, His Dog, Marcus V.(Who???), Veal cutlet parm., Edie Amine, Baby Doc, The Tom Buckley Mask (you know the one), The guy with the long hair who used to work the clicker at Palladium, Gerry Adams (I.R.A. not Limelight), Jerry Adams (Limelight not I.R.A.), The I.R.A. Boys indescriminantly firing at anything British (women, children, dogs, whatever), Hank Stohats, Sausage and peppers, Dino (Palladium not Flintstones), The honorable Elijah Mohamed, Michael Colins, Padraege Pierce, Bobby Sands, Mariah Carey, Massive props to D.J. Reality for the much ballyhooed death head, Moshzilla, Potatoe and Egg, People who pretended to work at Limelight between 1991-1994, Father Chris and his relentless problem with you know what, Jeffrey Jah's Hair, Leaded pool cues, Chicken Milanese, anyone who believes Duane's bullshit, The guy on 39th street who breaks my balls nightly about non existent noise problems, The cute boy from The O.C., The guy who almost molested Arnold on the hide your hiney episode of Different Strokes, Marc Berkley, Eggplant parm., My new schedule at Speed, Joe the police man from the Whats Goin Down? episode of That's My Momma, Dice, and of course America's Oldest Living Teenager... Tom Buckley aka The Buck, Mr. Buckley, and Tommy Buck I dont give FUCK!

My Blog

To all of my Dear Friends...

Trapped in purgatoryA lifeless object, aliveAwaiting reprisalDeath will be their acquisitionThe sky is turning redReturn to power draws nearFall into me, the sky's crimson tearsAbolish the rules made ...
Posted by MARK KEANE on Tue, 21 Feb 2006 12:30:00 PST

POETRY

(Me have problem) Me likey Hennessy, Me likey Hennessy alot Me drunk on Hennessy right now Me likey Hennessy, seriously Me likey Hennessy!!! Me likey Hennessy? Yes, Me likey Hennessy. Me likey 1,2,3,6...
Posted by MARK KEANE on Tue, 14 Feb 2006 11:33:00 PST

My FUCKIN' space!

150 profiles views in 1 week and 3 people posted comments. WHAT THE FUCK??? Who the fuck is Marcus V.??? Is this some kind of hybrid mix of Mark Keane and Chris V.? Yet he pretends not to know us. Me ...
Posted by MARK KEANE on Tue, 14 Feb 2006 11:19:00 PST

This Evening...

This evening... Once again, the lord Satan has tricked me. Promises of unlimited Hennessey consumption with little or no recourse proved to be deceit. Damn Him!
Posted by MARK KEANE on Thu, 02 Feb 2006 12:07:00 PST