EVIL Whitebeard - ProfilesArchive

About Me

I edited my profile with Thomasâ€™ Flargin' Myspace Editor V3.6 !
Basically, I know how to breakdance. That's probably the most important thing to write here. Sometimes I get angry and I'll pound on the keys like this: LKJSDFHP;ASEHAlkq-w8346jhg0yu 4-29yq34hdlt;%..@I%$6043q6w5i pajt'lgjsp;kjdfslkjHOLF;L. Then I have to listen to some Michael Bolton cds and that usually calms my yaaaargin' nerves.Things I dislike: BACKSTABBERS AND DRAMA. That was reeeeal cool when that frickin' idiot stabbed me in the back during that one raid. I had to get like a trillion stitches. Flargin' IdIoTs!!!! I hate drama so much that I watch Lifetime just so I get angry before I go on a raid. Don't listen to what anyone tells you, yarrr...I WASN'T EATING OUT OF THE ICE CREAM CARTON AND SOBBING LIKE A CHILD WHILE WATCHING A MADE-FOR-TV MOVIE ABOUT CELINE DION'S TOUGH UPBRINGING. Lies. All lies. And anyone who saw me watching that show has since accidentally walked the plank. Very tragic.
Name: Whitebeard The Pirate
Birthdate: Arrggg.
The Shoes You Wore Today: Peg leg and one black shoe.
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: Make a billion dollars. Then give one dollar to a billion people.
Your Most Overused Phrase On instant messenger: LOL or OMG. it's close
Thoughts First Waking Up: Arrggg...give me my rum
Your Best Physical Feature: beard
Your Most Missed Memory: pillaging
Do you Smoke: YES
Do you Drink: YES (lol kElLy, JiM, aNd SaRa xoxoxoxoxo GoOd TiMeS!!!!)
Do you Swear: Like a sailor.
Do you Shower Daily: I bathe in the sea
In the past 2 minutes have you Drank Alcohol: Yes
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: Yes
In the past month have you stolen any treasure: Arrggg.
In the past month have you made someone walk the plank: Of course.
Ever shoplifted: lol
Ever not been drunk: No
I've killed how many men on the high seas: Probably, like, 100 million people. No. No. That's ridiculous. Probably, like, 100 billion.
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My Interests

Oh. That's kind of weird. We have to pick one? Um. Maybe Patton. And then maybe General Norman Schwarzkopf in second place.

I'd like to meet:

R.L. Stevenson, Michael Bolton, the 1993 Philadelphia Phillies

Music:

Michael Bolton

Movies:

I cry every time I watch The Notebook. BUT IF YA TELL ANYONE, I'LL RUN YA THROUGH!!! ARRRRRG!!!

Television:

OMG, too many to name! But absolute favorites: The Facts Of Life, Gilmore Girls

Books:

Treasure Island

Heroes:

Richard Simmons, Yanni, Big League Chew

My Blog

Another special election report: HOT BUTTON ISSUES!

Ahoy thar, mateys. I’ve prepared some more thoughts concerning this year’s presidential election. Read up so you know who to vote for in November. Savvy?Gay marriage: Most marriages are fl...
Posted by EVIL Whitebeard on Thu, 20 Mar 2008 07:20:00 PST

Election 2008: Whitebeard’s Take

Hillary Clinton: She accused Obama of stealing words from some other guy's speeches. For example, Obama said "Good morning." Ronald Reagan also uttered these words on numerous occasions, so she has a ...
Posted by EVIL Whitebeard on Mon, 03 Mar 2008 02:55:00 PST

UFO Spotted in Texas?

Mateys,the other day, residents of a Texas town reportedly saw an unidentified flying object soar overhead. However, I was just watching CNN and apparently the vehicle has since been identified: it wa...
Posted by EVIL Whitebeard on Wed, 16 Jan 2008 07:46:00 PST

Thoughts on the Iowa Caucuses and the UK Vomiting Bug

Ahoy thar, mateys. Evil Whitebeard is gracious enough to let me release a message at the start of the year. First of all, many frickin' people are askin' me thoughts on the flargin' caucuses in Iowa. ...
Posted by EVIL Whitebeard on Fri, 04 Jan 2008 08:29:00 PST

Santa: Should his sleigh slow down?

Mateys,If you've been following the news, you'd know that the self-proclaimed experts are debating whether or not Santa Claus should shed some pounds; apparently, his weight is a poor model for childr...
Posted by EVIL Whitebeard on Tue, 11 Dec 2007 03:22:00 PST

Q & A with Evil Whitebeard

Q: Evil Whitebeard, why did you take over Whitebeard's ship??? - Amanda W.A: Because I don't believe in Christmas.
Posted by EVIL Whitebeard on Mon, 03 Dec 2007 10:03:00 PST

EVIL Whitebeard commandeers Whitebeards MySpace

Greetings, subordinates.As you can clearly see, my brain and beard are MASSIVE. 789 X 542 = 427,638. I did that without a calculator. Just so you know what you're up against. So long, losers.Your enem...
Posted by EVIL Whitebeard on Mon, 03 Dec 2007 04:31:00 PST

Updates: Whitebeard lives, the weekly, and a contest ($)!

Titanic updates, mateys.1. Whitebeard is alive and well. We have reliable word.2. Whitebeard Weekly to be posted soon (seriously this time).3. A contest is in the works. Cash/prizes for the winner. Pl...
Posted by EVIL Whitebeard on Tue, 23 Oct 2007 12:23:00 PST

I know, we havent updated this thing for a long time

Whitebeard is not dead as some have insisted. He's simply enjoying the summer. A new weekly will be posted in the near future (I'll write 'near future' because it's vague. No real deadline = weekly wi...
Posted by EVIL Whitebeard on Fri, 17 Aug 2007 04:31:00 PST

Who are you voting for in '08?

Probably not these people: ...
Posted by EVIL Whitebeard on Sat, 28 Jul 2007 02:36:00 PST