Fuck Cancer

Cancer touches everyone. If you are not a patient, you are a survivor, a loved one, or a friend. My first encounter was my mother (1950 -1995). She drove us home from school, and then sat my sister and I down at the kitchen table to tell us. All we asked was, Are you going to die? The doctors are confident they can control it, we caught it early enough, she said. Three years later we went to hospice care for the last time and then she was gone. I was young and didnt even know what cancer was. Ive tried to blame myself but blame gets you nowhere, research, self-education, and an unyielding passion to never lose another loved one to cancer, does. 8 years after my mothers death, I started dating my fiance. We werent high school sweethearts but we did meet there and started dating about six months after I graduated. 9 months into a relationship that still felt brand new, he sat me down on the bed and said it was cancer. The word echoed in my head and I felt like someone dropped a bag of sand into the pit of my stomach. I didnt cry, I wouldnt cry, I had to be strong supportive and find a way to beat it. A few months before that night, James noticed some swelling in his ankle. We figured it was the result of some old hockey injury. He didnt have insurance so as the swelling and stiffness grew his only option was to go to the doctors office his mother worked at. Could be rheumatoid arthritis but Id get it checked out, the doctor said. As soon as I heard, I knew there had to be vitamins and nutritional therapy available. I had been working in health foods and independently studying nutrition for my own sake. 20 bottles of pills later I had an arsenal of arthritis treating vitamins including large doses of vitamin C and other antioxidants that also help prevent the spread of cancer. After sitting in Stonybrook Medical Center all day, James spoke to the doctor who bluntly stated, Well, it looks like cancer. So whats next: chemo, surgery, and then more chemo at Sloane Kettering (If this sounds familiar to anyone, I will explain further on this page what a mistake this protocol is and what your alternatives are.). The official diagnosis was Ewings Sarcoma. This type of cancer is usually found in children and young adults, it is highly malignant, and untreated the disease will spread to the lungs and other bones. At the time I was selling steak knives door to door. One night I was sitting in my neighbors house when he mentioned that he was a doctor at Stonybrook. I told him about our recent news. He said, Chop it off. What? I thought. Oh my god, amputation, that cant possibly ever happen, its too drastic. He then told me about his friend in Poland where he studied medicine. They were both medical students, his friend was diagnosed and then died within a week. I didnt tell James about that night until we were sitting with his surgeon and she gave him the option of limb salvage or amputation. We then made another of many wrong decisions. After the limb salvage which is where they perform surgery to try to remove the tumor James began to recover from surgery and then continued chemotherapy. The chemotherapy treatments were grueling. One week out of every three we would trek into the city every day and the chemo along with hydration would be administered. We would be there for 8 hours and then drive home in rush hour traffic for 3 hours. They would serve fried garbage with no nutritional value to all the other sick children. When we first went in for the treatment I couldnt believe how many sick children there were with horrible scars, bald heads, and some with amazingly complex personalities. After that first day I knew I had to help James and then find a way to help everyone else. James chemotherapy went on for about 8 months. The final diagnosis was that everything looked good and James was supposedly in remission (I now know there is no such thing). He had to continue to be tested every month. Later that year a few days before Thanksgiving he went in for his monthly scans. His ankle had been hurting and we were all a little worried. The scans came up clear so they said although we later found out that it was in the scan yet overlooked. This is another example of the lack of accountability at major cancer centers. The next month, a few days before Christmas, the doctors called and said they wanted to see us. Christmas was ruined and we knew what we would find out. However no one expected it to be as bad as it was. The cancer spread to his skull, back, legs, ribs, and hips. I should have done more research when he was first diagnosed. I shouldnt have listened to the doctors. I could have done more, and this time I was going to. It was going to be more difficult and James was in more serious trouble. It was time to uncover the lies and bullshit for example how they tell you not to take a multivitamin with chemo when what you actually should do is up every dose of everything that will strengthen you for your treatments. You have to make your healthy cells stronger and the cancer cells weaker so that the chemo has a greater effect. This is what we began to do. Diet modification and supplementation to help defeat cancer became my new topic of study. After intense high dose radiation and chemotherapy sent James into the hospital almost dead we knew something had to change. We started noticing that everything they were telling us to do was all wrong. As James started changing his diet and adding supplements his scans began to improve only it wasnt enough. By this time James had been sick for a year, healthy for a year, and now sick again for another year. As he was nearing the end of his current rounds of therapy his ankle had gotten so weak that he needed a cane and most of the time couldnt walk at all. He asked his surgeon what he could do and thats when he made the decision to amputate. If he didnt hed never walk normally, without pain again. However the doctors failed to tell us that they thought he only had a few months to a year left to his life anyway. After the surgery, James immune system was now weaker than ever and the cancer was still there. The amputation was challenging for us. He went back to chemo too soon and complications arose. Thats when I was the strongest in my life helping to care for him and watching and helping the surgeon perform a mini operation to remove dying skin from the site. At least now I know I can do anything. James continued to recover and adjust to life as an amputee which for him the strongest mother fucker on the planet isnt much different than any other life and still isnt. So now the cancer was still there and the doctors decided to try a sixth and seventh chemo. We had had enough and it was time for us to go elsewhere, where everyone who was told they only had a few months to live went and were cured. We knew there were treatments out there that you could get your hands on if you had some money, but we didnt know how simple and effective they were. After a series of coincidences which I will discuss further elsewhere, we found the place. Thanks to James extraordinary friends (who I thank on the page and will continue to thank for the rest of my life) we started the treatments. They raised over 20,000 dollars which didnt last long but it was enough to get him where he is now. James has been to hell and back again. He has been told he has cancer at 20 years old. Hes played shows hooked up to a Chemo bag. Hes been through well over 30 rounds of chemo which I guarantee no one would even wish upon their worst enemy. Hes been through a limb salvage, and amputation, an infected stump, and now walks as well as you or I. He has never lost hope, never felt apathy and has fought for his life harder than anyone you could ever meet. He personifies hope, optimism and is positively the most outgoing 23 year old on the planet.