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::who i am::
who am i?
a while ago, someone asked me to describe who i am.... who i really am. we were talking about how it's the end of our college careers, our expectations.... where we are in life compared to where we want to be..... and it made me think-- who exactly am i? really?
i am a woman, to start with. a twenty-two year old human female, and everything that word (female) encompasses: i am soft, curvacious, emotional, driven, silly/serious, and scented.
i am a Christian- not perfect by ANY means, just forgiven. a jesus freak for sure- unashamed of and crazy about my Savior.
i love chocolate-flavored and vanilla-scented things.
i love cats.
i love to laugh and hate to cry, although i end up doing both quite a bit.
i love to sleep!
i have pet names for EVERYONE. if you're not a "babe", "honey" "sweetheart", "darling", "angel", "love", "baby", "chickie"/"girlie" or "dude"/"man"..... then whoever you've been talking to isn't cindy; she's an imposter and needs to be reported right away.
i love if whoever i'm dating has pet names for me :)
right now, i am:
in love. insecure. thirsty. tired. proud. missing quite a few people. confident. getting back on my feet financially. unsure.
what i expect from my friends:
reliability. trust. honesty. compassion and understanding.
what i expect from my relationships:
COMMUNICATION! affection. openness. motivation.
turn ons/what attracts me to people:
ability to laugh AND cry with me. Christ-centeredness. truth. affection. "little things."
turn offs/what pushes me away from people:
lying-- telling me the truth but not the whole truth is just as bad as lying to my face. distance.... emotionally, physically, romantically. BAD BREATH. cruelty. being ignored.
i am me. i'm "unwritten", "undefined" and "just beginning." sometimes, i'm irrational. sometimes, i crack. sometimes, i feel helpless.
i HATE feeling helpless.
i also hate my pride, my insecurities, my tendency to over-analyze things and take things too literally. i hate when i get left behind; abandonment is my 'issue' right now. i hate that i'm so fragile about some things and the confidence i have in other areas in my life doesn't cross over to my insecurities.
i love that i can usually empathize with people, that i'm very understanding. i am very accepting. i'm not afraid of the truth and will take it even if it hurts. i love that i'm comfortable enough with myself physically to where i'm not constantly judging how i'm going to feel based on how other people look. i don't compare myself to anyone.
i am.....well, i'm me.
who exactly is that?
i'm still figuring that out.
i have:
~an awesome roomie/best friend- mandolin!
~better friends than i ever could have asked for
~a fantastic cat named paintball who i love to distraction
i love:
~blogging ;D
~Texas State football
~Freecell, chocolate, lipgloss, and music
My junior year of college, I attended a retreat called Bobcat Awakening and it literally changed how I look at and live my life. I am a C.... :) Recently I came back as a member of the BA Staffing Family and it was an incredible, irreplaceable experience. I'm hoping I can get more people to come because it really is awesome... if you live in the san antonio/san marcos/austin area, you should come to BA!!
Anything else you want to know about me? Just ask!
A rose by any other...
Cinders, Cindaboo, Butterfly, Beautiful, Nilla Bean, Goofball, and "Hey You" always works just fine.
Gag me...
Satan (he's such an annoying liar) | money/lack therof ;-) | narrow minded people | clowns | falling | circus music | the dark | the unknown | dogs | eggplant | alarm clocks | the color pink | country music
Quote me...
"You can't tell your heart what to feel." --ME
"Don't regret your mistakes, learn from them." --ME
"I would insult your intelligence, but what would be the point?" --wobbly headed bob
Nuck Fo!!
