The one who won't be taken (James)

After years of extravagent and incredible feats...I have retired from life and love itself until further notice as-needed.What I want won't come back. She/it has nearly killed me and every attempt to reclaim it...
I have wanted and needed love undelivered; it does NOT exist for me. You cannot use flawed human reasoning and stereotypical statements to suggest otherwise any longer. The presence of your actions is all that I needed, and the absence of those kinder actions without expectation is all that I have received in turn.I do not want or wish for anything. There is no longer anything to tell you ABOUT me that I can bear or tolerate to describe. There ARE many things that I cannot tell you because they ARE beyond human understanding and as such, I will not accommodate those misgiving stereotypical human desires to satiate their need for half-explanations any longer!This is me, dismissing life. YES.I used to write a lot, research a lot, program a lot, and do a lot behind the scenes. I still do, but a change of gears is in order more than ever now. I'm spiritual, but not religious. Scientific, but not mainstream. Kind and considerate, but not someone you want to mess with. Overall, I'm a nice guy. The real thing. And if you play your cards straight with me, I'll play them straight with you as well. Cheat me, and expect to be cheated...not by me, but by other things that take account for every little thing that you do even without my consent.
This is how I roll:
Be yourself. Everyone else is taken...
If you want to add me to your friends list, my last name is wasil.
I'm tired of getting spam/camwhore friend requests from fake profiles.
At my most basic moment I'm a complexity. I aspire to be the implementation of something kind and beautiful that is beyond the reach of the world as we know it to be.
I get discouraged by the things people justify doing for all the wrong reasons, or all the right ones at all the wrong ways.
I have many projects, big and small. I have a bunch of random blogs scattered about that, right now are mostly link collectors and various tools, but useful stuff nonetheless. You can visit one of them at this place.
I believe that most people are atrocious. Really, I do. Most of them refuse to contribute meaningful things, and give nothing back to the greater good of society as they were given to at any way. Swingers, liars, cheaters and bullies...they equally disgust me. I despise them for trying to break the spirits of others for their own sick gain and personal enjoyment.
My demeanor has changed, and in the wake of my anti-socialism I see that I am now more than ever blood-thirsty to smash every attempt by those people and things who harm others and defile decency in ANY form.
I don't care what it takes. I will do it. And yes this IS me. You'd better get used to it.

Oh, and here's a little link back to the past about how I feel about stuff for those who wanted to know, or read it again.
James's Myspace Music Directory...myspacelist.blogspot.com...a work yet to be completed.
freefileshare.blogspot.com ...a brief synopsis for BitTorrent, how to use it, a search box for the pirate bay, and links to the best free file and picture hosting sites around today.
For those who came here looking for the 33, my blogs and the details for that have become a bit spread out between many things. Do not worry though...I plan to organize and answer those questions. For the mean time, these words today from my friend Amber should speak to you, as you know that time, space, questions, and answers are all seperate parts of the same thing:
_______________________________________________________ May 21, 2007 3:33 PM That's what I'm talking about. I want to know what that something else is. What that something is that lacks that warm fuzzy feeling that makes every "good" deed selfish. What is it?
_______________________________________________________
The ability to notice comes first. The ability to ask questions comes second, and the ability to see comes third. The success then follows three fold each time. Endless to the extent of your mastery of it.
When you find it, you can swallow your pride. Pride contains no calories nor transfat, and is...100% natural...
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