PREDATOR BARBIE profile picture

PREDATOR BARBIE

while you were sleeping we helped ourselves

About Me

I have an intense, chronic fascination with post-colonial dictatorships. When I was but a child, I used to giggle with delight at tales of the depravity of Caligula or the corruption of the medieval papacy. But I soon realized that these fragile inbred characters paled in comparison to the fickle dispositions of central African despots left in charge of developing third world hellholes in the wake of an imperial power vacuum. Hit me up if you enjoy exchanging amusing anecdotes about the cruelty of 20th century tyrants. From Uday Hussein's fascination with Air Bud to Kim Jong Il's platform shoes to Idi Amin's soft spot for human flesh. Other favorite personas include Robert Mugabe and Teodoro Obiang Nguema Mbasogo. I would love to hear your ideas about smuggling narcotics in diplomatic luggage, good cinematic themes for public stadium-based executions, fostering burgeoning cults of personality, or emerging plans for amphibious assaults on western Africa by private mercenary armies. Always remember, the world is your ashtray. And act accordingly.

My Interests

The sacred and the profane

I'd like to meet:

mike tyson - undoubtedly the world's most under-appreciated and over-looked warrior philosopher-king.
[He] called me a rapist and a recluse. Im not a recluse.
"Lennox Lewis, I'm coming for you man. My style is impetuous. My defense is impregnable, and I'm just ferocious. I want your heart. I want to eat his children. Praise be to Allah!"
"I paid a worker at New York's zoo to re-open it just for me and Robin. When we got to the gorilla cage there was 1 big silverback gorilla there just bullying all the other gorillas. They were so powerful but their eyes were like an innocent infant. I offered the attendant $10,000 to open the cage and let smash that silverback's snotbox! He declined."
"There are nine million people who see me in the ring and hate my guts. Most of them are white. That's okay. Just spell my name right."
"My power is discombobulatingly devastating I could feel is muscle tissues collapse under my force. It's ludicrous these mortals even attempt to enter my realm."
"It's no doubt I am going to win this fight and I feel confident about winning this fight. I normally don't do interviews with women unless I fornicate with them. So you shouldn't talk anymore... Unless you want to, you know."
"All praise is to Allah, I'll fight any man, any animal, if Jesus were here I'd fight him too.
"The one thing I know, everyone respects the true person and everyone's not true with themselves. All of these people who are heroes, these guys who have been lily white and clean all their lives, if they went through what I went through, they would commit suicide. They don't have the heart that I have. I've lived places they can't defecate in."
"At times, I come across as crude or crass, that irritates you when I come across like a Neanderthal or a babbling idiot at times. But I like to be that person. I like to show you all that person because that's who you come to see."
"I'm just a dark guy from a den of iniquity. A dark shadowy figure from the bowels of iniquity. I wish I could be Mike who gets an endorsement deal. But you can't make a lie and a truth go together. This country wasn't built on moral fiber. This country was built on rape, slavery, murder, degradation and affiliation with crime."
"I'm on the Zoloft to keep from killing y'all."

My Friend Space
I have a few friends.

MASTER

The Female Jordan

Leni R

Bitches and Hoes-A

The Brazillianaire

Metrosexual Ken

Veltis

Mail Boy

Kumar

Hometown Homegirl

Gramps

Linds

Emperor Palpitations

Just Jess

Big Man Dan

Lynchmob

The Church of Jewcifer

Recife for Disaster

Partly Fighter, Mostly Lover

Mel

The Time Traveler

Teresa

Uncle Syd

Partially Paul

Animaltek

DJ Jamie Kidd

Sinister Indie Catastrophe

H-Man

Dino Fingerz Martinez

Chumbo Mundo

Stephan Bodzin

Martin H

View All of My Friends

Music:

I'll give you a hint. It goes a little something like *fooooooooooooooomp* "thwip" _schwwwwwttttttttttttt_ bwaaaaaaawr! D.Ramirez. Oliver Huntemann. Trentemoeller. Jamie Jones. Alex Under. Superchumbo. Peace Division. Midi Miliz. X-Dream. Extrawelt. Nic Fanciulli. Loco Dice. Alexkid. BSOD. Stephan Bodzin. Sebastien Leger. Gabriel Ananda. Rekorder. Krueger & Coyle. Amphasis. Mark Knight. Marc Romboy. John Dahlback. D-Nox. Chris Lake. Plasmik. Oxia. Ripperton. Robag Wruhme. ASCII Disko. Alexkid. Mark Henning. Sweet 'n Candy.

Movies:

adaptation --- amadeus --- amelie --- annie hall --- apocalypse now redux --- bad boy bubby --- barton fink --- best in show --- big kahuna --- big lebowski --- boondock saints --- the butcher, the thief, his wife and her lover --- clerks --- crimes and misdemeanours --- deliverance --- donnie darko (not editors cut) --- dr strangelove --- eternal sunshine of the spotless mind --- four rooms --- full metal jacket --- glengarry glen ross --- gummo --- happiness --- harold & kumar go to white castle --- i heart huckabees --- in the company of men --- in the mouth of madness --- irreversible --- leaving las vegas --- life is beautiful --- the lost highway --- magnolia --- memento --- pi --- princess bride --- pulp fiction --- radio days --- the reflecting skin --- requiem for a dream --- reservoir dogs --- the royal tenenbaums --- the shining --- sideways --- silence of the lambs --- slc punk --- the sting --- y tu mama tambien

Television:

late night programming on comedy central and basically anything that hbo has ever produced and nothing else

Books:

1984 -- a day in the life of ivan denisovich -- all quiet on the western front -- alphabet and the goddess -- american psycho -- bright lights big city -- candide -- catch 22 -- a clockwork orange -- crime & punishment -- demian -- fear and loathing in las vegas -- great gatsby -- the illuminatus! trilogy -- ishmael -- the jungle -- journey to the end of the night -- logic, language, and truth -- mother night -- the picture of dorian gray -- the red badge of courage -- siddhartha -- the stranger -- the wall

Heroes:

bertrand russell --- colonel "bob" denard --- bill hicks --- erostratus --- mark twain --- oscar wilde --- sir richard francis burton --- sacha baron-cohen --- socrates --- voltaire