hawk profile picture

hawk

I am here for Friends and Networking

About Me

i'm here looking to join a gang, start a religion. i love the dark side, i just don't live there year round anymore. you can be comforted to know that i am fluent in the language, usually carrying some of the currency and not easily spooked by the locals. i'm not like that other girl you're thinking of. promise.

My Interests

fighting dogs that won't fight, fighting girls with matching jackets and sharpie marker eyebrows, laffy taffy jokes

I'd like to meet:

girls in gangs, tuff girls, ugly girls, girls with whip fighting skills, girls with air-powered beak trimmers. on the internet, no one cares that you are pretty, so hush up about it. are you frequently censored at work for being embarassingly personal, profane or inappropriate? been saving you a seat. i will not be availing myself of the top friends feature because i am not crazy.

Music:

good place arkansas

Movies:

baller blockin

Television:

tim and eric

Books:

jesus saves. his fork for pie!

Heroes:

laika, babydog, ham the chimp, kool keith

My Blog

fallout comedy 1995

i'm almost finished cooking this thought. people don't realize that there is this, like, lattice of coincidence that lays on top of everything. let me give you an example, show you what i mean...i onc...
Posted by hawk on Tue, 24 Jun 2008 08:49:00 PST

gc, rip

though i have nothing new to add, there is no way my ocd will let me let george carlin's passing pass without a touch. touch, touch, touch, not censored, all out in public, which i appreciate. on...
Posted by hawk on Mon, 23 Jun 2008 12:30:00 PST

what did you do last week, lucretia borgia?

acquired three art crimes got a 90 minute ass beating from a strong man put a few people together when it seemed right saw the beginnings of a christian family parade complete with roman centurians e...
Posted by hawk on Mon, 23 Jun 2008 07:30:00 PST

distance equals rate times time

you might not think this applies to you, but if you're already paying attention to me, as the direction of your pupils indicates, it might. today the universe threw me a bone. in the form of a pi...
Posted by hawk on Mon, 23 Jun 2008 06:56:00 PST

maximum summer, minimum irritation

the maxwell street market just might be the most refreshing response to the baseball/taste of chicago/jam band street fair summertime conundrum. you get to have all of your summer things but if t...
Posted by hawk on Mon, 23 Jun 2008 04:24:00 PST

repost in the interest of complete clarity

i need things to be a certain way. next to each other. tidy. so here's a rerun for you: this is why we're going to have to make pretty in pink - 2008: i do think that andie does end up with ...
Posted by hawk on Mon, 23 Jun 2008 04:18:00 PST

clarity on the subject of james

so in that pop2008 post, when i said "get off james spader", i should have been clearer about why i think you should do this. if i only holler, you will never hear. but i would like to say that h...
Posted by hawk on Sat, 21 Jun 2008 12:31:00 PST

rhett sample, anyone?

seriously, i need someone to help me get in touch with this gentleman. yesterday.  i have wasted a lot of time not talking to him and it is breaking my heart. so now it's your problem. he put an ...
Posted by hawk on Wed, 18 Jun 2008 10:03:00 PST

i tried to tell you

that i am awesome. and now i have broken the internet. one of the drawbacks to living in the bowery of the second city is that new wave real estate means that you have very limited choices for service...
Posted by hawk on Thu, 19 Jun 2008 11:31:00 PST

new york london paris munich

everybody wants to talk about everything but sex on the sex and the city entry so let's see what happens when i talk about top 40 in the 80s... the reagan years brought us this music that pe...
Posted by hawk on Mon, 16 Jun 2008 01:33:00 PST