COWMAN

Cowman was working at a farm experimenting with genetically modified crops and their effect on cows and their milk. One day while performing some menial duties, he fell into a vat of radioactive milk. He was pulled out and declared dead. But he was not dead, he awoke and discovered he had special powers, like being able to create a fart that can kill, make annoying noises and consume a lot of grass... ............................................................ .............................................. Here's what 'the Lab' has to say'one man, one bass guitar, one drum machine backing track, a bunch of distortion pedals, cowman makes music that sounds like nirvana around incesticide and looks like the offspring of those two guys from lightning bolt. totally brilliant.' ------------------------------------------------------------ ------------------------------ Talena from 'The Mag' said, 'It's hard to expect much from title's like '(It's so fun) Kiddie Rape', but they could definitely pass as a soundtrack to a gritty, yet poor horror movie. No matter how well he uses the technology it's no substitute for real instruments, and, unfortunately, it can get painfully monotonous.'------------------------------------------------ --------------------------- ------------------------------------------------------------ ------------------------------ Alfonso from 'Artrocker' said, 'it says here that COWMAN was a milk man who fell into a vat of genetically modified milk, and mutated into a human cow that plays techno music. Hmmm. Mamma says I should not believe this press release! No matter how deformed you are though, there is no excuse for music that sounds as appealing as an orange pair of trousers! RATING: ROYALE WITH CHEESE'----------------------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ------------------------------------------------------------ ------------------------------- Kid Pensioner from Venue says, 'Cowman spends a huge amount of time connecting up his vast array of foot pedals, changes into a scene-of-crime white boiler suit and goggles, and then begins his one-man set of industrial noise. Quite why he needs all this gear is mystifying, as it all sounds the same. Everything is distorted: the jackhammer drum machine, the bass guitar he pummels throughout, and the vocals, like an Early Learning Centre Foetus or Nine Inch Nails without any dynamics. We are clearly witnessing some form of catharsis as he's grinning throughout, like a beanpole Calvin Harris in a slaughterhouse. "This is a bonus track," he assures, before beginning a retread of the last song. Not for us it isn't.'--------------------------------------------------- ------------------------------------------------------------ ------------------------------