Lacklustre Productions profile picture

Lacklustre Productions

Short Film On Steroids

About Me

Welcome to Lacklustre Productions, home to the seminal short film maker Andrew Farmer and drug addled, ex-children's TV presenter and impresario, Grahame Cookie. We are based in Shoreditch, London and have a small, yet dedicated staff of keen team players to assist in our productions. Our company remit is to 'put short film back on the media map, without pandering to commercial tastes, whilst at the same time tackling emotive and sometimes difficult subjects - hell, even taboo subjects - and presenting them in a stylish and accessible way for the movie going mainstream'. Phew!
Andrew Farmer - a name that instills fear within many of the film industry's boardrooms and committees.
Andrew started making films at technical college whilst studying for an 'S' level in woodwork. Bored with the lessons, he borrowed his Dad's Betamax video camera and made a film to show his lecturer just how shit he really was. That film, 'Both Hands Behind The Cutting Edge' now regularly changes hands on Ebay for upwards of £15. A friend entered this film into the Tyne & Wear Film Festival in 1984 where it went on to pick up the prize for best short film. Andrew's career had started. With no formal training and nothing but ideas, Andrew turned down advice and refused to go to film school, instead throwing himself into making a series of documentaries about Thatcher's Britain. 'Signing On', 'Bored', 'On the Fiddle', 'Loafer' and 'Home Brew' made up the pentad of films that epitomized dole-ite northern Britain in 1985 and saw Andrew honing his skills as director and editor to a fine order.
In 1986 after a move to London, Andrew's squat was raided by the police. He was about to make 'Funny Hand Shake', his seminal film about the dark world of Freemasonry in the east end. This was to mark the beginning of regular phone tapping and general authoritarian harassment - something that dogs Andrew to this day. The years 1987 through to 1994 however, remain something of a mystery with Andrew rediscovering his sexuality and losing himself in carefree abandon on the London gay scene.
1995 was to mark a return to the media with Andrew working as 'ideas guru' for what was to have been the follow up to teen show 'Reportage'. After a blistering fight with Janet Street Porter he was sacked and instantly formed Lacklustre. This started as nothing more than a few cardboard boxes and empty pot noodle cartons on a damp basement floor in Shoreditch. Soon Andrew and his camera became a regular fixture around the bars and restaurants of this desolate area of London. Back then the place was run down and empty - a far cry from the hustle and bustle of the 'rocket not lettuce' set of today.
Much of this footage never saw the light of day as Andrew sank further into a deep depression, seemingly unable to finish anything. 'Gavin' a fly on the wall documentary about a struggling young film editor, was widely criticized for being too introverted and for a while it looked like Andrew was destined to become just another film industry statistic.
But in 2000, Farmer returned to the spotlight with a vengence with his stunning documentary 'Cool Britannia'. For this he went undercover as would-be PR guru for New Labour and made a film that both shocked and appalled the world. It was partly this film that was to prove the downfall of that very PR team a few years later and will be best remembered for Andrew's outrageous footage of Alistair Campbell dressed as a transvestite.
But if anyone had thought Andrew's films were going to get lighter or less confrontational with old age, they've had to think again. In 2004, Lacklustre was injected with a lump sum of funding - a donation from a former gay lover who had sadly passed away. And so Lacklustre as it stands today was born, with new directors, a new team made up of some of film and TV's most controversial renegades - including the inimitable Grahame Cookie, and a new roster for the coming years. 2004 therfore marked the rebirth of not only Andrew Farmer, but also of Lacklustre Productions and the short film as well. www.lacklustreproductions.com

My Interests

Making Shorts, Drinking, Eating

I'd like to meet:

Liberace, Elvis, Ferris Beuller, Alan Macgee, Gene Simmons, China Crisis, Tommy Cooper, Joe 90's dad.

Music:

Creation Records, Gay Indie Pop, Talulah Gosh, minimalist glitch electro-core, serious blip, bleep, art-wank, anything French

Movies:

Andrew Farmer Filmography
FAST LANE EDDIE I & II.
Come with us as we try and find beauty in the mundane. Life in the fast lane. With Eddie.

