I'm an energetic, optimistic, fun-lovin', hard-workin', balls-to-the-wall comedian living in Los Angeles and touring the country.
WEBSITE: CLAUDESTUART.com Check me out!
SCHEDULE: APPEARANCE SCHEDULE
10 Min Sampler
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I am here to re-connect with old friends; meet new friends; stay in touch with all my fans; and have an occasional threesome with bikini-clad twins. (JUST KIDDIN', HONEY!)..
I'm a rocker at heart; my top 5 favorite bands are Led Zeppelin, Aerosmith, Guns N' Roses, Rush and Van Halen (both Sammy and Diamond Dave). Today I love The Killers, Green Day, Blink 182, Norah Jones, Pink, Jay-Z, Ludacrous, Fallout Boy and Jurassic Five .I love a lot of songs from the 80s......whenever I hear Prince's "Little Red Corvette" or "When Doves Cry", I get a little nostalgic and a little turned on. Okay, a lot turned on! I love songs like Rick Springfield's "Jesse's Girl", Night Ranger's "Sister Christian", Patty Smythe and Scandal's "The Warrior". Don't forget Run-D.M.C.!I love classic rock ranging from The Beatles, Billy Joel, Heart, Springsteen, Mellencamp, Cheap Trick, Journey. (you can't go wrong makin' out in the backseat of a car with Journey on.....as long as it's a CD or radio and not an 8-track.)I love the oldies and jazz, too.And call me immature but if somebody puts on The Beastie Boys at a party, I'm fuckin' dancing, baby!
My favorite two movies of last year were Ray and Sideways. I love the acting, the stories and directing. They were charming, amusing, and incredibly entertaining. And I'm not just typing this 'cause the movie studios are paying me to.....what?All the Indiana Jones and Star Wars movies rock. I hate to jump on the macho bandwagon, but the first two Godfather films are amazing. You can't go wrong with movies at least written by Tarrantino, such as Pulp Fiction, Resevoir Dogs and True Romance.I always like a good suspenseful film.....Cape Fear, Silence of the Lambs, Kiss the Girls. You show me a movie with a beautiful woman, a hot-headed detective and a blood-thirsty psycho.....and I'll be sreaming, "For the love of all that's Holy, don't take a shower by yourself; he's in the closet!" Or I'll at least be on the edge of my seat choking on a popcorn kernel.I also enjoy fairly serious films where there's not a lot of action but great acting, like Rain Man and Lost In Translation. A lot of people say "Nothing happened in Lost in Translation"! But plenty was going on in the minds of Billy Murray's and Scarlett Johanssens's characters.....she's amazing!Of course, I love silly comedies.....the Vacation movies with Chevy Chase, Animal House, Old School, the Naked Gun movies.And I'll be honest.....I shed a tear or two at the emotional films. I don't bawl but I do get sad. Dakota Fanning, the little girl in I Am Sam with Sean Penn, made me cry. She's gonna be a huge name in Hollywood; trust me!And anything that has Ed Norton, Denzel Washington, Michelle Pfiffer or Kate Winslett is always worth watching.
Currently......Entourage, Lost, South Park, Medium, Cold Case, and 24.The three best written sitcoms ever are Seinfeld, Cheers and All in the Family.As a kid, I loved Dukes of Hazzard, Knight Rider, The Fall Guy (I used to want to be a stuntman....seriously, I would jump on the back of my parent's cars when they were going to work and jump off of swingsets onto trampolines and into swimming pools. I preceded Jackass! I'm luck to be alive, baby!)I must share this: Recently I was talking to a girl who actually said, "I haven't seen Southpark since Cartman was anally probed." That was like in the first episode! That's like saying, "I haven't seen Gilligan's Island since they went to the Island."
Okay, my favorite books off the top of my head (Translation: "That I remember reading in highschool") are John Irving's The World According to Garp, Aldous Huxley's Brave New World, J.D. Salinger's Catcher in the Rye, William Faulkner's The Sound and the Fury, and John Steinbeck's Of Mice and Men. And what's the one by Anne Rice about the horny vampires?My parents just raved about a new bestseller written by a young woman that's an amazing thriller called Retribution.....they're making a movie about it. I'm going to read it and keep you posted. Control your anticipation.
Comics - Bill Hicks, Richard Pryor, George Carlin, Lenny Bruce, Sam Kininson, Chris Rock, Dennis Miller, Jim Carrey.Comics turned actors - Steve Martin, Billy Crystal, Ellen DeGeneres.Rock Stars - Robert Plant, Steve Tyler, Axl Rose (before the plastic surgeory, the blonde dreadlocks; when he was dating Stephanie Seymour), David Lee Roth (before he started losing his hair and pretending he wasn't).Firefighters. Teachers who actually work hard and try to inspire their students. Anyone who is fighting for our country in the military overseas. They are much braver than most of us.My late grandmother Martha "Presh" Campbell. She was a white woman in a small, racist town in Mississippi who founded group homes for underprivileged black children and always fought for civil rights.....even during times of segregation. She was amazing.