Hello world! My Name Is Uncle Ruck. No relation to that cartoon guy.Well , he is really my uncle but I don't like to tell people that because atevery family reunion he gets drunk and starts calling everybodyni@@ers.Uncle Murda is actually my uncle too. You may ask yourself ,why does he call himself Uncle Ruck? Because I wanted to be an uncletoo gotdamnit! I can't have kids due to my only having one testacle. Icall him James. I am an Artist/Producer from Birmingham , AL and no Iam not a product of incest. Well ; maybe. I like to spit my little rapsfrom time to time , I usually have my daughter write them for me in myhip - hop sweat shop downstairs. Shhhhh! Don't tell anyone. I makebeats also
or as I like to call them , Melody Babies. Aren't they cute? I am alsothe only producer to ever make Kanye West and Pharrell Williams cryactual tears. Yes! I said it! Tears! I played them a track the otherday and they said that it was so terrible that they wanted to cry ; andthen they cried. I've also been compared to many great hip-hop artistssuch as Craig Mack , Mc Hammer , Regis Philbin , etc. I like to slapthe shit out of random old ladies just to see the expression on theirfaces right before they have a heart attack. Priceless! My otherhobbies include tracking down everyone who posts hateful things aboutme on the internet and crapping on their porches. And their dogs andchildren. Nothing like camping out after the deed is done and watchingsomeone step onto the front porch and receive my surprise. Priceless!Seriously though , I am just a regular guy , making regular music ,having regular fun. So reach into your pockets and buy my crap withsome of your regular money! Thank you for reading. Wait ; I didn't knowyou could read!For services or info contact UncleR. at [email protected] or205-213-8369. Any further inquiries contact WizHoffa the NoizeMobGeneral at www.myspace.com/wizhoffa or at [email protected] of Uncle Ruck was written by The Honorable Flava Flav.Comments...."I learned everything I know from him! Honestly. Without him ; there is no me!" -Dr.Dre"I wanted to sign him but just couldn't afford him. His stock is just too high!"
-JayZ"That's right! Spaceship was about me. You got a problem with that?"
-LaRonica from the projects of the galaxy Nebulon 6"I listened to one of his beats and got pregnant instantly."
-Paris Hilton"He's one of the best artist I've heard in years!"
-Vanilla Ice"We just did some tracks the other day and I must say that I was impressed. Wait a minute! Is that camera on? I'm supposed to be dead here!"
-Tupac Shakur"Everytime I see him I just wanna get naked!"
-Your Momma
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