RAILTOUR 2006, UNCERTIFIED
EARLY LACKLUSTRE
'GAVIN' - 1996, CERTIFICATE X, 24 MINS 'COOL BRITTANIA' - 2001, CERTIFICATE X, 29 MINS
PRE-LACKLUSTRE'BOTH HANDS BEHIND THE CUTTING EDGE' - 1984, UNCERTIFIED, 8 MINS 'SIGNING ON' - 1986, UNCERTIFIED, 12 MINS 'BORED' - 1986, UNCERTIFIED, 13 MINS 'SUBBUTEO WORLD CUP FINAL'* - 1986, UNCERTIFIED, 24 MINS 'ON THE FIDDLE' - 1987, UNCERTIFIED, 12 MINS 'LOAFER' - 1987, UNCERTIFIED, 15 MINS 'HOME BREW' - 1987, UNCERTIFIED, 17 MINS 'FUNNY HAND SHAKE' - 1988, UNCERTIFIED, 26 MINS
(* - released as FLICK TO KICK in former Eastern block countries)

Television:

Reportage, Foolabout

Books:

Editing For Dummies

Heroes:

None

My Blog

AF found again

Andrew has turned up again.... thankfully.He’s been working on a documentary about Essex poets and been hiding and sleeping rough in Epping Forest for a few months.Many thanx for all your help a...
Posted by Lacklustre Productions on Fri, 14 Mar 2008 06:39:00 PST

Andrew Farmer wherabouts?

We are trying to track down Andrew Farmer who hasn't been seen nor heard of since mid August. It is possible that he has gone back to Scotland. If anyone in the media industry or amongst his friends s...
Posted by Lacklustre Productions on Sat, 03 Nov 2007 01:19:00 PST

Andrew Farmer Blog Part One

MAY 12 2007Just got back from Hawaii where i've spent 3 gloriousweeks following the Honolulu Waste Disposal Unit emptying the Trash of the Rich and Famous. I can tell you it's been a right eye opener ...
Posted by Lacklustre Productions on Wed, 18 Jul 2007 07:40:00 PST

Farmer Sells Stake In Lacklustre

As of today 17th July 2007, Andrew farmer has sold his 51% stake in Lacklustre Productions to the other shareholders. Andrew will still be retained as 'Film-Maker-in-Chief'. We wish Andrew all the bes...
Posted by Lacklustre Productions on Wed, 18 Jul 2007 07:37:00 PST

What Price Failiure?

Andrew Farmer here. I was absolutely gutted to see the latest viewing figures and ratings for my last short film 'Fast Lane Eddie 2', follow up to the highly successful and critically aclaimed 'Fast L...
Posted by Lacklustre Productions on Sun, 01 Jul 2007 02:03:00 PST

GRAHAME COOKIE IN CALIFORNIA

Hi folks. Grahame here. Whilst Andy's off in the deepest depths of Yorkshire filming some more art wank, I'm over in Los Angeles trying to set up Lacklustre U.S. of Stateside. It hasn't been easy, wha...
Posted by Lacklustre Productions on Thu, 03 May 2007 09:40:00 PST

IN PRODUCTION: THE CHERRY TOP FARM MONOLOGUES

IN PRODUCTION: THE CHERRY TOP FARM MONOLOGUESAndrew Farmer goes to Wensleydale to get some views from one of Yorkshires most outspoken farmers.Due November 2007.
Posted by Lacklustre Productions on Tue, 24 Apr 2007 01:06:00 PST

FAST LANE EDDIE I & II

FAST LANE EDDIE I & IIThe next Andrew Farmer shorts are Fast Lane Eddie IandFast Lane Eddie IICome with us as we try and find beauty in the mundane. Life in the fast lane. With Eddie.Out May 1st 2007....
Posted by Lacklustre Productions on Tue, 24 Apr 2007 01:03:00 PST

IN PRODUCTION:DOUBLE BILL

IN PRODUCTION:DOUBLE BILLDOUBLE BILLLacklustre Productions in association with the Lincolnshire Film BoardJOURNEYS TO CLEETHORPESTHE GRIMSBY GIMLETBy Andrew Farmer
Posted by Lacklustre Productions on Thu, 08 Mar 2007 11:49:00 PST

IN PRODUCTION:F*T AS FUCK

IN PRODUCTION:F*T AS FUCKA short about lifestyle choices and body weight... from both ends of the spectrum. Fat/fit people, living, eating, running, walking, talking. Andrew Farmer, York Dec. 2006....
Posted by Lacklustre Productions on Sat, 16 Dec 2006 01:03:00 PST