Petty, pretty things. Irony.
When I first met you, didn't realize I can't forget you, for your surprise you introduced me, to my mind And left me wanting, you and your kind
Listening to some oldies, some newbies: Adrian Belew-Side One. Leonard Cohen-Various Positions. Leonard Cohen-I'm Your Man soundtrack. Love Spirals Downwards-Idylls. Nina Simone-Wild is the Wind. Nick Cave-The Good Son. Wes Montgomery-Boss Guitar. Chavez-Better Days Will Haunt You. The Boo Radleys-Everything's Alright Forever. Clinic. Thin Lizzy-Bad Reputation. This Mortal Coil-It'll End in Tears. Queen-Jazz. Mazzy Star-She Hangs Brightly. Massive Attack-Mezzanine. Paul McCartney & Wings-Band on the Run. Tom Waits-Alice. Neil Young-Year of the Horse. Esthero-Breath From Another. Elliot Smith-Figure 8. Spacemen 3-The Perfect Prescription.
If only some woman would sing this song about me.
Porn. I'm sorry, folks. Not about the porn. But about any hint of elitist condescension towards the Internet porn generation. I'm sort of a traditionalist, I must say. A real indie pornster. Kids these days...just don't know how good they have it. Back in my day...the things I would have to do to satisfy my hermaphrodite midget fetish. And the film quality...what the fuck up is with all this high definition super-fine "deep-sea-Jacque Cousteau" style snatch shots? Back in my day, we got appetizers and had our imaginations fill in the rest. The slight exposure of the areola, the shadows of jiggling body parts, the lustful reflection of each other's nude, sweaty, hairy body in each other's anticipating eyes...it was enough to send me to porno heaven. Seriously, people need a few pubes here and there! Do you really have to shave EVERYTHING? I mean for crying out loud. That's like going to the petting zoo to observe the miracle of the goat's shapely figure. I mean come on...it's all about the fur, and feeding it peanuts and breadcrumbs and hay and stuff. God, I miss the 70's.
What They Don't Want You to Know.In order to understand The Leftist Overthrow of America you need to realize that everything is controlled by The Nation of Islam made up of Chinese Jews with help from a buncha raggedy orphans. The conspiracy first started during my first lay in a public bathroom at The Black Cat Rock and Roll Club in Washington D.C. They have been responsible for many events throughout history, including the Reagan assassination attempt and I Can't Believe It's Not Butter.Today, members of the conspiracy are everywhere. They can be identified by coffee stains on their teeth and nicotine stains on their fingers.They want to castrate members of "Republicans Against Ben and Jerry's" and imprison resisters in Freedom, Texas using them shoes that's got wheels on 'em.In order to prepare for this, we all must nip them Commie Chinko Jews in the bud. Since the media is exclusively controlled by Hillary Clinton we should get our information from my God-fearin' gun-totin' Pa.